agualibre777 Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 I met this guy that I really really dig. We've just been dating for 1.5 weeks or so, but it's clear we both really like each other and he took four dates to kiss me and wants to wait for sex. I feel really good about this one-- definitely long term relationship material. Now before we started dating, I was in contact with this other guy for possible dating, but it was unclear what his intentions were and we haven't actually met, he emailed me on an online networking site, we both think we know each other from somewhere but don't know where... Anyways, he'd invited me to a party, but I never went, partly because I was just really tired that night and partly because I'm really into this guy. Anyways, he emailed me and asked me what I'm doing this weekend and I said I'm having a birthday party and said he could come. But now I'm wondering, should I tell him that I started dating someone? I just don't know what to do, this is kind of a mess... I'm not in a relationship with my guy specifically yet, but I think I will be so I want to do the right thing so this other guy won't be uncomfortable when he comes and sees I'm with him... Does that make sense? What do you think I should do? Link to comment
PeanutButter Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 tell him the truth or this guy your "dating" may dump you!! it could happen. just tell him, you know what i met someone else, but im open to being friends, thats why i invited you to the party, as friends. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 you started this post off how great you are getting along with this guy you know 'in person'. why not tell the email guy you met someone? go with the guy your gut tells you yes. but i think you already met someone and have seen them. the other guys is just in text. you don't have to tell either one of them you are seeing someone else. you aren't exclusive at all. Link to comment
angelmaria Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 I agree with PB 100%...things could get ugly if this 'other' guy thinks you are totally unattached hence the invitation...and the guy you are seeing might get angry...then you will be left with neither. Be honest... Link to comment
PeanutButter Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 I agree with PB 100%...things could get ugly if this 'other' guy thinks you are totally unattached hence the invitation...and the guy you are seeing might get angry...then you will be left with neither. Be honest... exactly, shes going to set herself up for disaster. wait, you never met this online person? meeting him for the first time at a party with a guy your currently into--not yet dating? or did you meet online guy? cuz i just sense trouble. Link to comment
Beec Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 I have no problem with the idea of you dating multiple people, provided there is not agreement on being exclusive. However, I would not at this time have both men at the same function or party. If you want the guy you have been dating, for 1.5 weeks, then leave the other guy out of the picture for the party. 1.5 weeks is not long enough for the guy to be secure enough to bring former interests around. And if it not exclusive, it will be awkward. Link to comment
PeanutButter Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 yeh serious, you want two guys hitting on you at the party? like one you want and such-- then some internet guy just trying to get at you? invite both to the party-- most likely you will end up with nothing. just tell internet guy, hey i met someone, i hope that doesn't upset you in any way but thats how i feel. so good luck. make sure to say he cant come to your party thing, not to be rude, but you can stay friends. its just not while your still starting fresh with someone you want, in the beginning. as well as if you never met internet guy in person, dont do it while your in front of a guy your interested in. what the? Link to comment
agualibre777 Posted September 27, 2007 Author Share Posted September 27, 2007 yeah, I was thinking when I invited the internet guy that well... I'm not technically exclusive, but really I WANT to be if everything continues to be as it has so.... But after I invited I thought about the awkwardness when he comes and meets me and my guy is there wondering what is up. Ugh. I wrote him and told the internet guy that I'm dating someone and while I'm technically single I'm not really available, and that he may not have had any dating intentions or anything but...... Do you think it's o.k. to uninvite the internet guy? Wouldn't that be rude? oh dear. Link to comment
PeanutButter Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 well you shouldn't have in the first place-- invited him. just tell him, that the guy your "dating" is coming to the party and it would be an uncomfortable situation if he came. that you wouldn't mind being friends, but right now is not the time and thats not the place to meet. Link to comment
agualibre777 Posted September 27, 2007 Author Share Posted September 27, 2007 1 you PB and everyone else. I feel silly for this for sure. I was thinking "i am still single and we can be friends" but it would be akward for everyone. I sent online guy an uninvite email and said I am really sorry. I didn't suggest another time to hang out, I figure the whole thing is so rude he will not really want to kick it with me probably. But it's all good, I really like this one a whole lot.......... Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 so your gut kicked in? good for you. Link to comment
PeanutButter Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 welcomes, good job!!!!!!!! Link to comment
annie24 Posted September 27, 2007 Share Posted September 27, 2007 How long were you talking with this guy whose intentions are unclear and just invited you to a party? If he just took too long to ask you out on a date, I'd forget him. He shouldn't have given you the chance to meet someone who swept you off your feet (which happened!) I'd say tread carefully with this new guy. You've only been dating for a week and a half, and have had sex. Do you know if you two are exclusive, or if he is sleeping with other women? Would that bother you, or are you ok with it? I'd have him take an STD test and figure out how you feel about exclusivity before you continue. that's just my gut though. good luck Link to comment
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