Rebound after break up

[shemo]

How many of you have hooked up with someone else right after a break up? Do you do it because you didn't love your ex enough to begin with so you just say whatever I'm gonna sleep with someone else? Do you guys do it to ease the pain and just want someone's company because you don't want to be alone? What is going on in your heads when that rebound is around? Do you still think about your ex? Or do you focus all your attention on the new person?

[Venomite]

After my breakup in September, I didn't get a rebound. However, my ex did. It lasted less than a month. The guy was pretty much the complete opposite of me, and the my ex told me her reason for having this rebound guy was because she needed to get me out of her head, and I guess this worked to that end.

[franfran]

I think usually the dumpers are the ones who have rebound relationships...they usually leave us for other people. I've done this as a dumper... went from one relationship right into the next (It actually worked for me though, until I was dumped by the new guy a few months ago! Karma is a B!) I haven't had any rebounds since, and though I've had people barking up my tree since my last relationship ended in October, I'm not acting on anything. I need more time to find the part of myself that I had lost while being with someone else, and living for someone else's happiness for over 4 years. I need more time to be completely comfortable with the thought of another man in my life and to be able to learn from mistakes in this past relationship. Now hook-ups on the other hand, I have given into those. However, I didn't feel so great after some of them, and the only reason I really did it was because I felt like being a bad girl and in a way, using other people to mask images of my ex that I was constantly having.

[drewciouS281]

ive rebounded just for the purpose to take my mind off of my ex and for comfort. It almost always made me feel like crap after wards and i missed my ex more. rebound relationships IMO rarely work so if i have a rebound, its usually just a fling for a bit and nothing more. once im over the heart break, i tend to part from the rebound cause i no longer have a use for her. lol. ouch!

[shemo]

ive rebounded just for the purpose to take my mind off of my ex and for comfort. It almost always made me feel like crap after wards and i missed my ex more. rebound relationships IMO rarely work so if i have a rebound, its usually just a fling for a bit and nothing more. once im over the heart break, i tend to part from the rebound cause i no longer have a use for her. lol. ouch!

 

Do you compare the rebound to your ex?

[drewciouS281]

afterwards yes. even if i rebound i make sure she is a hottie. while im rebounding im thinking about the girl im with at the time being plus im usually drunk. After the rebound is gone and im all alone again is when i get depressed. its just a temp fix. feel free to message me your situation or post it here.

[shemo]

afterwards yes. even if i rebound i make sure she is a hottie. while im rebounding im thinking about the girl im with at the time being plus im usually drunk. After the rebound is gone and im all alone again is when i get depressed. its just a temp fix. feel free to message me your situation or post it here.

 

i don't know if he is rebounding right now. we broke up yesterday and we are doing NC because i took his line off our family plan. i told him he needs to get a new number by himself so that i don't have the number to call him. i'm just driving myself crazy right now because he has a history of very destructive behavior not just with our relationship but in general. we broke up back in august for a few weeks and he ended up sleeping with some girl he hardly knew. he said he did it cuz he was miserable and he thought we were thru.. he had no interest in her cuz she kept trying to hook up with him again and he refused. he even went on those adult websites. i'm afraid that he's doing all that stuff again... i guess it's not really my problem anymore. just want some insight from those who have rebounded and been in similar situations and understand what's going on in your head. i dont understand how he can love me and do all those things.

[drewciouS281]

well first off like you said, none of that is your concern since you broke up and since he has done this before, it wouldnt be a surprise if he did it again. yes i know it doesnt make sense for someone that loved you to do this but like i said, they dont do it because they dont love you, they do it to fill that emotional gap. In all reality it makes things worse for the healing in the long run. I try not to rebound after a break up and just be solo till i feel im healing but sometimes it happens. some men pry on the weaker woman cause its less of a challenge knowing they just want some comfort. believe it or not there are women out there that do the same especially if its a dude they were already interested in. sorry to burst your bubble but just being real with ya.

[o_hopeless_o]

i find it incredibly selfish when people rebound to get their ex out of their mind. NC can help them do that too. Its sad to me that people have to have comfort from another person after a break up to feel better and again get them out of their head. it sort of makes them look weak. thats what i think. their intentions are not pure with this other person and using them to make themselves feel better.