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Wingman... [color=#fa7777]* [/color][color=#fa7777]* [/color][color=#fa7777]* [/color]?

cazmoore

By cazmoore
in Relationship Advice

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cazmoore Contributor

cazmoore

Posted
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Someone explain to me.. what exactly is a "wingman"? My boyfriend goes out and occasionally says he's the 'wingman' when there's a guy he's with who's not very good approaching girls. Is a wingman just a cop out term used so he can talk to women? He asked me before if it's all right, and he's done it when I was out with him and his friends, but I'm not sure what to make of it.

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_Asti_ Community Regular

_Asti_

Posted
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Depends.

IS your guy the type to go out, flirt, hit on other woman and use an excuse like that to meet other girls?

 

My guy has been a wingman before.

Many of his buddies are single, and he goes to break the ice, be moral/social support when they go out, just having someone there so that the single guy isn't put in an awkward position when trying to meet girls.

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mrmaximum Enthusiast

mrmaximum

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Sometimes, if there are two women, one of them may get jealous and try to take her friend away from the guy who is on the make. The wingman then lighten's the mood and give's some attention to the target's friend (I hate to say it like that but I guess that is the crux of the issue.)

 

I have had a few buddies tell me that they have gone in solo and gotten shut down even when the woman was interested as their friends repeatedly 'wanted to go home.' In essence, the wingman lessens the chances of being c--kblocked.

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Cognitive_Canine Enthusiast

Cognitive_Canine

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A wingman is there to support his friend. To give him courage to talk to girls. To try and find girls for his friends. To tell the girls good things about his friend and get them interested. To keep her friends at bay and keep them from dragging her away. And to help him get out of hanging with a girl if he suddenly finds her uninteresting.

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annie24 Grand Master

annie24

Posted
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i guess if your bf's friend is interested in some girl at a party or at a bar, and she is with some friends, then it is easier to 'mingle' the two groups together, rather than one guy approaching a bunch of girls by himself and picking only one to talk to. anyways, i wouldn't worry so much, as long as you think your guy is honest! i've been in that situation, where the wingman openly tells me about his gf or wife, and shares stories about her, so there is no confusion in my mind why he is talking to me. (ie, he's only talking to me so his friend can hook up with my friend, lol)

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Aviatormy Apprentice

Aviatormy

Posted
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Go watch Top Gun!

 

 

Exactly! I really doubt that he is trying to pick up on these other friends of the "target" he is just there for moral support for his friend and to engage in useless conversation with the "target"s friends

 

I have done this many times. Be happy that he is willing to do this. It shows that he is a closet romantic

 

It is also a great sign that he asked your permission. I would not look too much further into it.

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annie24 Grand Master

annie24

Posted
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I have had a few buddies tell me that they have gone in solo and gotten shut down even when the woman was interested as their friends repeatedly 'wanted to go home.' In essence, the wingman lessens the chances of being c--kblocked.

 

yeah, that is so annyoing. when i meet a guy, and then my friend(s) want to go home. arrgggh. especially if i am only in town for the night as we are on vacation!

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Cognitive_Canine Enthusiast

Cognitive_Canine

Posted
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i guess if your bf's friend is interested in some girl at a party or at a bar, and she is with some friends, then it is easier to 'mingle' the two groups together, rather than one guy approaching a bunch of girls by himself and picking only one to talk to. anyways, i wouldn't worry so much, as long as you think your guy is honest! i've been in that situation, where the wingman openly tells me about his gf or wife, and shares stories about her, so there is no confusion in my mind why he is talking to me. (ie, he's only talking to me so his friend can hook up with my friend, lol)

 

Exactly. I've had this happen to.

 

Girls travel in packs at bars. They are dangerous if you are on your own (could get too drunk, date raped, mugged, have a guy take advantage of your bad judgment).

 

But, if one of my girlfriends is getting hit on by a guy and the rest of us aren't having a fun time...we aren't going to just leave her. If I'm having an engaging conversation with someone else (and just talking to a guy who is taken is great. Non threatening yet fun.) then I'll be happy.

 

Yes, I'm the "we gotta go" girl.

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thejigsup Experienced

thejigsup

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This is funny, but when I was younger and went out with my friends (who were all gorgeous and I was just cute!) I was always the target of the wingman. Ended up dating a few of them as they were generally pretty nice guys. They have their uses and if they will help a friend like that, they are worth getting to know.

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Unknown1607307972 Contributor

Unknown1607307972

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Heh my boyfriend was playing "wingman" for his brother when they were on holiday in July. Basically just being there as someone to help him get talking to someone if she's with friends, but who won't be competiton against him any girl he may like. My boyfriend is very confident and chatty while his brother is much quieter and shy with girls. I trust my boyfriend completley, he's got my picture in his wallet and he says it's because he's so proud of me as his girl he never pretends to be single and I know he loves me. Being a wingman can be completley harmless as they could just be helping out a friend by getting them to open up and putting them at ease when talking to girls. I think the OP shouldn't worry, her boyfriend was open about it and it doesn't seem suspicious to me.

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Cognitive_Canine Enthusiast

Cognitive_Canine

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This is funny, but when I was younger and went out with my friends (who were all gorgeous and I was just cute!) I was always the target of the wingman. Ended up dating a few of them as they were generally pretty nice guys. They have their uses and if they will help a friend like that, they are worth getting to know.

 

Wingmen typically have good qualities. Loyal to friends. Clever. Charming. Full of tact. Bold.

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