Relationship with a former student...

[bpsekh]

To bring everyone up to speed, this summer I started going back to university for a graduate degree. While I'm there, I have a part-time job as a teaching assistant for some undergraduate course -- basically doing menial grading jobs that the professor is too busy to be doing, and supervising and teaching review sessions, etc.

 

Long story short, I met a nice girl in one of my classes who seems to be interested in a relationship. Hard to tell at the moment because of the circumstances. We seemed to get along well on a personal level and share the same interests, etc. We even met outside of class once or twice, on a casual level to get coffee during break time and make small talk. At the time, I was afraid to pursue anything because of certain ethical concerns. With the semester nearly over, should I allow things to take their natural course, or should I put my foot down? (Keep in mind that I am a student, albeit a bit older than her, as well). I think the only concern would be if I were to become her TA later on in another course, in which case the ethnical question would come up again.

[Sn0man]

Well you're not exactly a professor, so the ethical concerns matter much less. Let things run their course (excuse the pun)

[waveseer]

Graduate/undergraduate relationships are fair game as far as I remember. If you become a member of the faculty then it would be a different story.

[bpsekh]

Well, I reviewed the policy. The policy is that TA's do *technically* form part of the faculty, in that they work under the supervision of full-time professors and are responsible for grading. Anyhow, from the uni's point of view, it seems like a mainly bureaucratic thing. Since I won't be her instructor after this week, it won't matter.

 

On a personal note, I still have a few conflicting feelings which I will sort out later on. You'll have to pardon me for being so brief. It's rather late, and I'm not really good at talking about my feelings in the first place.

[karvala]

If you're not teaching her or in any way responsible for her academic performance, and as such your interaction with her will be as a graduate student to an undergraduate student, then fine. You can regard yourself as technically faculty if you like (which is rather unusual for TAs, btw) for only the duration of your teaching/marking responsibilities towards someone.

 

If you are marking her work, however, either now, or in the future, then it's a whole different matter, and you certainly shouldn't be in that position. Wait until the situation arises, however, and then simply have a word with the professor teaching the course, explain the situation and I'm sure s/he will be happy to mark just that one assignment. It goes without saying that in that situation, you should also not be discussing the course with her or helping her with her studies of the course outside of the classroom.