soul_soother Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 So I've posted before about my problem with condoms.. I hate them for plenty of reasons.. -They are either too small or too big -They make funny noises when on (turnoff) -You can't feel anything at all...at..all... -It's complicated staying erected -It's complicated staying in the mood while getting one -And it numbs the penis Okay so basically agree or disagree as much as you like but in my opinion Foreplay is suppose to build up for better sex? Or at least get you going to the homerun the main goal of sex. So ya touching is fine, little more touching, some oral here and there, and bam sex! But, to me everything before isn't fun anymore because I know it's just leading up to nothing fun.. My girlfriend has a complete blast through all stages and she orgasm's a lot luckily i'm a fan of giving oral...She's not to great at giving it though.. Once the condom is on she might as well have tide rubber bands around it because I don't feel it exists. Position doesn't matter me on top, her on top nothing.. Condoms completely suck at life.. She's on the pill but refuses to have sex without a condom.. eventually sex just got so lame and completely nothing to look foreward too I flat out told her I didn't want to do anything sexual anymore. We've been dating 5 months now. It hurt her feelings because she thought I didn't like sex with her but I didn't want to seem like a * * * * * and force her to have sex without a condom. It really sucks because she's really into a lot of extremely hot things but it's never fun because condom's.. She's on the pill like I said but??? If nothing is fun for me at all why bother when most the time it's me doing all the work.. My previous relationship was 2 years, and we had sex without condoms the whole time...a year later try one without a condom for my gf's first time and i stay hard for like 2 minutes maybe.. Anyone think this is a good idea about the no sexual contact? Link to comment
Honesty Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 This 2 year relationship where you never used a condom.. Have you been checked for STDs since then? Link to comment
soul_soother Posted February 7, 2008 Author Share Posted February 7, 2008 Yes I have been checked twice.. I am STD free. completely clean and healthy Link to comment
Honesty Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 Have you shown her/offered to show her evidence of this? Has she ever expressed this as a concern? Link to comment
Angel_baby Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 Have you talked to her about wearing a female condom? You both can take turns wearing one... Or maybe you can get on birth control also. They make a pill for guys also. I understand that your female just wants to be careful about getting pregnant. TOTALLY understandable. But there are other means of a "back up" of birth control Link to comment
rose2summer Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 Condoms really are much safer, I think you need to find a way to psychologically convince yourself it's not that constraining. You cannot compare your past sexual experiences with your current. Hugs, Rose Link to comment
Jonboy582 Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 -They are either too small or too big -They make funny noises when on (turnoff) -You can't feel anything at all...at..all... -It's complicated staying erected -It's complicated staying in the mood while getting one -And it numbs the penisHave you tried durex avante I think its called they are not rubber and are thinner. And as for noises I never had any and no feeling I only experienced that with extra safe condoms. You ever tried getting extra thin ones? I know thats not really what you wanted but though I would just say it encase it might help. Jon Link to comment
v-neck Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 WHy don't you just get married and problem solved. Link to comment
EQD Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 yeah what are those.. diaphrams!! make her use a diaphram and spermicidal lube! then she can share your displeasure with the sex act... having to put it in and feel it and all.. but it solves all problems if she uses one and likes it. (or rather doesnt mind it.. Its a disk that she parks up in front of her cervix if i am not mistaken. viola. Link to comment
Lucy__lou Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 people on here may suggest a number of ways to avoid your problem with condom, like female condoms, or getting your girlfriend to back down on the condom thing, but what about the next girl, and the next? you can't rely on all future women you sleep with to be ok with no protection. And if you don't want to catch anything or become a daddy, you might want to get used to celibacy. Is that really what you want? To be a lonely old man? Regardless of whether or not you can get around wearing a condom, you should make an effort to re wire your brain so that you can learn to hate condoms less, and can get pleasure and orgasm in new ways. I'd say that your previous relationship where you didn't wear a condom may have trained your penis to only orgasm in a certain way. If you only enjoy sex that ends in unprotected intercourse, then maybe that's something you can work on. Learn to enjoy every part of sex. And communicate more with your girlfriend so that she knows how to give you oral in a way that gets you off properly. If you haven't tried every type of condom on the market, test out some more, and maybe even try masturbating in one to see if you can get more used to it. Also, put it on way before penetration so that it warms up and you get hard again. A lot of guys have hang ups and psychological blocks when it comes to condoms which are interpreted as physical and that they can't feel anything. maybe you're one of them, maybe you're not. But if your attitude is contributing to your going soft, then you'll improve your situation by improving your attitude. I have a theory, and I could be wrong, but I suspect a lot of guys who have hang ups with condoms because subconsciously they want to get the woman pregnant. It makes them feel more powerful. Link to comment
luckyyy Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 No, men think the opposite. If I was given the opportunity to have sex with a girl who wasn't on the pill, I would lose my erection lol. Link to comment
CaptainPlanet Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 If you haven't slept around, and you're sleeping with someone who hasn't slept around the chances of getting and STD are going to be very low. Get tested and if neither of you have anything there is no real need for condoms. This thread made me groan because I hate them too. Unfortunately I don't have girlfriends so any sex I am lucky enough to scavenge will most certainly involve the dreaded condoms which more or less equates to sex that doesn't work. Link to comment
someguy88 Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 I don't like condoms either, but what the hell were you thinking when you told your GF that you didn't want anything sexually from her? To me that sounds like a really manipulative and jerkish thing to do. If your issue with condoms is that bad then talk to her about it. Don't pretend that you've somehow spared her feelings by lying about why you don't want to have sex with her. Link to comment
soul_soother Posted February 7, 2008 Author Share Posted February 7, 2008 We have talked about this though.. She understands that I can't feel anything and she understands why I wouldn't want to...I didn't just lay it out that I didn't want to have sex just because, she understands it's because of the condom.. I'm not exactly sure how someone trains their penis to enjoy something? I've tried all sorts of condom's thin and what not.. As for the spermicide she doesn't feel it does anything to prevent pregnancy.. If I knew that this was the time I was going to get my girlfriend pregnant then no, I wouldn't have sex either.. And just because, your married doesn't mean your ready for children either... Link to comment
Jonboy582 Posted February 7, 2008 Share Posted February 7, 2008 And just because, your married doesn't mean your ready for children either...I could be wrong but I thought he was getting at when you get married you don't have sex anyway kind of joke. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted February 8, 2008 Share Posted February 8, 2008 As for the condom not feeling good: you can apply lube (KY Jelly for instance) on the inside tip of the condom before you slip it on. It's supposed to make it feel alot more better. Link to comment
Cardinal Posted February 9, 2008 Share Posted February 9, 2008 I don't like condoms either. They take too much of the physical pleasure away from intercourse. And it is a real pita staying hard. May not bother me, but constantly losing erections will get old for any girl after long enough. Cialis is definitely helpful for me when I am with a girl and need to use them (which is under most cases). Honestly, when I wear a condom, sex is mostly about pleasing her. I tend to be a giver so it works for me. I just don't expect to get a lot out it in the way of my own pleasure. Getting off is challenge enough, lol. No, men think the opposite. If I was given the opportunity to have sex with a girl who wasn't on the pill, I would lose my erection lol. Man you aren't the only one! Link to comment
sinnerboy Posted February 13, 2008 Share Posted February 13, 2008 hello, i dont have problems with condoms, but i think there is one condom that might work for you. its called crown and its pink, its used by the porno stars. really thin and strong, it almost feels like you are not wearing anything. i used trojan magnum befor but they suck comper to the crown. check out website link removed . the nice thing is they feel great and fit if you are larg or avrage. hope this helps Link to comment
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