ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 The girl I been out with twice I'm in the process of asking for a 3rd date. But i just wish she can flirt back with me sometime. I remember on the first date I was complimenting her but didn't get one in return but that was fine. But this morning I sent her a email saying I didn;t sleep well because I didn;t hear her voice before I went to sleep and when she emailed me back she didn;t acknowledge that at all, just that I saw when you called me I was talking to my mom and then I fell asleep. And how she had a great memorial day weekend. i also told her I miss talking to her on the phone, and she didn't respond to that either. So what we have here is a situation where she does show interest in me because everytime I have emailed or called she replies back that day or the next. I just would like if she can do some flirting with me too so I can FEEL the interest. my last email to her was-"it was good you have a nice time in AC over the weekend, "I'm looking forward to having another nice time with you" So now I'm waiting for her to reply. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 yeah i admit that must be frustrating CD. I would feel that way too if i were progressing to date three. I would think he MUST like me a little to be going out for the third time and if i said something "cutesy" it would be nice to get something in return. A small "nugget" if you will. She just might have a straight forward personality. Doesn't mean she doesn't like you. Just wait it out and see how it goes. You obviously like her so crossing my fingers for you! I would suggest limiting the mushy stuff for now. It might be that this is so new she is in the evaluating stage. Keep it neutral. An occasional "can't wait to hear your voice" is ok. Don't do it much yet. Give it some time. I would assume she is just being cautious and evaluationg your potential as a serious dating partner. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Not everyone is comfortable with flirting. She could be on the shyer side. I wouldn't worry about it. Maybe over time she will come out of her shell. It does sound like she is indeed interested. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 that's a bit psycho on your part man. pick up the fricken phone and call. stop, STOP with the emails man. what is wrong with you? Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 that's a bit psycho on your part man. pick up the fricken phone and call. stop, STOP with the emails man. what is wrong with you? I CALLED LAST NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!. I said in my post I tried to put a flirty spin on the fact that I didn't get in touch with her by saying-"i did't get to hear your voice" and she said she was talking to her mom and then just fell alseep. So the call was made Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 I CALLED LAST NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!. I said in my post I tried to put a flirty spin on the fact that I didn't get in touch with her by saying-"i did't get to hear your voice" and she said she was talking to her mom and then just fell alseep. So the call was made that's STILL nutty to me man. Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 that's STILL nutty to me man. well I already told you I'm not good at dating just doing what feels right so you shouldn;t be surprised if something sounds stupid-lol Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 well I already told you I'm not good at dating just doing what feels right so you shouldn;t be surprised if something sounds stupid-lol i'm just telling you for next time. don't say stuff like that unless you have been dating a girl like a year and you are really into her. i dunno, maybe some random girl would like that, but it's kind of creepy if you ask me. i would never say that to a girl. Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 i'm just telling you for next time. don't say stuff like that unless you have been dating a girl like a year and you are really into her. i dunno, maybe some random girl would like that, but it's kind of creepy if you ask me. i would never say that to a girl. ok well give me some flirting tips that's ok for now? Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 ok well give me some flirting tips that's ok for now? i've told you flirting tips thousands of times. be humorous and make some jokes. make her laugh. don't hear a question and be all pouty face. and don't say off the wall weird stuff like that. it's all a learning experience man. Link to comment
Yates33 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 ok well give me some flirting tips that's ok o for now? I agree with Ghost. First off, you ARE NOT FLIRTING. You are just being a bit clingy. Telling her you couldn't sleep because you didn't hear her voice all after two dates? Bro, relax. Stop e-mailing her so much and learn how to flirt properly. Flirting doesn't = compliments, usually alot of compliments so early on means "butt kissing", girls don't like that. Flirting is about laughing, smiling and light teasing with underlying tones that say "I am into you" but not LITERALLY! I think what this girl is showing is that she is continuing to see you, because she was initially into you...but now you are probably scaring her off. So relax. Have you kissed her yet? Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 i've told you flirting tips thousands of times. be humorous and make some jokes. make her laugh. don't hear a question and be all pouty face. and don't say off the wall weird stuff like that. it's all a learning experience man. So say tomorrow I talk to her on the phone and she says-"so how are you? What if I say-"much better now That I'm talking to you" is that weird too? Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 I agree with Ghost. First off, you ARE NOT FLIRTING. You are just being a bit clingy. Telling her you couldn't sleep because you didn't hear her voice all after two dates? Bro, relax. Stop e-mailing her so much and learn how to flirt properly. Flirting doesn't = compliments, usually alot of compliments so early on means "butt kissing", girls don't like that. Flirting is about laughing, smiling and light teasing with underlying tones that say "I am into you" but not LITERALLY! I think what this girl is showing is that she is continuing to see you, because she was initially into you...but now you are probably scaring her off. So relax. Have you kissed her yet? No not yet, well it's better to feel stupid on here than have her make me feel like an idiot. thanks for the advice Link to comment
JadedStar Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 So say tomorrow I talk to her on the phone and she says-"so how are you? What if I say-"much better now That I'm talking to you" is that weird too? I think it is a bit soon for that CD. Wait until you have been going out with her longer to make sure she does not perceive this as clinginess. I would say it is great to hear from her but not the more intense statement of "much better now that i am talking to you". SOme women would like to hear that, even on third date, but she doesn't seem like the fuzzy wuzzy type or maybe she is but is being cautious. I'd wait for that kind of thing. Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 I think it is a bit soon for that CD. Wait until you have been going out with her longer to make sure she does not perceive this as clinginess. I would say it is great to hear from her but not the more intense statement of "much better now that i am talking to you". SOme women would like to hear that, even on third date, but she doesn't seem like the fuzzy wuzzy type or maybe she is but is being cautious. I'd wait for that kind of thing. see this is where I struggle, not knowing what to say or when to say it. Link to comment
Yates33 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 -"much better now That I'm talking to you" is that weird too? No...it's not weird....its FRIGGIN DESPERATE!! Like I told you before...THAT IS NOT FLIRTING. Why are you thinking about what to say when she asks you, "how are you" , you are being too needy and overanalytical....stop it. Link to comment
JadedStar Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 No...it's not weird....its FRIGGIN DESPERATE!! Like I told you before...THAT IS NOT FLIRTING. Why are you thinking about what to say when she asks you, "how are you" , you are being too needy and overanalytical....stop it. That is why he is here, looking for advice. He is asking for our opinion. No need to rough him up to this degree. He explained he isn't sure what to say and what not to say. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 While I agree it is definitely too soon to make statements like that, I still have to laugh when people don't have a problem sticking their tongue down somebody's throat or getting naked and having sex with them within 5 minutes of knowing each other but simply making a flirty statement of "feeling better now that I am talking to you" horrifies and shocks people and makes people think it is clingy!! Link to comment
Nixee Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 She seems like she might still be in an evaluate and take it slow sort of stage, whereas you seem to want to jump-start into a relationship with your comments. Honestly, I might react the same way she is if I started to go out on a couple dates with a guy right now and he acted the same way, simply because I know I'm not personally in the position to fully open up to someone in that way. Is it possible she has personal issues holding her back making her want to take things slow? That doesn't mean she won't be open to you... you just need to win her over.. .you can't expect her to just fall into things so easily... some people are extremely guarded and cautious, or they like to build up to that level of mushy talk... it is normal for a lot of girls I think. You need to spend more time just talking to her in a friendly manner.... ask her questions about who she is, what she is interested in, what makes her laugh, what makes her tick, what annoys her. Make her smile and laugh and you will get her defenses down, and the flirting will start to happen more naturally in time. Link to comment
15 Storeys High Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 CD - Just go with the flow of the conversation. Don't plan what to say. I thought you hated scripted conversations. You are coming accross as a little clingy rather than playful so instead of saying things like you have been do as ghost suggested and make a couple of jokes when the opportunity arises. Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 what do u mean by what makes her tick? I always heard that but never knew what it meant Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 CD - Just go with the flow of the conversation. Don't plan what to say. I thought you hated scripted conversations. You are coming accross as a little clingy rather than playful so instead of saying things like you have been do as ghost suggested and make a couple of jokes when the opportunity arises. i have no experience in being playful and not sure if I know how Link to comment
Nixee Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 what do u mean by what makes her tick? I always heard that but never knew what it meant I mean... what she is most passionate about... the subjects she prefers to talk about most. Music? Art? Travel? Books? Etc, etc? If you hit a subject that makes her face light up, ask more questions about it... people like to talk about themselves... let her talk about herself, take an interest in her, and it will pay off. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 So say tomorrow I talk to her on the phone and she says-"so how are you? What if I say-"much better now That I'm talking to you" is that weird too? you are trying to be sweet waaay too fast. just answer the question. 'i'm doing great. how did your day go?' or 'how are you doin?' Link to comment
ConfusedDater Posted May 28, 2008 Author Share Posted May 28, 2008 you are trying to be sweet waaay too fast. just answer the question. 'i'm doing great. how did your day go?' or 'how are you doin?' Well it's no secret that I have no game so that's why I'm asking Link to comment
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