bunnylove

This guy is showing you who he is OVER AND OVER. I dont really think your listening to him. He lies to you constantly, telling you he didnt tell you he went to the bar because he didnt want you to worry (come on, seriously????), and then the strippers, and the college girls "come over my roomates gone", Do you think they played scrabble? I understand loving him a lot investing 4 years. Why not make it worse and invest 10 more? Throw a couple kids in there too. Im not trying to cut you down i just think you should get out now, free your fabulous self from that garbage and go out with the gals and hang out with your family until your ready to date again. Yeah itll hurt and youll be sad, for a while, but once you get past that and see clearly, you wont even believe that you stayed with him that long (honestly, you wont). I think he had a great old time at college with the chicks he hooked up with, and hes having a great old time at the bars with other women while your at home thinking hes at home. And he still has you, old faithful to fall back on if he doesnt score. He knows exactly what hes doing and knows what he can get away with, because your taking it and staying with him. i suggest reading "Its called a breakup because its broken.". Helped me when i went through the same kinda stuff. He sounds like my ex who told me that the reason there was less condoms in his drawer was because he used them to masturbate.

First off your husband shouldnt be talking to ANY woman like that. No matter how he knew her, how long he knew her for, even if he was MARRIED to her before. Especially someone who he had sex with numerous times and who wanted to marry him when she found out he married you. She should not be in his life if that is their behavior towards each other. It is completely inappropriate to talk to someone like that when your married. And from what you said he has said other dirty things. They shouldnt be talking dirty over emails, phone, fax, telegram, in person, ANYTHING. And even though he is a "forward" person, he knows what hes saying and doing. There is a time and a place for that kind of talk and that is with his wife. I do believe that flirting is human nature but when it gets sexual or dirty then something else is going on.Especially if it affects your partner, then that is not normal flirting. How would he feel if you emailed someone and commented on their "hot * * * *?" And the fact that you confronted him on it and he LIED and said no, thats a red flag. If theres nothing funny going on, then why lie? I was in a similar situation, and you know what, I MADE that fake profile and i messaged him and he fell for it. And you know what? I did NOT like what i saw, but i finally found out the truth. In my particular situation, there was no other way for me to find out (guys buddies do not tell the girlfriends anything!) And then i confronted him on it (he couldnt lie about that!!!!) After some counselling we came to some agreements. No exes of any kinds (theres plenty of women to be friends with-let the people you had sex with go). No dirty talking (get that from your partner like you should). And he was dumfounded that i was in his email, and i was scared like you that he would be mad. But honestly, in the end, i caught him doing stuff. And the fact that he did get upset didnt even matter because what he did was way worse, and in the end he saw that. And another approach i did, was talk to him about concerns i had and then i asked him to SHOW me his email/phone bill to calm my nerves. So some more truth came out then (if theres nothing to hide then why HIDE IT?). Anyhow after some counselling, we now have each others passwords, we can check text messages or phone bills at any time. And youll get to the point that you wont NEED to check all that stuff. I guess if sharing everything, or talking about everything, or if he isnt willing to give up his dirty talk (he has a brain he CAN do it!!!!) or if hes not willing to say goodbye to that girl (which he should because shes affecting your relationship) then maybe its time for some help or to reconsider.

i was the same way. still have some trouble with it. But your worrying over nothing. If people really thought you were that awful, then they wouldnt talk to you. And you have to just tell yourself that this is you, people will accept you for who you are (and there are people out there who wont, just like you wouldnt for some either) but you have to think WHO CARES!!!!!!!!Who gives a rats * * * if people talk about you. you cant live in fear of socializing just becuase your scared of what people think, trust me thats an awful way to live. So talk away!!! itll get easier the more you do it. i found that the quieter i got, the less i got invited out because i wouldnt participate in conversations, so i was like a bump on the log. Thats when i started to realize, i have a RIGHT to speak, to tell my opinions, to tell about real experiences. And some people like them, and some people dont. thats just life. And try not to stretch the truth, sooner or later your going to forget what version you tell people and it will come back and bite you in the * * *.....and reverrse the situation (this helps). EVERYTIME you interact with someone do you judge everything they say and put them down? of course not. So why would they. I think your feelings have to be resolved from within, and then that feeling of acceptance from others will come. otherwise it doesnt matter who you meet youll just think the same thing, you need to learn to accept yourself first. And maybe just because its a different state it feels foreign to you. I dont think the people are necessary different. Anyhow this is just some stuff i had to tell myself because i was that way as well. (was to the point i wouldnt say ANYTHING). And to not compare yourself to others, your you.