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digitaldiva

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  1. digitaldiva
    20 days LC He's becoming a ghost to me. I can remember the good times and smile. I can also remember the bad times, but I'm starting resolve both situations. I look at my couch and imagine him there in a good way. Very similar to the way you see someone that is dead.
  2. digitaldiva
    Ok . I'm out of the NC challenge.
  3. digitaldiva
    It's so hard.........
  4. digitaldiva
    Day 1 I replied to his txt last night. He just asked what's up and I replied with a joke. He didn't reply back. Why does it make you feel worse when you respond? When he sends me a text I feel happy, but when I reply I feel like I lost my powers! I'm having some irrational thoughts. We are supposed to get a massage this weekend. If he says anything about the relationship, I plan on asking him if he just wants to take a break for the rest of this month, then try again in Dec. I don't want to bring up the entire relationship conversation, I just want to see if we can take a break for now then we will talk about the relationship later. What do you think?
  5. digitaldiva
    But I am afraid if I just cut off contact, too much time will pass between us and we won't be able to get back together!
  6. digitaldiva
    Day 3 Today, I am angry. One of the members of enotalone recently got back with her bf. I asked her how she did it. She said she started to work on herself and change the things he didn't like about her. She didn't tell him, but everytime she would see him, she'd make sure that he saw the changes. That sounded easy enough! Then, I started to think of all the things my ex said he didn't like about me and all the things that he said he wanted in his ideal girlfriend. It makes me feel humilated and angry. I don't think I could ever find the strength to be in his presense knowing how he feels about me unless he said he felt differently and was willing to work with me on us. How do we bridge that gap? I don't know and I'm not sure how much I care about that right now. I wish I wouldn't have seen him on his birthday. On that day I blocked it all out so that I could try to have a nice time. He must have thougtht I was an idiot. After all he's said and done to me, I'm still happy in his presense.
  7. digitaldiva
    Don't send the letter!!! When the time is right, discuss the breakup. But her emotions are still raw and she can't handle it right now.
  8. digitaldiva
    Day 2 ONE MORE REASON FOR NC...! PLEAS READ Funny thing. A lot of times the ex contacts you or wants to see you to make themselves feel better about hurting you. It doesn't really have anything to do with them trying to make you feel better. Then, after you give them that ego boost. Poof, they say thanks, then leave you again. It's a thin line trying to get an ex back. If you support them too much in their independence, they'll walk all over you while they get their ego stroked. You're just making them stronger and making them feel like it's okay that they treated you bad. When you go back to them before you healed you may not be able to defend yourself if they try to manipulate you. You'll be jumping through hoops before you know it. For example let's say you want your ex back but you aren't healed. They call you at 2am to come over but you have to work at 7am. Or, they call you out of the blue and ask if you want to see a movie, it starts in 15 minutes. Or they want you to come and hangout. When you get there they introduce you as the ex and then go to the bar to pickup other dates. You may agree to some of these things b/c you want to see them so bad. These are all extreme cases. I'm just saying that I've seen first hand (last Sunday) that it's harder to be strong and not wimpy around your EX when you haven't healed. Use every second you have to build yourself up so that when you do see them you will feel confident, secure and sure of yourself. If you don't try and build yourself up, when you do see them or talk to them again, your mind will start to race, stomach will get queasy and you'll want to do or say anything to be back with them. You're like a boxer training before your big day! Although we will not box our exes!! We'll love 100% while keeping our dignity and self-respect.
  9. digitaldiva
    Day 1 We just had dinner yesterday. It was his b.day and anniversary. I didn't expect to see him at all. It was the first time in 2weeks we'd seen each other. Seeing him made me feel great. I wonder if it provided closure or if I will want to see him again in a week or so...
  10. digitaldiva
    Why are you allowing her to do this to you? Call the cops or a friend to intervene... 90% of the way people treat you is how you allow them to treat you. She's doing it to you, because you let her do it to you.
  11. digitaldiva
  12. digitaldiva
    I'm so sorry you're going through this. Virtual Hug! Sending a letter is the same as calling him and talking to him about the relationship. It's too much for him right now. It's not that he just doesn't care. He can't deal with the stresses of the relationship right now. He'll call sooner or later. And when he does make yourself be cheery and sound happy if you want to take the call.
  13. digitaldiva
    Back to Day 1 Today is my ex's birthday and our 1 year anniversary. We haven't seen each other since the break (2 weeks). We've been in LC. I didn't plan on seeing him today. I was just going to send a little "happy b.day" text and keep it moving. He called today and asked if he could come and pick me up for lunch. He also said that he had something for me! I couldn't say no. I wanted to see him so bad. I wore something nice and agreed to join him. It wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be. All of that tension that we used to have when we were together, wasn't really there. We talked, laughed and had a nice time. He was much more sad than I thought he would be. He hadn't really told any of his friends about the breakup. He said overall, he was having a hard time. I didn't talk about the relationship and kept things nice and cheery. He made future plans for us as well. He gave me a shell bracelet that he picked up while he was out of town. He purchased it after the breakup. Back to LC.
  14. digitaldiva
    Back to Day1 I answered an unknown number yesterday and it was my ex. He was calling to tell me that he lost his cell phone and see what was going on with me. I don't think it counts since I didn't know who the call was from! I was so glad to hear from him though... It was so great talking to him.
  15. digitaldiva
    This is how I feel.....
  16. digitaldiva
    Day 2 of NC I come to enotalone as well as link removed to write down all of my emotions daily. So many times when we get into a new course of life we forget. I don't want to go through this again. There were many red flags and I completely ignored them. My emotions change every few minutes. One second I'm upset with him, the next myself, then I want to get back together, then I don't.... I'm writing down every emotion and making sure I'm also not lying to myself about anything.
  17. digitaldiva
    We had 9 days of NC then, he contacted me on Tuesday after the funeral (his friend died in a horrific accident). I called him back on Wednesday. He hasn't me called back and I'm not going to call him. So, we've been in NC now for 2 days now. Man, you guys really put the screws to me. I would feel so guilty if I just called in out of the blue.
  18. digitaldiva
    You know exactly why someone wants to get back together after a breakup. You have had the same thing happen to you. You've posted the same things I've posted. A lot of us would like to get back with our exes. Why are you being a jerk?
  19. digitaldiva
  20. digitaldiva
    I want to call and ask if he wants to go to dinner!!! Should I be in the reconciliation forum instead of this one?
  21. digitaldiva
    His birthday is Sunday should I call or should I send a txt message?
  22. digitaldiva
    Day 10 now back to day 2 I feel like someone that I thought once cared about me, just threw me out with the trash. No not even threw me out with the trash because it takes effort to bag trash. They just tossed me out the window into an alley. I'm not even sure I want to get back together at this point, but how could someone that once cared for you just not care anymore and not want to see you ever again and mean it? Now I am jumping to conclusions. I don't know if he ever wants to see me again or not but it sure feels like he doesn't.
  23. digitaldiva
  24. digitaldiva
    Day 9 now back to Day 1 I called him... That was really hard. I tried to be strong, and sound happy but I was so nervous!! I should have waited until I got off work today. Maybe I wouldn't have been so nervous by then. Or maybe I would have, who can say.
  25. digitaldiva
    Day 9 Ok Ok!! sigh, I'm going to call...
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