I need some help...

[babydoll1984]

Okay so I've always known I was bi... my first sexual experiences were with females and I've always been okay with this... now almost 4 years after my first lesbian relationship and after going through many straight and gay relationships I have become severely aware that I am so much more attracted to women. I am currently seeing a woman who I adore, we've both decided to take things slow... that is something I've never done before. I get pretty bored easily and don't date people much longer than a month or two however I'm crazy about this woman (who's known for long relationships) and I don't see myself calling it quits anytime soon. Maybe it's the fact that I'm expecting to have this woman in my life for a long time, but never have I ever felt the need to face my sexuality. I've always just kinda gone with the flow but I'm coming to the realization that my attraction to men is dwindling and my feelings for women so much more fullfilling... and honestly I REALLY DON'T WANT TO BE GAY... okay well so I don't want to be gay, but if that's what I am then that's what I am but I feel like now I have to DO something about it, like come out of the closet (which I am so not ready for). I'm thinking my feelings for this woman are pushing my desire for it to be "ok" and for the people around me to accept it because I plan on staying with her for more than the amount of time it would take to get her drunk and sleep with her and no one finding out... I just want to be proud and loud and have everyone say OK!!! YOU GO GIRL!!! And it doesn't help the woman I am seeing is perfect perfect perfect... otherwise I'd get scared and run away... I sometimes feel that I do stupid shit to sabotage what I have so that I don't have to face my feelings... I just want to know that I'm not alone on this... please share your feelings

*ps she just called i gotta go*

 

- lost and confused

[Ash]

Well, I don't know you, and I'm not gay myself, but I'd say if it makes you happy, then it makes me happy too. It's your choice, nobody else's and I respect that. Not a thing wrong with it from my viewpoint.

 

You go girl! Go be with the one you care about.

[Guest]

I agree.

[swimchick03]

I think if it makes you happy, then you should definitely not deny yourself of a good relationship and your real identity. I'm not gay myself, but I think this would be best. Also, dont expect everyone to be accepting, b/c there are people out there that if they cant understand it they descriminate it. Also, the only type of gay people that I do mind being around are the ones that force their ways on you-make sure when you come out oyu do not come accross that way-then people will just get angry. I hope that your relationship works out for the best and good luck to you!!!

 

*Love*

SC

[babydoll1984]

thanks guys it's really good to know that i have support... and things could always be worse i suppose... i dunno i want to hear a couple of your stories though, about your love lives and especially if you're gay about the issues that you face day to day in your life and how you overcome them... i think i need a little inspiration....

 

-thanks y'all