Fox1198 Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 Suppose the first time you meet your girlfriend, it was with a group of guys. However it seemed she had more chemistry with another guy, and not you. However, they never got together. Few months later you start dating this girl. Would it bother you that she never paid any attention to you during that first meeting, and that she paid more attention to another friend? Link to comment
Mavh25 Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 I always pop in your threads LOL sorry! But noooo. Not unless she was over the top with him and was REALLY into him. Thats something you should'nt worry about, she fell for you, was with YOU. I did'nt pay the slightest bit of attention to my current boyfriend when we first met, but I fell for him and now I see him as the most gorgeous guy ever. It would merely be the same as her talking to another guy in a club, and not you.. and then talking to you later on. If you get my drift, you probably just feel odd about it because it was a friend. Link to comment
d24 Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 the problem here isn't the question being asked. The question being asked here is: "am i justified being annoyed that my gf never paid attention to me the night we first met" the objective answer is no - she didn't know you and she was just spending time with her and your friends. did she have any idea she'd ever start anything up with any of them? no. so why punnish her for it? Am i allowed to say to my girlfriend "how dare you like my friend before we dated, before we knew eachother and before we even talked".... that's a bit crazy dude. In my opinion: Get over it, as long as your relationship is good, be happy you have her! Link to comment
Bunney Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 Why does it bother you? Obviously they didn't have enough chemistry, or else they would be together right now, right? It's no big deal and there's no reason to be annoyed at the fact that she didn't pay you a lot of attention. She doesn't have to be all over you the first time you meet. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 Suppose the first time you meet your girlfriend, it was with a group of guys. However it seemed she had more chemistry with another guy, and not you. However, they never got together. Few months later you start dating this girl. Would it bother you that she never paid any attention to you during that first meeting, and that she paid more attention to another friend? a little bit....no one want to be a second choice Link to comment
someguy88 Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 a little bit....no one want to be a second choice It would probably bother me a little bit too, but I'd never ever breathe a word of it. lol Even admitting to being just a little insecure can really turn off a woman. If you mention that it bothers you then she's going to remember. Chances are she'll think it bothers you more than it actually does and it'll kind of tarnish your manly image in her eyes. Sad, but true. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 mind you I would still be able to function as a mate.......but if I meet someone and then they want to date others after we date.......we have no future together as a couple. I would date them, but no future Link to comment
ghost69 Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 were you shunned? like not talked to at all? did they get really involved? who cares. she likes you now. i wouldn't do it though. lol Link to comment
wayoverit Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 I see this as another case of jealousy, insecurity, and lacking self-esteem. I always ask myself, am I strong enough to let the relationship go and take control of myself and my life, should she ever cheat or not love with me any more? The answer is always a YES! Link to comment
angelsoft Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 I don't see why it should matter, because in the end you're the one who ended up with her. So, you're the lucky charm. I wouldn't worry about it. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted February 28, 2008 Share Posted February 28, 2008 I don't see why it should matter, because in the end you're the one who ended up with her. So, you're the lucky charm. I wouldn't worry about it. i know how he feels. i think. almost like 2nd choice? pretty crummy feeling if you ask me. 'well it didn't work out with ____. so i guess you'll do.' Link to comment
Haven Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Suppose the first time you meet your girlfriend, it was with a group of guys. However it seemed she had more chemistry with another guy, and not you. However, they never got together. Few months later you start dating this girl. Would it bother you that she never paid any attention to you during that first meeting, and that she paid more attention to another friend? How long did she keep paying more attention to the other friend? If at the time you asked her out, she was still paying less attention to you, then perhaps that's a cause for concern. But if it was only that first meeting, then you shouldn't be worried/bothered at all. I had a similar situation, where this guy wanted to date me. When we'd first met, he started flirting with my female friend and completely ignored me. Months later when he asked me out, he was still doing the same thing. He only paid attention to me when she WASN'T there. Clearly, I rejected him. I'm guessing this can't be the case with you and your girlfriend, though, otherwise you wouldn't be dating her. And then another example -- I hardly paid attention to my current boyfriend back when I didn't know him yet. I would pay way more attention to other guys. As we started getting to know each other, though, it reversed, and I'd be paying attention to him and very little to other guys. So if that's the case with you, then I wouldn't worry about that first meeting. Link to comment
tsarevnaelena Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 a little bit....no one want to be a second choice Yes, but there really isn't any indication that he was second choice. He just said his gf seemed to have more chemistry with another friend. If the girl had gone out with the friend and then ended up with the OP, that's one thing, but it just seems like the girl seemed initially to be into one guy a little more than the others. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Yes, but there really isn't any indication that he was second choice. He just said his gf seemed to have more chemistry with another friend. If the girl had gone out with the friend and then ended up with the OP, that's one thing, but it just seems like the girl seemed initially to be into one guy a little more than the others. isn't that a lil bit like being second? Link to comment
tsarevnaelena Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 isn't that a lil bit like being second? Maybe in a sense. I'm not sure. To me, there needs to be a "barrier breach" to feel that way. I'm not saying that if I were in the same situation I would be thrilled with it, but the OP's first post is really vague. He even says she "seemed" to have more chemistry with the guy. That could've been him projecting or something. After all, nothing happened with the other guy and he's with the girl now, so maybe the "chemistry" he saw was something that didn't really exist, I'm not sure. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Maybe in a sense. I'm not sure. To me, there needs to be a "barrier breach" to feel that way. I'm not saying that if I were in the same situation I would be thrilled with it, but the OP's first post is really vague. He even says she "seemed" to have more chemistry with the guy. That could've been him projecting or something. After all, nothing happened with the other guy and he's with the girl now, so maybe the "chemistry" he saw was something that didn't really exist, I'm not sure. don't get me wrong, i don't hate silver medals and i would date the woman. your point is well taken. Grant wasn't Lincoln first choice either, Lee was Link to comment
tsarevnaelena Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 don't get me wrong, i don't hate silver medals and i would date the woman. your point is well taken. Grant wasn't Lincoln first choice either, Lee was Haha, touche! And Grant even came after the likes of Ambrose Burnside and Joe Hooker. I am going to Antietam this summer, by the way. To heck with G'burg. I'm really excited. I might even go down into Fredericksburg or Spotsylvania. I can't wait. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Haha, touche! And Grant even came after the likes of Ambrose Burnside and Joe Hooker. I am going to Antietam this summer, by the way. To heck with G'burg. I'm really excited. I might even go down into Fredericksburg or Spotsylvania. I can't wait. and Meade!!!I have been to all those places years ago.....enjoy Link to comment
.jpg.1626fbc48c04fd9021fd315819807524.thumb.jpg.882936eb5901fa05cf31c75617acde2e.jpg)
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.