rich_1517 - museum went fine

[rich_1517]

just to let you know the museum date went fine, she is making more contact physically. but blah blah, i have no idea where this is going. i really dont.

 

she obviously feels comfortable around me, thats very clear.

 

she wants more details about tomorrow night, i havent told her yet thats its salsa and tango.

 

i just told her wear something nice you can move in.

 

but of course i am still frustrated at the pace, what is going on here, does she know, does anyone know? and what is the cost?

 

i am actually having fun now on these dates. but i am coming into a week when she doesnt have her son. i will not be asking for more dates yet, i will wait.

[Beec]

just to let you know the museum date went fine, she is making more contact physically. but blah blah, i have no idea where this is going. i really dont.

 

she obviously feels comfortable around me, thats very clear.

 

she wants more details about tomorrow night, i havent told her yet thats its salsa and tango.

 

i just told her wear something nice you can move in.

 

but of course i am still frustrated at the pace, what is going on here, does she know, does anyone know? and what is the cost?

 

i am actually having fun now on these dates. but i am coming into a week when she doesnt have her son. i will not be asking for more dates yet, i will wait.

 

Rich, you don't know where it is going and neither should she. We know where you want it to go, do what you can.

 

Glad the museum went well. Your plan for tomorrow should include instructions on shoes. I can move in sneakers, but not dance well on a wood floor wearing them. Just ask, and if they are ok, say fine. If not, make a suggestion. I like not telling her, but all guys seem to like ti more than women.

 

Relax with the pace, you seem to be doing fine. Don't push anything. Keep it up, be fun, have fun, you'll get there.

[rich_1517]

well its funny. im actually expecting her to blink soon. after tomorrow it will be kind of clear where this is or is not headed.

 

and frankly i am open to either. i love her a lot but to continue in too much ambiguity is damaging for the collective respect of me.

 

an advantage i do have is she doesnt feel in real time, so she could go along and just fall back into place without consciouslessly deciding it. meaning her actions precede her decisions around emotions sometimes. which is good when its something positive and wretched when its not.

 

but if she blinks (pulls back) i will say thats ok, i have showed up as best i can but...... you know the drill.

 

on the other hand we may both be really trying a go slow and not blow it. she knows she has an upper hand but soon the emotions will come into play and thats my cue to just be me without too much effort above (thats a good thing). much of my changes allow for more fun anyway.

[Beec]

Do nto exert any pressure Rich. Remain aloof. If she tries to shoot you down, remain aloof. If she asks you to amrry her, remain aloof. If she takes off her clothes and says jump me, try to show a little restraint (for somethings who CAN remain aloof).

[rich_1517]

i get it beec, i got that dose last night with the "its early for that" regarding the kiss.

 

kind of arrogant even if it is an itsy bitsy little otpimistic, jeez i want to shoot myself.

 

i think i have a better handle on whats happening with her. before she can walk i think she really wants to know that im not the one.

 

im a pretty good catch in all humilty. im good looking, very nurturing by nature but self directed (most of the time), my needs are not huge, but im fun, making people laugh is my favorite thing to do. and relationship skills (no kidding) are my strong point.

 

we compliment very well, and i think she knows she may not find that combo easily, especially because she isnt aggressive enough to "go get" what she wants. she also knows i have said i can accept her, and for all her saying that "its my choices that cause my bahviour" i also think she is afraid that she may repeat her emotional hang ups with someone new.

 

it has to have crossed her mind that i wont wait forever. hence no phone calls or date ideas after tomorrow. let her go out do what she will do, but i may not be around much this weekend.

 

but you are correct if i read you right, she needs as do i, to see the in control rich who makes sound decisions and can respond. i will now write test reponses for myself.