My growing feelings

[Suavemantotherescue]

I'm usually a cool guy around girls, I see them as indeviduals and people before potential conquest, but since 3 years ago I ment my old best friend and I feel terribly in love with her, even though I know it probably isn't. Well as you may have guessed, we're not so close as we use to be and we are hardly friends since I never see her anymore. We stopped talking cuz of...well I dunno, she just ignored me for awhile then we started talking alittle (Not that much, just hi and bye and how you doing) but after graduation, we lost touch. I know we still have a bond because when I see her, we both smile big and her eyes twinkle, she has a smile that looks coy and sassy, flips her hair, and laughs at all I say. She basically says "Hey long time no speak!" and ask me how everything is and junk like that. We always pause when we talk to and she averts her gaze.

Its just that I never see her that much and she has a more mature life than I'm kindda of a inner child dude and I have no job and life with my parents and go to college, while she has a job, and cool car, and lottsa money. She lives with her parents too but she parties more. I feel like are lifes are compleatly different from eachother than they use to, thus we have no way to cross paths very often. I just was just about to forget about her, then I see her.She was in her car and she waved at me. I then realized that she ment too much too me to give up now. Well can anyone tell me what I, or both of us, feel? Am I just confused or is this real?

 

 

P.S. Don't tell me stuff about body language (M. Bison Dude) or tell me to ask her out for coffee or whatever since I plan to ask her to do something once I know. Just give me a straight, heart-felt answer, please.

[Emotional]

I think she Is lookin at u as a friend right now..maybe more who knows? have u seen her walkin or talkin with ne other guys?? If she smiles at u and gives a twingle galre it may indicate she likes u again .. If u really want her back my answer to u is to try to talk to her..flirt with her like the old times..she will start to like u even more than befor and if shes aggresive she may ask YOU out again..or maybe u can walk ur way throught that with her..next tim eu see her make a more flirtatous approach like hey babe u look really nice today or something u k no> that will give her confidence to flirt some with u and who knows where that may go..

well babe im sorry i cant give u the best answer , im going through the same thing but e and that guy are both 15 kinda a immature age might a lot of u older ppl say..but this guy was from cali and new to my school..and ever since we broke up n got back together n broke up again..he does the twinkle in his eye and a grin on his face too..and ive noticed our lifes are completely diff and we aint that good friends either..

so pretty much similar situation and theres not much i can do bout it

i hope everything works out between you and ur gurl! id make a face but i cant i unno how lol

[funkygirl758]

One way I would look at it, is if you two are never in the same place at the same time, maybe you don't have a lot in common or common interests and if that is true, there may not be anything to build a relationship on. Just something to consider.

[ldwickw]

WEll I am awnsering your question from a past experience similar to that. I have been with my boyfriend for quite sometime now and it started the same as what you have explained.

We was friends very good friends then drifted apart and I couldn't quit thinking of him and when I did I'd see him or something that completely reminded me of him.

You are in love or lust with her and aren't sure how she feels for you, and it is too hard to come out and ask. I keept writing letters and calling and finally worked up the nerve to tell him my feelings and thankfully his were the same just we lead separate lives trying to ignore the feelings for one another and now we are a happy couple and have been for about 2 1/2 years.

Keep your hopes up and your dreams alive and all I can say is hopefully the feelings will change or you can find out her thoughts and then you will know and be happier and less misserable. Hope all goes well. sorry if this isn't the awnser you was looking for but I tried and would be willing to tell more if you need

[Suavemantotherescue]

Well we do have the same intrest basically. When we first met we had a good chemistry going and started being good friends from the start. Its just we have different plans for our futures I guess. Whenever we do get a chance to talk the convo flows pretty good, we just get little instances of silence were we both look down and stuff. I know where she lifes but I'm afraid to just barge in, I know her number but my friends told me I shouldn't until I TALK to her first. I also know where she works.

[raggamuffin]

I think that you do have feelings for her and if you think that you maybe in love with her than you probably are. I also think that relationships are better and last longer when they start with friendship. I dont know though if she has the same feelings for you, from what I have read I would say that she doesnt otherwise she would probaly do more that just chat and all of the things you mentioned. But thats just what I think.

[melrich]

How could anyone say whether she has feelings for you or not on what you have posted.....basically sounds like she is just being friendly to me. You say you want advice but you only want a certain type of advice...well mine would be ask her how she feels about you...simple and what have you got to lose? If she says she is not interested it is teh answer you would have got eventually anyway and if she says she is interested you have cut out a lot of mucking around.

[raggamuffin]

I agree with richgabe thats what i wanted to say but didnt do properly but that was basically what I was getting at. You cant really know what someone else thinks or feels unless you ask them. If you try to read too much into other peoples thoughts and feelings it gets complicated.

[Suavemantotherescue]

Man, I give up. I know it has to be more than friends so I'm gonna talk to her and ask and stuff.

[Xandra]

we just get little instances of silence were we both look down and stuff.

 

 

I wouldn't worry about that, it's TOTALLY NORMAL to have little awkward silences when people feel a bit tense around each other. You're obviously a bit nervous, and she probably is too. Either that or she feels the tension from YOU and doesn't know what else to say.

 

My advice to you would be to just ask her if she wants to hang out sometime. Just try to be confident, call her up and ask her what she's up to that weekend. Start small. Don't make any references to "a date", since you guys have lost touch so much. Every girl likes to have guy friends, especially ones who are friendly, easy to talk to, and ones who don't try to get down her pants automatically. What have you got to lose?

 

Try not to analyze every little thing about every interaction between you guys. There is NO WAY to tell whether or not she likes you or can see something romantic happening between you unless you take the next step and call her up. Say something like, "it was great to see you the other day, you look great! What are you up to this weekend? Me and some friends are going bowling/ to the game/ to a party, feel like coming along?" Or ... "it sucks that we lost contact, what are you up to this weekend?". Basically, anything that is non-romantic at first. Only after you spend some time with her will you be able to understand whether there is chemistry between you guys or not. If there is, take it from there. She's not going anywhere, so take things slow!! Women love that in the beginning!

 

Good luck!