Excessive Crying.

[_Asti_]

When does crying become abnormal?

 

Under what circustmances would crying be deemed..normal?

 

I ask this because I've been crying alot lately, such as driving to work, in the shower, in bed at night before I go to sleep.

 

I suffered depression when I was younger, and aside from crying, I don't really fit into being depressed...aside from being tired and feeling exhausted constantly.

 

Can stress cause this? Feeling overwhelmed with things? Anxious? Guilty?

 

I am dealing with alot of emotions with various things...and am wondering is this what happens when you don't deal effectively with things? They just bubble up and let themselves out?

 

I'm just tired of crying constantly.

[melrich]

Can stress cause this? Feeling overwhelmed with things? Anxious? Guilty?

 

Yes, absolutely. What is going on in your life that may be causing this do you think?

[_Asti_]

Well, for one, my mother battling terminal cancer.

 

I don't think I've ever had time to accept it, or come to terms with it as she was diagnosed a week before Christmas last year, and once the holidays were over, I was right back into life of working two jobs, volunteering, finishing University, running the household and taking her to treatments/appointements.

 

Since I graudated school in the spring, I landed my career even before school was finished and hopped into working full time, which I was glad to, but with it has come some added unwanted, yet not suprising stress of working for a brand new organization who have no clue what they are doing.

 

I haven't stopped.

 

Plus now, I've made the choice to move out of my home and now I just feel guilty as she has taken a turn for the worst.

 

I just feel exhausted and overwhelmed.

[90_hour_sleep]

that about sums it up. you've been distracted. perhaps you haven't fully been able to release because of that. when you're constantly occupied...it can be so easy to just ignore what you're really feeling. you cling to things that keep you from facing what's going on inside of you (although, not consciously in general). it makes sense that you'd be exhausted. there are natural cycles in life...and some of those cycles involve a period of regeneration. your body may have been trying to tell you this for a very long time...but you've been caught up in the busyness of everyday life. now...it's come to the point where the need to regenerate cannot be denied. can you go with it? is there any way that you can slow down...listen to your body...just let yourself rest for some time? feel what you're feeling...let it happen...and continue to happen until you've released it all. just remember to really focus on how it feels.

 

i went through a similar period...i ended up sleeping for entire days sometimes.

i count it as one of the most valuable periods i've ever experienced.

 

hope you can find some time to take care of you.

 

cheers

[_Asti_]

I wish I could take some time, but I just don't see it happening for quite some time. Maybe once I am settled in my new place, I can take some time for myself and unwind.

 

Thanks though, it does make sense.

I just feel like I am on my way to a giant breakdown.

[90_hour_sleep]

I wish I could take some time, but I just don't see it happening for quite some time. Maybe once I am settled in my new place, I can take some time for myself and unwind.

 

Thanks though, it does make sense.

I just feel like I am on my way to a giant breakdown.

 

well...in a way i'm sorry to hear that...but at the same time, based on my own experience...it will be a tremendous opportunity for you. it may not be pleasant at first...but you'll learn to appreciate what you're experiencing. i know it can often be easy to push what you're feeling aside...to really deny yourself the true experience of it. that may happen again...but if you can...try to focus fully on what you're going through. it is the most intensely liberating experience. you will feel lighter...more alive...and in a very general sense...just better.

 

do you have anyone that can help you through this? is there someone that can just listen to you? i know from your past posts that you're in a stable long-term relationship. let it help you...let him help you. these are the experiences that really allow relationships blossom into something more...something profoundly more real than an idea of love.

 

i hope you find the time...and the space...to let yourself unfold. you will never be sorry that you've allowed that to happen.

 

all the best.

 

cheers

[_Asti_]

I am pretty good in terms of finding the silver lining in everything and anything.

 

What I have gone through with my Mother has been such an amazing experience, and as crappy as it is, it's be absolutely amazing for myself and my family. The lessons, the ability to appreciate every little thing, its been such an amazing experience that in a way I am very thankful to be able to go through what I am..and being able to have grown.

 

But I know I am not dealing with it correctly because when I walk away from things, I break down and cry.

I've read some amazing books, one mainly being "Broken Open" and reading it made complete sense, and made me feel ok in the way things are, and learning that every obstacle is a gift, and thats how I feel most of the time...and thats why suddenly I am so confused as to why I am crying constantly.

 

 

I have many people supporting me. Many.

The family and extended family is amazing. The family has gone through so much death and illness in the last three years that everyone can understand and support.

I have great friends, great co-workers, and above all an amazing partner.

I seem to talk constantly...but I don't necessarily feel any 'progress' or anything liberating.

I reach out, find support, find a connection and a bond with other people to open up, but it just leaves me feeling broken and even more saddened.

 

 

I feel like I am stuck in a state of ying and yang.

I am soooo happy, appreciative, lucky and greatful for everything and everyone in my life. I love my life, truly and fully. Every little thing.

So it just baffles me as to why I find myself sitting and crying at a red light at 7:30am on a Tuesday morning.