dumped, but she called me (longer)

[Dev007]

Well it's been a while but I have come back for advice again because you all helped me so greatly before.

 

From the beginning, I met this girl at school through friends of friends and we started dating a couple weeks later. This had been my first real relationship for about 1 1/2 years since my previous relationship of 3 1/2 years.

 

So we had been dating for about 4-5 months and she dumps me somewhat randomly. It was bound to happen anyway because we both didn't want a long distance relationship but she wasn't leaving for at least 5 more months. I had slept over at her house and we woke up and talked for awhile about random stuff then she said she was dumping me. I took it as a joke at first, she wasn't very serious and she kept kissing me. The whole situation was confusing to me. So I finally believed her (somewhat) and said this sucks, handled myself with dignitiy (after my last time getting dumped I promised I would) hugged her and left.

 

I was imediatly going to start the "mandatory" month of no contact that I learned from last time but SHE called me later that night balling her eyes out and saying she had made a mistake. I let her do most of the talking but she never once tried to get back with me. weird and confusing again... I felt like the right thing to do was end the conversation so I said call me if you need ANYTHING and said I had to go.

 

It's been a week, I can definetely make it through 3 more weeks but that whole thing bugs me with confusion.

 

Anyone have any comments? I would appreciate them.

 

Also, I saw her friends at the bars and was hanging out with them and talking like nothing had happened. Is this OK? She dumped me right.

 

Thanks again ENA, You rock

[Stereohead]

I personally would have to consider multiple scenarios and options that only you can decide which to follow.

 

She’s going through a drama spin…breaks up with you when things seem fine…and feel miserable about it later and cries to get you back.

 

Either she’s trying to prepare herself for the long distance break up…and push you away so she doesn’t get hurt moreso by falling for you further…or she’s just as confused as you are.

 

You can…

 

One: Move forward with your life. (Non-contact/friends only)

Two: Allow her one more chance. –After talking to her about this problem of hers.

Or Three: Talk to her and decide together where this is leading.

 

Those are just some of the top ones that came to my mind. And hanging out with her friends at a bar is fine…she did dump you and it’s now your choice on where to go with this.

 

But whatever you do. Just let her know what you’ve decided…I kind of find its worse on a girl if the guy doesn’t let her know that he rather not speak with her…or let her know there’s no chance.

[cruzer]

Or Three: Talk to her and decide together where this is leading.

 

I recommend this one. She says she made a mistake, which does not say will u give me another chance, or can we be together again, but the mistake was breaking up with you, right?

 

Worst case scenario u try and work things out and she is unwilling, u know where she stands and can move on. you could still do the month of nc but i would not be hopeful