Signs that you're an emotional "crutch"

[martin6565]

Hello everyone...

 

I'm the dumper and want to get back with my girlfriend. (You don't know what you have till it's gone)

 

She was very much in love with me, and i really hurt her when we parted ways a few months ago. I try to be persistent, by setting up times to meet, texting, buying some surprises here and there. She seems receptive, but sometimes does not get back to me, or cancels plans. OK- GOOD that's fine, she has a life and its understood.

 

However...what are some signs you're falling into an emotional crutch? I'd like to know what to look for so i'm not stressing myself out and investing so much into a girl who's now just using me to move on.

[clean_slate]

Why did you break up with her?

[greywolf]

Hello everyone...

 

I'm the dumper and want to get back with my girlfriend. (You don't know what you have till it's gone)

 

She was very much in love with me, and i really hurt her when we parted ways a few months ago. I try to be persistent, by setting up times to meet, texting, buying some surprises here and there. She seems receptive, but sometimes does not get back to me, or cancels plans. OK- GOOD that's fine, she has a life and its understood.

 

However...what are some signs you're falling into an emotional crutch? I'd like to know what to look for so i'm not stressing myself out and investing so much into a girl who's now just using me to move on.

 

I'm going to be a little harsh here. You broke up with her. You should be proving to her that you will invest so much into getting back together with her. If you aren't willing to do that then I think she does need to move on.

[selkie]

dude if a person is either the Dumper or the Cheater (and totally in case of the latter) they can't EXPECT to be received well and with welcoming arms.

[deang]

ok I'm not going on the bash you bandwagon...I think that's uncalled for. I think you need to back off the gift giving, harassing behavior and set something up so you can talk to her and ask her to try things again and that you don't want to jump back into what you had but to start something new and take it slowly. That way your intentions are clear to her and if you take it slow then maybe she can let her guard down a little. I'd try that since whatever you are doing now isn't working too well.