danq

I'm sorry AndyW, but I think you're being petty and vindictive by not responding to her. NC is about allowing yourself to heal, and possibly getting your ex back if that's what you want. It's not about getting revenge. If you've really gotten over your ex and don't want her back, you should be man enough to tell her and let her get over you. And don't be insensitive about it. Tell her you still think she's a great girl, but you can't just forgive her and take her back.

There are specific issues she mentioned that I could show her I'm working on. But she said she needs time away from the relationship, so if I email her, I hesitate to talk about our relationship.

I want to stay with her, no question about it. Like I said, we've had no dramatic problems, the relationship has been wonderful for the most part. Only lately, I think I'd been neglecting her, for reasons that I'm working on now. And I think that because of that, and the difficulty of being long distance, she started to become unhappy in our relationship. But we can work on that...

She hasn't officially dumped me yet, and I don't know how close she is with this guy right now. She may not have even told him her feelings, and she may be spending time alone trying to figure out how she feels. She said she's confused. Or she may already be in a full on relationship with the other guy, and all this talk about confusion, still loving me, and there still being a chance, may just be her attempt at softening the breakup. At this point, I really have no idea.

My girlfriend and I have been seeing eachother for 1.5 years (she is 22, I am 24), and have been in a long distance relationship for most of that time. There have been no dramatic problems, but the other day she told me (by email) that lately she felt like maybe we aren't right for eachother, and that she now has feelings for someone else. She said we might stay together, but she needs time off from our relationship first. The day she told me this, obviously I was in bad shape. I love her more than anything in the world and can't imagine living without her. I tried not to seem too upset, but it was obvious that I was badly hurt, and I told her to email me if she wanted to talk, and not to call me (that day, I would probably have broken down). It's now been a few days, and we haven't talked to eachother. I want to tell her that I'm doing well and have been working to improve aspects of my life other than our relationship. But I can't do that if she, only remembering my being broken and depressed, decides to end our relationship and says so in an email. And the fact that she is with someone else makes it seem more likely that she'll decide to break things off without really talking to me first. If she calls, it at least gives me a chance to tell her how I'm doing first. So I'm wondering if I should write her a short email telling her that I'm doing well and not to worry about me, and that she is welcome to call me, not email me, when she's ready. Thoughts? Edit: By the way, she says she still loves me very much. But she may just be saying that to make me feel better.