soul_soother Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 I need some serious advice I am on bended knee's at this point. I'm currently 18 and my girlfriend is 16.. Everything was fine with us but, her mom started controlling my life extremely quick.. Saying how I couldn't see her daughter without good grades and no skipping school or being late for anything.. Her mother is quite controlling over everything. Anytime I would stay over there for longer then an hour her mom would go off about how She's not gonna have someone come in her house and wreck anything and how she struggled through life to raise her daughter... I haven't done anything! I'm such a neutral person I just do anything to please her nothing is good.. She yells at me so much and we've only been dating for almost 6 months. She went to the school as my "mother" and got grade reports.. This women is crazy and everyone even teachers around the school think she is.. She's a computer tech and found out all my passwords to myspace / hotmail and whatnot.. Problem is me and her daughter are soo happy but she ruins everything.. I leave in August for the Navy while she's attending high school.. Our plans are to stay together, I can do a long distance relationship but not without a proper relationship to start on.. Please any opinions or advice with this Link to comment
judyness Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Yes, you can go to the police. Then the police can tell you so your dating her 16 year old MINOR daughter. Hmm.. It is an invasion of privacy though. Maybe while your out in the Navy you will get your space and time away from this. In the mean time, there is no other family relative she could live with? Thats not very healthy for her own daughter to even live with her. If your going to write her letters, I suggest send them elsewhere, not to her moms house. Phone calls you may not get through if her mom picks up. So good luck, but her mom has issues only a professional could fix. Link to comment
soul_soother Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 Her father is a dead beat.. However in the state i live 16 is age of Consent but still under her mom's rule.. Just seems like no matter what I do I lose..Her sister and her boyfriend skipped a day of school and the boyfriend had to write a list of apology letters for him to be allowed back over.. It's to the point where I want to end the relationship because I can't take much of it Link to comment
judyness Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Oh, well thats good. I mean you should go to the policy over the privacy matters. Maybe since your going to be away, you should take a break? Maybe hide the relationship? Link to comment
soul_soother Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 Her mom is way too nosy and would def. find out.. She's not allowed to text after 9:30... every night at 9:29 we say g'night i love you and end of convo.. Cingular switched to AT&T which is East coast time so her record shows her texting at 1:30 am.. Her mom called me at the school and completely cussed me out saying how i was worthless and all i do is lie to her.. Then she called the cellphone company and they explained the time different and she calls back and says "Your lucky your a** is saved"... Link to comment
judyness Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Wow. Thats no way to live. If your relationship is strong it should hold up, but at the same time, this amount of stress on you may not be worth it. I think the best thing is listen to your instinct, to your mind, then to your heart. Maybe it would be best to take a break from each other. If a few years down the line, shes out of school, on her own and you two are single-- maybe you could try it again. You just met at the wrong time in your lives. Navy-- you don't want her mother jumping into your life. She may say things or try to pull something to get you kicked out. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Unfortunately, she is a minor living under her mothers roof so what her mother says, goes. No matter how much it sucks for you. Your best bet is to just respect the mothers wishes right now to make it easier on your gf and yourself. Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Navy-- you don't want her mother jumping into your life. She may say things or try to pull something to get you kicked out. if you're joining the navy, it's illegal for you to be dating this girl anyway. They have a strict rule against anyone in the military dating anyone under the age of 18. If caught, you could get into some serious trouble. Link to comment
judyness Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 if you're joining the navy, it's illegal for you to be dating this girl anyway. They have a strict rule against anyone in the military dating anyone under the age of 18. If caught, you could get into some serious trouble. Thanks for pointing that out! I don't know too much about the navy, but this girls mom can cause some SERIOUS trouble. Regardless of the state laws, hes going to be on the other side of the country, in a different state, different laws. (he mentioned eastern time?) Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 Military, no matter what branch it is, is really strict about anyone over the age of 18 dating anyone under the age of 18. Link to comment
soul_soother Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 I don't believe it is illegal to date.. only to act with? Seeming how I will be gone for 2 years she'll be 18 when I see her next.? Link to comment
judyness Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 I don't believe it is illegal to date.. only to act with? Seeming how I will be gone for 2 years she'll be 18 when I see her next.? Might as well take a break. Link to comment
soul_soother Posted March 3, 2008 Author Share Posted March 3, 2008 Thanks i believe i will take ur advice Link to comment
big greg Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 after you break up with the girl, just lure the mom somewhere and totally kick her ass.... lol J/K it would be funny to plant some drugs in her car late at night one night, and "anonymously" call her in so she gets busted for having drugs.. The momma can't be psycho on you if she's behind bars!! just kidding (sometimes I have a twisted sense of humor) Link to comment
judyness Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 after you break up with the girl, just lure the mom somewhere and totally kick her ass.... lol J/K it would be funny to plant some drugs in her car late at night one night, and "anonymously" call her in so she gets busted for having drugs.. The momma can't be psycho on you if she's behind bars!! just kidding (sometimes I have a twisted sense of humor) hmm i love that idea. why didnt i think of that!! Link to comment
Mythical_Suicide Posted March 3, 2008 Share Posted March 3, 2008 I don't believe it is illegal to date.. only to act with? It is illegal to date or have sex with. In the military, they don't care whether you're sexually active or not with someone under the age. You can get into trouble, they can't really decipher who is just "dating" and who is sleeping together so.. yeah.. Link to comment
3boys Posted March 4, 2008 Share Posted March 4, 2008 Your gfs mother has broken the law, plain and simple. Fraud, invasion of privacy, harassment. Unfortunately, by going to the police, she's only going to get worse because it's unlikely much will happen to her. Hate to say it, but I think about the only thing you can do is wait until your gf is 18. Just to warn you, she's NEVER going to get better. So, you need to decide if your gf is worth putting up with this woman's behavior for the rest of your life. I dealt with my ex's psycho mother until I decided I could not put up with her for the rest of my life so I ended my engagement. I found out that she also hates his current wife so I realize it wasn't necessarily me, she's just a hateful person. Link to comment
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