How do you frame your conversations with a date to

[sarsapolis6]

incline that you want to have sex with her? Is there a such thing as mentioning topics that are supposed to get her into a certain frame of mind? I'm interested in learning how to gradually segue between the conversations you would have with your friends and co-workers to topics that are close to sex. I realize you can't simply ask "Do you want to have sex?" after a conversation about New Year parties.

 

I am going to have a coffee date with a woman this Sunday. She works in the store next door, and we both get off at 8. On my coffee date I will definetly ask her if she "has any plans tonight," but other than that I don't know how I'm going to seduce.

 

Is that enough or should I say something else? Compliments are no problem...but then again even guy friends give women compliments without expecting anything.

 

Thanks

[Nixee]

So ... first of all, is all you want from her sex? Or do you want her in other ways, but you just want to make sure she knows you want her on a sexual level too?

 

Because if you are hoping to just get sex out of a coffee date, you might be sorely disappointed. Some women are interested in that, but I think they are in the minority. Most women like to actually converse and connect with someone before deciding to go to physical level.

 

Personally, if I am ever out with a guy and I get the feeling from him that he is just trying to seduce me, it is usually a sure fire way to turn me off. We don't like to feel like objects.

[Dako]

I'm a guy, and I have no interest in sex without a relationship.

If you just want sex, establish that upfront so she's not fooled.

[mgirl]

Just be a man, have some integrity and ask her straight out.

 

If all you want is sex, then you might as well go home and masturbate.

 

If you have to manipulate a women in order to have sex then you are not truly connecting with another fellow human being. Hence, there is no use in having sex with somebody else. If you don't have somebody elses consent then that is close to date rape. If you want to get your rocks off, go home and masturbate, like what i suggested before.

 

If you don't want to connect with another human being, then you are sad. Don't manipulate for sex, it just isn't worth it... x

[greensleeves]

I would be very surprised if your coffee date is going to be interested in having sex with you when you ask her if she has plans later. Also, not a good idea to start talking sex with your co-workers...you've got to be careful there! Most women want to be wooed and aren't interested in just jumping in the sack. I agree with Nixee...if it feels like someones trying to just sexually seduce you, it's a major turn-off...they come accross as a lounge lizard type.

 

If what you want is a well-rounded and loving relationship with someone that will include sex, take it slow and it will come more naturally for you. You should never "expect" sex just because you've taken someone on a date.

 

There are women out there who are interested in one night stands with no strings, but trying that with a friend or co-worker will probably only lead to problems. If that's what you're looking for, start going to pick up bars. Learn to read body language (google it) but be careful and watch out for STDs.

[shygirl23]

For me, sex has never been something that happened on any of the first dates. It's more of a serious relationship thing. But I understand that everyone is different in this regard so...

 

Maybe wait until you've gone out a few more times. By then, you'll have a good idea of what she thinks about it (hopefully) and can just flat-out ask her.

 

Flirting and paying close attention to her reactions is always a good way to go, I guess. Just be careful about rushing things or it might get awkward and painful--fast.

 

If you're really intent on steering the conversation in that direction (and I'd advise against it on a coffee date), then the classic, "Hey, want to go to my/your place?" always gets the message accross, right? Keep in mind though, I wouldn't recommend saying that.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

ask her out... hold her hand... work up to a kiss.... there's lots of body language that leads up to it....

 

most women find it objectionable if you're crude or don't work up to it... very few women respond to the 'so you wanna have sex?' route...

 

if it's someone you really like and just go for that, you may ruin any real chances you have of dating her. so worry about dating first, then take it from there (and don't expect sex on the first date)...

[someguy88]

I don't see anything wrong with trying to turn a coffee date into sex. Everyone needs to get their rocks off.

 

Contrary to what one poster said, I don't think learning how to push all the right buttons is manipulation. Not everyone is out looking for a serious relationship.

 

Every person is different so there's no way of knowing how this girl you're meeting would respond to any sexual advances. Personally, if I find a woman attractive and I'm interested in her then I'm pretty forward with the flirting and sexual innuendo from the get go. What you don't want to do is misrepresent yourself or your intentions.

[ghost69]

you will only get sex if the girl was thinking it beforehand.