confused25

Although I do question your ex-bf's intention on doing such a thing . . . but then again, I think ur current bf deserves it! Don't listen to his bs . . . he's just trying to manipulate you into thinking that it's your fault . . .

Ask her if she'd like to grab coffee or a snack after class one day and see what she says . . .

I used to smoke but quit about 1.5 years ago. But my cardio is about the same before and after I quit.

I'm the only person out of my circle of friends that workout regularly. I try to go at least 2 times a week for an hour doing kickboxing cardio class. Sometimes I'll switch things up and do a weight training class. I had a trainer for about a year but then I got rid of him after our contract was up, plus it was costing me a fortune. Anyways, I've been going to the gym regularly for about two years now, and all of my friends assume that I am really in shape and athletic. I am 5'4" and about 121 lbs, which is about average in my opinion. I don't think I am in shape at all! I don't have a lot of endurance, and I can't run a full mile without stopping a couple of times in between. I just have really bad cardio. Why is it that even though I workout regulary, I am still out of shape?? I felt like I am wasting my time at the gym!

Have you used Proactiv? I have friends that tried it and it really cleared up their face and complexion . . .

I think my only setback is that I have astigmatism, and I've heard that the procedure may not be suitable for all candidates with astigmatism. I just had an eye exam done for contacts not too long ago and I casually brought up about the LASIK idea to my optometrist and he actually said that I may have a chance since the procedure now is so much more advanced than when it first came out. I guess I will have to see what they say during the consultation. I've also heard that for some people they were able to see 20/20 afterwards, but some people, even with the procedure done, they still may not have 20/20 vision so they might still need some sort of light prescription glasses or contacts to correct their vision.

Has anyone on this forum ever gotten the procedure done before? Or maybe has a friend or family member that had it done? If so, do you guys mind sharing your experiences? Were you please with the results? Did you have any complications? I've been thinking about it for a while now and I am seriously considering having it done in the near future. For those of you with 20/20 vision, I envy you! You guys have no idea what it feels like to wake up everyday in the morning and not being able to see a thing! I'm gonna start doing some research for potential doctors and maybe try to set up a consultation with them.

I heard good things about eharmony cuz one of my friends met her current bf through the site. I thought about trying it myself and even filled out the questionaire. The only thing keeping me back from actually activating my account is the expensive membership fee.

LostInMyThoughts - do you mind sharing your experiences with eharmony? Did they really give you good matches??? I'm curious to hear . . .

First thing to do -- sign off your aim! You have no business being on there! You can live without it. And try to stay away from home as much as possible. When my ex broke up with me two months ago, I was devasted. I'd always be sitting beside my laptop or phone waiting for him to im, email, call or text me. But you know what? that never happened! Now I'm just trying to focus on myself, keeping myself busy so that I won't have time to even think about him. I try to stay away from being alone by going out with friends, going to the gym, or even go shopping. Trust me, it works. I am finding myself thinking about him less and less, and I've stopped crying at night.

Wait, so is this your boyfriend or not?

It all depends on how close you are with you friend. I'd prolly want to talk to my friend about it first to make sure that he's ok with you dating the girl. You don't want to risk losing a good friend over a girl.

My best friend and I used to like the same guy but I backed off because I knew she liked him more than I liked him. But it ended up being that he was more interested in me. My friend found out about it and actually approached me first to tell me that I should go for the guy instead. She doesn't want to see us not get together on the account of her, since she knew that we were both interested in each other. I ended up going out with the guy for about two years and broke up a year ago. All three of us are still good friends til this day and sometimes we'd bring it up and laugh about it.

Well how often did you guys see each other? I'd talk with her first and see if she's willing to work things out with you and give the relationship another shot. Let her know that you're willing to change and let things start fresh and see what she says.

Although contact is contact, I think texting is less invasive. It's kind of like saying hello, asking a question, or just saying how we feel, but it gives them a chance to digest and choose to respond or not.

 

I am just as guilty with my ex. I text more than I call. We also used to text each other all the time during our relationship. That may make a difference too...

I agree with terk2021! I broke my NC by emailing my ex because I had too many things I wanted to say and it'd be hard to do it with texting.

I've never tried it, but it all depends on what you want to do with your body. I believe pilates is good for strength training for your core and toning, but does little for weight loss. If you want to lose weight you probably want to stick with other types of exercises.

I wouldn't recommend using foundation either if you had problems with acne. For me, I just use concealer on my problem spots and cover it up with a light compact powder. My concealer of choice is Maquicomplet from Lancome and my compact is from MAC.

Sorry to hear about your breakup! Looks like we're on the same boat! I was in your shoes about a month ago when my ex broke up with me out of the blue. He was my first love and I was devasted! I knew that nothing I could do or say would make him come back to me because he had his mind made up. I cried EVERYDAY for two weeks straight! I am just now starting to feel a little bit better . . . I've been crying less, and have been starting to feel less angry and bitter about the breakup. The only advice I can give you is to keep yourself busy and fight the urge to contact him. I've been hanging out with my friends a lot and that helped me take my mind of things. I also find talking about the breakup with my friends to be helpful. It will be tough at the beginning, but trust me, it will get better . . .

Hmmm to me it's when someone does little things for you without you asking.

Hmmm aren't we a lil toooo old for hickies? lol That's so high schoolish!

When that happened to me, I had to put on tons of concealer and then wore a turtleneck for the whole week!

I used to take Hydroxycut maybe 6 years ago for about a year or two and lost a lot of weight from it. But then again, it was back when they still had ephedra in the pills so that made it really effective. The pills always made me feel sick afterwards though. I'd get lightheaded, felt like throwing up, or my heart would be racing. I stopped taking them after FDA banned ephedra and they came out with a new formula without ephedra which made it less effective. I ended up gaining all my weight back within a year after I stopped taking them. I also tried out Trimspa and that was a waste of money. It didn't suppress my appetite at all and I didn't see any results. It gave me the same side effects as Hydroxycut but not as severe. That was about 3 or 4 years ago. I joined a gym about two years ago and have lost a good amount of weight since then and got more toned. My eating habbits haven't changed much but I've been able to stablize my weight. So the moral of the story? Save all that money you will be spending on the diet pills every month and join the gym instead. It's the only healthy and safe way to maintain your weight. You can crash diet and take as much of those pills as you want, but sooner or later you'll gain all that weight back and you're back at square one.

Hard to tell . . . either she is not her friend and really hates her, OR I think she's interested in you and was jealous to hear that you were going to ask the other girl out.

Ok, I posted a while ago on this problem and now I'm back again . . .

Some background:

So I've been hanging out with this girl I knew from college a while back and she's really close with her brother so he comes out and hangs out with us a lot. He asked for my number when we had a group lunch a while back. I didn't really think too much into it because at that time I thought he just wanted contact info since we hang out a lot.

So the issue is . . . now he won't stop calling me! It started out fine at first cuz he would just call to chat and see if I wanted to have dinner or hang out. But then we'd always be hanging out in a group (me, him, my friend and some of her other friends). Anyways, now it's more like he would call me without my friend knowing and see if I wanna hang out with him. I personally don't feel comfortable just hanging out with him alone because I didn't want him to get the wrong idea. And I haven't done anything to lead him on. Every time he calls I'd always make up some excuse to get out of it. But I don't think he gets the hint! He has called me every single day this week! He called me last nite to have dinner but I didn't pick up. Then later on he sent me a text implying that he was gonna show up at my footsteps uninvited with some takeout (he knows where I live). I freaked out and sent him a text saying that I'm not gonna go anywhere and I rather spend the night alone. Right after the text was sent out he immediately called me and basically pleaded me to have dinner and hang out with him. And once again I made some excuse to get out of it. So now this whole situation is making me not even want to hang out with my friend anymore because I know that he'd try to tag along too and that would just make me feel even more uncomfortable. Oh, did I mention that he has mentioned that he might try to join the same gym as me???

I know some people might say to give the guy a chance . . . but honestly I'm just not attracted to him, plus I just got out of a LT relationship about a month ago. And even if so, the whole obsessive calling thing is just a major turn-off for me, plus he's just starting to creep me out . . .

What should I do? Should I just tell the brother straight up that I don't feel comfortable hanging out with him alone and that he should stop calling me? And should I tell my friend about it? This is a tough situation here because I'm worried that my friend is going to end up getting stuck in the middle . . .

Scout - lol you really are trying to convince me to give the guy a chance huh? JK

I would say that he's a pretty smart guy with a decent and stable job and we share some common interests. But! I really really feel horrible about saying this, but I think I'm just not that attracted to him physically either. I really don't want to sound shallow but I think that you would have to be somewhat attracted to someone's looks as well no? I know people will say that personality is more important but I think that there should be a healthy balance.

Let me ask you something...because you say he's a really nice guy...are you absolutely sure there's no chance you would ever be interested in him? A few dates might actually change your perspective. You never know!

I know for sure that I won't be interested! I think he's nice in a way that I can picture him being a really good and caring friend. But I just don't feel that chemistry with him. Like I don't get that anxious feeling when I know that I'm going to see him. It's just different than what I've experienced in the past. Plus he's my friend's brother! I just think that things might get messy if things don't end up working out in the end.

He probably got the wrong idea thinking that you might also be interested in getting back with him. If you have no interest in that, then initiate NC with him and let him try to move on.

One of my friends is really close with her older brother so quite often he would tag along with us when we hang out. I'm starting to get this feeling that her brother might have a crush on me. He asked for my number not too long ago when we were all having brunch. I gave it to him as a friendly gesture, being that we are always hanging out together. Anyways, the other day he actually called me and asked if I wanted to have dinner with him. It didn't sound like my friend was coming along either. Although I felt a bit awkard about going with him, I ended up saying yes because I felt bad. Well luckily, my friend was online at the time and she imed me with some random comments about something. So I told her that her brother had just called and we made plans to have dinner. I ended up asking her if she wanted to come and she said yes (and she didn't know that he had called). So we all ended up going out to dinner together. Later on when I got home he sent me a text saying that he had a great time and he hopes that we can do it again sometime. So is he interested? or is he just being nice? I feel bad because he really is a very nice guy, but I'm just not attracted to him that way. And knowing me, I know I wouldn't feel comfortable hanging out with just him in the future. So the question is, what should I do or say the next time he invites me out?