Getting out of limbo

[tattoobunnie]

It seems so strange to think of yourself as strong, and at the same time having a vice like being with your ex. My ex and I broke up two months ago, discussed trying to work things out over that time, get together every once in a while, clinging onto that idea. And with no action, only words on his end, I went into NC for a week, and it meant nothing as I saw him again last night. This time letting know it was the last time we would be together.

 

While he still stuck with, "I don't want someone new. I don't know what I want," and in confronting him that he doesn't want for us to get back together, he still cannot say yes or no. And he didn't want for things to be so final. But, his uncertainty is not enough for me to stay in this limbo. A mini-hell I've created for myself.

 

And its odd knowing what I want, which is not this, and yet still wishing to be by his side as I left him this morning after exchanging, "I love yous." And strange to know, I have never wanted someone so badly as I have him, yet choosing to give up and let him go. I know where to go from here, but all I want is for the minutes I am in his arms to stand still.

 

And even when you can get to the bottom of the issues...it still never is enough. "Love is never enough," one of things he said to me when we broke up.

[Fitchik]

tattoobunnie...

 

You could have been writing these words for me... I wish the best for you....and know you are not in your "mini-hell" alone.

[tattoobunnie]

Thanks! This site and the support on here is awesome

[waveseer]

I love being the type of person that's secure enough to let things develop on their own when it comes to relationships. It caused me great pain to realize that the relationship with my ex had gotten too deep for me to be so casual about it. It was the hardest thing I've ever done to walk away for my own sanity, and I've done some pretty hard things.