It always hurts

[Kalypso]

Everytime we start to have sex, it really hurts her when I put it in.. But a little while after that it's fine.

Is this normal? To hurt EVERY time?

Is it preventable? How?

 

Also, we use condoms.

[Cheeks18]

Try and warm her up per say.

Like some fingering, and going down on her, to loosen her up a little.

 

I had this problem with my ex, if I didnt do work down there first it would hurt her.

[lostandhurt]

No it isn't "normal" for there to be pain like that everytime. Is she wet enough? Are you using lube? How much foreplay are you doing before?

 

Try slowing everything way down. Let her control everything. How fast, deep and see if it helps.

 

Lost

[guynextdoor]

More foreplay, use lube. Likes cheeks said use fingers first.

[Northern Lad]

Its probabaly juts like the others say more foreplay needed or lube etc.

 

however when my and my wife first met we had the same problem, We joked that it was because I was hung like a baboon, but that fantasy soon dissipated ha ha, she went to the doctor and it turned out she had an 'erosion' on her cervix, not caused by sti's or anyhting like that just a common womans problem. She had a simple procedure under general anaesthetic and its been fine since. So she may want to see her gp.

[waveseer]

Condoms are tacky and when they stick to the tender female love folds it can hurt. If she isn't getting wet enough you probably need to use some lubricant.

[Cognitive_Canine]

It hurst me every time at first. Once he gets it in all the way, the pain leaves and it starts feeling amazing. We've tried lube, we've had sex without condoms, and I'm definitely warmed up enough.

 

Frankly, I think it's for three reasons

 

1) My boyfriend is larger than most and I am a 5'3'' girl. So, it's just a matter of size difference

 

2) We don't have sex that often due to being in an LDR. So, the longer between sessions, the more it hurts. However, we've had sex just about 3 times a week for a month straight over christmas break. Still hurt every time upon entery (and he is very gentle. Goes in very slow. Waits for me to give him the go).

 

3) I just naturally tense up. Once he is in all the way and the good sensations are activated, I loosen up a lot and the pain goes away. I haven't found away to ease up just by myself though.

 

It's sort of a mind over matter thing. I have to teach myself how to ease up by myself. Then I believe it will stop hurting.

[Speranza]

Check out a condom allergy, since you've mentioned it. There are allergens in some lubes too. MOST likely to be lack of lubrication, but it will pass if you persevere. Pain during sex should always be checked out though - could be a cervical erosion or even ovary problems.

[Kalypso]

It's usually like 20 minutes of foreplay and she is usually really wet so I'm not too sure if thats the problem..

[Mia_of_Doom]

Can she identify what kind of pain it is and where?

 

I agree with Speranza. If it's not foreplay, she may have a latex allergy, or issues with her cervix/uterus/ovaries. Has she been to a gynecologist?

[Kalypso]

She's only 17 so she probably doesn't want to do that.

[Sparkly Eyes]

Is she very tight at first when you enter her and then gradually opens up? AND how long has she been having sex?

[Capricorn3]

She's only 17 so she probably doesn't want to do that.

She's still very young (you both are), so please don't take this the wrong way, but I think a lot of it has to do with lack of experience in many areas. She's probably tensing up a lot because she's now expecting it to hurt, so even if she's not aware of tensing up, it WILL hurt her every time. Also, 20 minutes foreplay is way too short to get her prepared properly (imo). A lot more foreplay can be very helpful, as can extra lube. Take your time and don't rush into it.

[Kalypso]

Is she very tight at first when you enter her and then gradually opens up? AND how long has she been having sex?

 

Yes, she is.