How to heal from your breakup (help for all)

[livingahippyfantasy]

That was good, thanks. I had to copy out a couple of the things you said to reread later.

 

Getting over a relationship is hard. I am trying to accept my breakup with a man I still think of as my ideal. I keep telling myself that good things are coming even though sometimes I feel like I am waiting for a train that was taken off the line without my knowing it.

 

Its difficult not to wish I could go back and change things but to just accept them as they are. I still love him deeply.

 

Do you agree that you often have to go through life pretending you are not feeling what you are really feeling. I was all those things, desperate, sad, clingy, angry and a puddle. I never want to be like that again.

[avman]

Do you agree that you often have to go through life pretending you are not feeling what you are really feeling. I was all those things, desperate, sad, clingy, angry and a puddle.

 

No, I dont agree with that. I don't think you should often have to pretend about your feelings. Yes once in awhile you have to "put on a good face" and not show emotions. But as soon as possible you should let things out. Its not healthy to be doing that a lot. It makes the emotions build and build. Eventually they just explode out and that can be a pretty scary event.

 

You have to be ok with your feelings. Don't fight them. Recognize that they are there and let them run their course. Its the best way to heal.

 

Now your ACTIONS are a different story. Sometimes you have to take actions that are totally contrary to your feelings (such as not contacting your ex - no matter how bad you want to). Thats the tough part. You need to do the tough thing sometimes in order to heal up in the long run.

 

avman