regger Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 Ok, so my ex and i broke up about 6 months ago we went through a rough patch where i was so angry with him etc..didnt talk for ages..he would send me random nice messages saying i miss you etc and then say well no i dont want to go out with you. Recently, i have been seeing him as friends, trying to build upon whatever was left and we have become really close again. Problem is is that he says he has feelings for another girl...yet...continues to see me and whenever i mention her..he gets angry? There are pictures of me all around his room, stuff i gave him etc. Whenever i see him he just cuddles me and says im beautiful etc. Say ..for example..i left a ring at his house the other day and i came back to get it and it had gotten "lost". So i left....3 days later i get a call saying "i found your ring" and he admitted that he had hidden it cos he "wanted to see me". I AM SO CONFUSED lol what does he want??!! The other night we had a friends party and i treated him like i eould the other guys and he admitted to me yesterday the whole time he was trying to get in my way and get my attention. What do I do? I miss him sooo much when i dont see him....but i feel like if i see him too much he will get sick of me and go to this other girl. What to do?? THANKS IN ADVANCE!!! Link to comment
Xplode Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 testing his waters... trying to find whats a better option. for somereason. wether it be looks. this girl has something over him. thats is making him lean her way.. but fall back on you? not an expert here. but sounds like something i would do./did. Link to comment
Maya_A Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 If he says things like he does not want to go out with you & that he is interested in another girl, and also at the same time says things like he hid your ring to see you again & says he was trying hard to get your attention at the party, then it seems he is playing with you. I could be mistaken but it almost has a feel that he is enjoying giving you mixed messages. Like it is a little playful game to him... If he flat out says he does not want to date you but is giving off this other contrary energy, I can't help but at least make a guess as a possibility that if you have already been intimate, maybe he wishes to continue to "get some" with you until he gets hooked up with someone else... What do you do? If it were me I'd tell him that if he does not want to date as he said, to quit flirting with me & treat me like the friend he would like me to be. Stop doing things like keeping my rings & trying to get my attention. I'd say long the lines of "if you have changed your mind & would like to date again you need to tell me so I can decide on it on my own, or stop flirting & doing ridiculous things around me." And if he didn't stop, kept pursing other women & at the same time was clear he didn't want to date you, I'd simply stop being so readily available to him & stop being receptive in any way to his "mixed message" behaviors. Link to comment
SpeedingCars Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 The fact that he said he has feelings for another girl says it all. huuuuge red flag! Link to comment
regger Posted April 15, 2009 Author Share Posted April 15, 2009 thing is.....whenever i mention her..he is always like...dont bring her up..blah blah and then i say well just ask her out and he says no..its "too much effort" can we please stop talking about her. seriously....im so confused! i just dont get it...go out with her already and stop screwing me over...or argh makes me so frustrated!!! i love him more than anything and...like....he just doesn't get it! he says he switches between liking her and liking me..which is total bull cos ...you just dont do that deep down you KNOW who you like not two people. the thing is..im afraid if i cut off contact..those two will get closer and ill just be left behind to be forgotten when ive given everything to try and make it work with him Link to comment
SpeedingCars Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 You keeping contact with him doesn't help you at all. He's getting his cake and eating it too. Get your respect/dignity back. Who knows, if you give him space... maybe he'll realize that you're the one for him and not her. Either way, you win. Because either you'll heal or he'll come back. NC is the way to go. Link to comment
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