Hey, when did I get better?

[Mishmash]

About a month or so ago I would turn into this emotional blob whenever I saw or talked to my stbx.

This morning he called and early this afternoon he stopped by. My only thoughts were 'good riddance' and 'leave now so you can go and chat with your internet g/f'.

 

I can't put my finger on it, but he just looks different, something about his eyes. It's creepy.

[SapphireNoir10]

Good for you. I severely dislike all men right now. Especially ones that run off with internet girlfriends. Your well shot of him

[hamsalad]

Armor! Your heart and mind have armored up and are now more resistant to the thoughts and feeling that would normally assault you and leave you in shreds.

 

It is very subtle, but I think it happens to us all over the course of time. The amount of time is always different for each of us, but it happens.

 

Glad you feel better.

[lostandhurt]

It's weired when that happens isn't it. Don't be fooled into thinking you are home free though. If you fall back a little into the dark place just know you won't fall near as far and it won't be quite as dark.

 

I am so happy to hear you are doing better. It is funny that they actually help us get better by their continued actions and thoughts. If they were suddenly nice and remorseful for what they had done I think it would be a lot harder to heal for us.

 

keep up the healing!

 

lost

[Mishmash]

I'll have to go out on a limb and say my warm, fuzzy feelings for him are over.

He's still so charming and his smooth talking could melt butter, but I'm not taking the bait anymore and let him tug at my heartstrings. I know it's all a farce and a head game with him...

 

He got himself into a predicament (financially) and wanted my sympathy and help. The call and visit was all about *him*.

For two months he hasn't spoken to his kids, hasn't seen them or asked about them. To him they don't exist. I don't exist. The past 20 years don't exist.

What a schmuck I was...

 

Sorry if this came accross as bitter, as I am, and have to work on that.

I don't care how he treats me, I just think he's dirtier than dirt how he treats these kids...

[Mishmash]

If you fall back a little into the dark place just know you won't fall near as far and it won't be quite as dark.

 

 

You're dead-on about that. Sometimes I do feel myself going to that place, but then I just give myself a reality-snap...