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Oh, another big thing....he has a bunch of "girlfriends" on the internet that he sneaks and chats with. I check his email box at his work. He doesn't know I do that. It seems that he is being "faithful" to me..but still, I think he feels he needs to talk with these other women and keep them as friends for security reasons. He has even had one of the single women send a Christmas card to his work address and make it out to just him. I was left out. I have been jealous in the past, but a good reason. I'm just not that jealous anymore because of the way he treats me.

I didn't know much before we got married...actually, I was pretty stupid to jump into it before we spent physical time together. His ex-wife had mentioned about the control thing. He knows that I want the sex...so wouldn't you know that be the thing that he withholds from me! We've had problems from the beginning of the marriage. It seems we spent 3 weeks living together before the ceremony...and things were great in that area...sex was great. But as soon as we got married and after a month, he started playing his little game. Maybe I'm too much for him to handle. I'm 34 and he's almost 40. I wouldn't think that would make much of a difference though. A

Yes, I'm here! He does get excited when he hugs me and all, but then if I try to initiate something, he says "stop it" or shoves my hand away or just acts like he doesn't want me to touch him....ever. This happens every time. I have stopped trying. My mom told me to not pursue at all. That's what I'm doing...but it kills me inside that I can't be with my husband intimately. He feels more like a room-mate. I know it's bad because I've been dreaming (when I sleep that is) about making love to him. But it's all a dream. A Oh yeah, I actually got in touch with his ex-wife!! She said she left him because he was child-like and they had intimacy problems too. I wish I would've known this before I married the guy.

What is some form of ED mean?

Thanks to everyone who replied to my post! Funny how you know something inside yourself, but hearing it from someone else...well, it just puts a new twist on things. Thanks for all of the profound wisdom. You people are really smart!! hehe. I think you all missed your calling as professional counselors. But thank you for being a servant on the board and sharing your advice with me. Love you, bless you, hugs to all!! A

You really want the pain to end? Follow this direction. Step foot into an Assembly of God church on Wed. night. I promise you will be healed. I will be praying for you directly today, tomorrow, and Wed. Please write me and let me know your testimony. email removed I love you Brother. A

Have you asked him to get some counseling? either with or without you? Also, can you talk to him about this problem? If that's the only reason why you'd leave him, I'm thinking it's not a good enough reason. He can work through this issue if he wants to get help. Pray for him also!! If you want more..email me at email removed A

I need some advice! My husband of 10 years left me a few years ago. After that happened, I was matchmade with another guy (my now husband). We spoke over the phone for 9 months, and without seeing me he proposed to me. I was swept off my feet. I moved up here to get married and we've now been married for 1 and 1/2 years. I am miserable! He is so not my type and I'm not his type. We both believe in commitment and staying married, but we are really both very unhappy. He emotionally abuses me by "working me up" and then walking out and not fulfilling me sexually. This makes me angry and resentful..and then he gets turned off sexually completely because of my attitude. It's like a catch-22. I feel guilty with having feelings of wanting to leave because he was married several years ago to a woman that left him after 1 and 1/2 years. That's exactly the time NOW that I'm wanting to get out...or escape. My husband and I have not had sex in over a month. Aren't we supposed to still be newlyweds? Actually he pushed me away after 1 month of marriage. Now granted, I've gained some extra weight since we've been married, but he pushed me away when I was smaller too. He has gained weight too. I just wanted to clear that up here because most people tell me it's a weight thing. I'm not buying it! It's deeper than that. I just need some advice on what I should do. Should I stay or leave? Thanks for reading this. A