Women liking sex and sexy vs not?

[RedPenguin]

Ok, I come from a Christian background, well, not so much in the family but I was sent to summer camps where they were all basically Christian, and I've always heard you don't look at women in so called "inappropriate" ways.

 

Also, I have heard many women say men look at them for nothing but sex.

 

Is this all just a religion thing, because I have to laugh, because I noticed when I or other guys I've seen, if you look at a girl up and down, and smile, and let her know you want her, I don't always see the girl like, oh my god, another sex only guy, or something, I've seen so many girls enjoy it completely, looking back, flirting, showing it all off, so to speak.

 

So what's with all this, women don't like sex or hate men who only want sex? If so, then why do so many show everything off when guys are looking, acting like they are having the time of their lives? LoL. Also, for so many women hating sex, kinda odd how so many are often caught looking at your package, LoL. If they aren't thinking sex or hate sex, why look there, so they can cut it off so you never have an interest in sex anymore, LoL?

 

The reason I ask is, I've heard so many women say, all men want me for is sex, but yet, I don't normally have luck with women, unless I like them physically. I mean, when I'm excited, so to say about a girl, I always have way better luck in getting her, then if I just don't look at any part of her and try to not think of sex at all.

 

I've always never felt it is normal for a guy to look at women and never ever think of sex of any kind when he looks at a girl, like Christians seem to say, don't get me wrong, I don't want to sound anti-Christian, I just don't really believe the sex beliefs.

 

I also can't think of one guy I know, that looks of women, never thinks of sex, and really gets any female attention at all. I have a friend who talks to women all the time, but always about computers and stuff, never talks about sex or seems to think about it, and he always seems to bomb out with the ladies. Every time I see, I guess you can say "playa" or just at least someone who is good with the ladies, it always seems to be the guy who checks them out from top to bottom, which to me would go against the we hate guys who always think about sex, LoL. Also, I noticed if I look at a girl, only in a "nice" way, and don't really check her out, I don't normally get any attention from her, she just seems to say, not him, but if I look at a girl, checking her out, I always seem to get a smile from her and way more attention, and often a tease. Something tells me, girls don't mind sex, LoL.

 

So basically my question is, ladies, do you like a guy to look at you all over, looking like, girl, let's have all night together, or do you like that guy that is like, no sex thoughts at all for me, period. Like I said, I seem to have way better luck with thinking sex, not necessarily thinking dirty or perverted, so to say, but just admirer a girl all over, they seem to love it.

[Dako]

Sexuality is much more complex than simply the act of having sex.

Women and men express sexuality in subtle ways, and can gain social status among both sexes by appearing sexually desirable.

You probably know some real hunky guy that women swoon for. Some guys are even envious, right? And consider how women can admire how another woman can wear a certain style successfully.

[RedPenguin]

Hmmm, yeah because like I said, if I walk into a group of girls, and act like I just want to be their friends and or bf and never ever talk about sex at all, it's like I never get any attention, but if I walk into a group of girls, and start checking them out, knowing what I want and like, and just looking at one girl, with that look like damn girl, you are fine, and I would not mind at all talking you to a quiet place together, I have way better luck with the girls, and sometimes, it's almost as if the girls try to compete, and often they seem to show off when you are looking at them.

[CharLit]

You're mixing up a number of different issues and asking for people to give you an answer for ALL women. Women are all very different individuals. Some love to be looked up and down, others hate it. Some women love sex, others are completely indifferent about it, and everything else in between. I would imagine that in general the women who are checking out your 'package' are not the ones who are indifferent to sex, though even that may not always be true.

 

So, I'm not answering for "women" here. This is just what I think about it.

 

- When I'm walking down the street, all people can judge me by is my exterior. I'm not expecting anyone to look at me and think, "wow, she must have a really beautiful soul!". However, I do find the slow up and down look somewhat disrespectful, I am not a piece of meat, and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I tend to look away in irritation when that happens. However, I do like a flirty look that says "hey, I find you attractive", and that will be met with a smile.

 

- I'm in a committed relationship, but if I weren't, a committed relationship is what I would be looking for. thereforeee, guys who were only interested in sex with me wouldn't stand a chance. Though mutual attraction is obviously essential in considering someone's relationship potential, for me to want to go out with them they'd have to strike up a conversation with me and we'd have to click in that department, too. Just saying "you're hot" would earn only disdain.

[Dako]

It's not always intended to get you to have sex, but to feel desired.

Most men enjoy that sort of attention. It's just flirting.

[RedPenguin]

Yeah, when I look at a girl up and down, I don't really look and say, oh I want to throw her against the wall and rip all her clothes off, I do it as more of a how beautiful and perfect she seems. I mean, I just love curves and those that skinny women have. So I guess I look at women in more of an admiring way. Maybe that's why I don't really ever get slapped or get disgusted looks from pretty much any girl I look at.

[CharLit]

That's true, there are verrrrrry different ways of looking someone up and down. I was referring more to the creepy kind... there are certain looks and comments that you know are intended to make you feel uncomfortable rather than desirable.

 

Dako, I don't mean the looks are intended to actually get you into bed, but one of RPs questions was why women complain about men only wanting them for sex... and I was saying why I wouldn't be interested in that.

[Zackinlaw]

Of course girls like sex but most of them don't like being desired JUST for sex ... it objectifies them as nothing but a sex toy. When girls say "all that men are interested in is sex" they are really complaining that a lot of men they meet are looking to score and nothing more. That is, of course, a huge overstatement when applied to men in general.

 

What you have noticed in response to your showing sexual interest in a girl vs. not showing any is simply that you have found the middle ground: Girls like guys who are interested in them physically as long as that is not his ONLY interest.

 

Zack.

[Dako]

Dako, I don't mean the looks are intended to actually get you into bed, but one of RPs questions was why women complain about men only wanting them for sex... and I was saying why I wouldn't be interested in that.

 

As a non-ogler myself, I agree.

Wish I knew these things when I was 19.

[Dako]

Maybe you just have a charming, nonthreatening approach that works.

[Cimmie]

Both sexes are interested in sex. But overt or covert sexual display should be context specific.

 

For example, it is much more acceptable for a man to look you over at a social event or in a casual meeting where you are dressed up to the nines, rather than at a business meeting where you are wearing a suit, or at the swimming pool where you are not wearing much at all. In the former cases it would likely be welcome, in the latter it would be patronizing/creepy.

 

Learning the contexts in which it's possible to display attraction (in a light, fun way) or to flatter (gracefully) takes a bit of maturity and skill. Some people are better at it than others, but like most social skills, it can be learned if you are observant.

 

Most women LOVE flirtatious behaviour if it's in the right context (i.e. you are not trapped on a train or plane with someone).

[RedPenguin]

Oh, I see what you mean. Yeah, I always noticed that, like I or some other people can look at basically any girl all over and yet none ever seem to mind, but I see a fair amount of guys, that never have any luck at it, and almost seem like they are going to be slapped sometimes or the girl will get an eww look.

 

I guess that's why so many guys also get all the luck also, because I try to flirt with women as much as I can, within reason LoL, but I noticed almost all the guys I know, almost never flirt with girls, so I guess, some guys have the advantage if no other guy is even flirting with the girl.

[angeliamce]

Zack- You are totally right, "Girls like guys who are interested in them physically as long as that is not his ONLY interest." I want a guy that is wants me- but I want him to like me also.

 

 

I have been blown away lately by the fact that people actually have sex w/ people they don't even like, girls and guys. Yes- I like when a guy acts like they like my look- but, on the condition if I like something about the guy. If it is someone like a friend's husband, it makes me angry and uncomfortable- so basically I like for guys to look at me, but no one that is attached. Also, I must admit that sometimes it makes me mad when certain people make comments about me- its not the comments but the people I don't like. So, if girls like you when you flirt- they porbably like you anyway, but when you flirt they are comfortable sharing their feelings because they think you are into them also. So, who knows- have a great weekend.

[RedPenguin]

HeHe I guess it all has to do with flirting. I think that checkout out a girl and letting her see you do it, I think somehow breaks the ice, and bingo she knows you like her, so then she will either flirt or not, I think if you don't have any type of ice breaker, like I said, if you don't look at girls at all, it appears probably that you don't have any real interest in the girl.

 

I guess some guys can be liked by almost any girl, because I've seen guys who look at every girl in the room, and not a single one gets mad, they all seem to like it.

 

I think I must look at girls in a funny or cute way because I noticed girls get the giggles often when I look at them, not something other guys I know, other guys get either a slap or eww, * * * r u looking at?, LoL.

 

I think I realized that it is true that looks are not everything, because I know in my life, I was always nervous and never flirted and I got no girls at all basically, then all the sudden after High School, I just said the heck with it, no more being afraid, and I can't believe the response you get with girls by not being afraid.

 

I mean I always heard confidence was a big thing, but I never thought it was that big. I mean, not in a bragging way, I went to not even a single girl ever really looking at me, to actually having girls smile at me. I still have no girlfriend, but I'm busy in my life anyway, but I'm on the road to finding one.

 

I just can't believe how an attitude can make such a difference, if you would have told me, I would have one girl at all smile at me back in High School, I would have said, you nuts and lying, but now I can believe it.

 

I say this because I noticed many guys on this forum talking down about their looks and other stuff, thinking they can't get women at all. I don't feel I am a major hunk, I'm kinda on the chubby side, but trying to lose weight, for looks but mainly for health, and I just want muscle, I like to be fit, because I talk walks in the woods, and I found out being fit can even help you in the emergency room, to help you make it. All I did was change my personality and say, I'm going to look at these girls and let them know I'm looking and who cares if they all turn me down, I am not going to lose anything, and I can at least say I tried if I end up giving up, but unbelievably it worked, and it seems like even girls who would not even look at me back in the past now seem to be flirting with me, I don't mean to brag, but that sure was a confidence boost, but I got that feeling like, oh now you want me, LoL. Don't get that attitude, I'm just saying, LoL.

[RedPenguin]

Out of curiosity and speaking of sex and women, almost all girls that I have ever met except a very few, are not the types to just "give out" to anybody and usually the ones that do, are generally not ones that people say are hot, so how do they get so many pretty women, to dance seductive and sometimes nude around men, in a video that will be seen everywhere?

 

I'm just amazed, at even porn stars, because a fair amount are pretty, but it always seems like to me, that pretty much all the pretty women, usually don't "put out" like that, basically every pretty girl I've ever seen, you gotta be with her for a while before she would ever even give you the chance to do anything sexual, so how do they find all these women so easily it seems and they don't seem to have the same no-sex policy as it seems most pretty girls you see on the street?

[Leonhart]

Society's morality and that religion's morality are two VERY different creatures. They aren't even in the same stratosphere.

[CharLit]

I'm just amazed, at even porn stars, because a fair amount are pretty, but it always seems like to me, that pretty much all the pretty women, usually don't "put out" like that, basically every pretty girl I've ever seen, you gotta be with her for a while before she would ever even give you the chance to do anything sexual, so how do they find all these women so easily it seems and they don't seem to have the same no-sex policy as it seems most pretty girls you see on the street?

 

They're getting paid, hopefully large amounts of money. It's just work.

 

I'm very dedicated to my job, but I wouldn't be spending 50 hours+ per week behind a computer if I weren't getting paid for it!