coollady1957

Hi shorty. I am sorry to hear of everything your fiancé is having to go through with his recovery.

I understand your difficulty trying to deal with his grumpy moods. I am certain that this is normal for him or anyone dealing with all that he has had to go through.

I will keep you both in my thoughts and prayers and wishing you both the strength to get through this.

I don't blame you at all Ren for just keeping Abby at home with you and comforting her in your own way until the end. I have done this several times with cats that I have had.

I had a cat that had feline leukemia once before. The vet said that she was not suffering in a bad way, but that there was nothing that could be done but to watch her and keep her comfortable. I have held several of my cats and hugged them, stroked them and snuggled them until their last breath.

Sometimes putting them to sleep seems so cold and depressing. You are a great "momma" to your piggies. Abby will sense your love and comfort and if she could speak I know she would say I love you.

I fully understand how much you must love your pigs. I feel the same way about my cats. No matter what, we become attached to them and they are such a big part of our lives. Yet to some people that seems silly and they do not understand our love for our pets and how much they mean to us.

I like the idea you have about having Abby cremated since burying her at your parents seems like it could be a big hassle with your mom.

Ren, I am very sorry to hear about your little guinea pig. I can understand how hard it is to lose a pet. I have been through the loss of several cats over the last 30 years or so. The knowing there is nothing that can be done is overwhelming. IF you do not want to take her in to be put to sleep, then just continue to hold her in your lap, love her and comfort her. Again, I am very sorry to hear that Abbys end is probably quite close. You are in my thoughts. hugs to you and Abby,,, take care...... Coollady1957

In your case if this was one of those crappy kind of break ups, then I would not send any birthday wishes. Sounds like you two had a rocky relationship with the arguing and name calling that he did. I think I would let this day pass without a word to him about his birthday.

If this was an amicable parting of ways, and not a lot of hard feelings and animosities, then I feel it would be ok to send a birthday wish to him.

However , I agree with DaDancingPsych , in that if you think this may cause a problem or any sort of future hopes of getting back together , or painful memories,then in that case I wouldn't send anything.

Just keep us posted on how you are coming along with this.

Lol ok, I guess I was unclear. I CALLED her on Tuesday, not texted. I left a voicemail, and she has not responded. .

No you weren't , it was clear that you had called her on Tuesday and not texted that time.

billy69 I am sorry to hear of your loss as well. I can certainly relate in some way , as I lost my husband not quite three years ago. I have seen first hand what the loss did my my children whom were 17 and 22 yrs old at the time.

I guess the most recent thing for me that turned me off was the fact that the guy seemed too desperate. After seeing him on the second date, he was all about the " I LOVE YOU's and calling me "baby" and " sweetie pooh" . I would say being just too gung- ho too quickly and clingy/needy is a big turn off for me.

I am glad you went on and had it checked out. Hopefully things will clear up for you ASAP !

Why do girls do that, I just don't understand it.. it seems like she just kind of led him on.

Kind of sounds like it. However, some guys as well as girls do that same thing.

Thanks for posting that. I feel certain it will be of assistance to quite a lot of teens in need.

On tuesday I called and left a message that sort of said call me if you get this.

He did say that he called and left a message, so she obviously didn't answer.

I think if you are sure you are texting and calling the right number and she has not responded yet,,, then I wouldn't call or text anymore. That is just my opinion on what I would do if it were me.

That is a first for me to hear of someone taking AlkaSeltzer for UTI's. Definitely though if you start feeling it come back, go ahead to the doctor ,which you have already stated that you will.

Maverick, did you go to the doctors and if so what did they tell you ? Just wanted to check in and see how you were.

and hurt myself

^

When and if you come back, maybe you could go back over to your original thread and give us the whole story, when you can type a bit more clearly. Then maybe we can offer you some constructive advice and thoughts.

I am totally confused. I wish you would relax, and give us some detail to what is actually going on.

There is not much advice that I can offer that has not already been said. I urge you to think about the replies you have been given. You are much to young to bring a baby into this world under the circumstances you have described. There is so much you need to do with your life before bringing a child into your life. Listen to what everyone is saying to you and check out those helplines.

Based on what you have said I don't think limited contact would be a bad thing if you feel comfortable with that. As you said, if it starts to feel negatively in the LC then you can always go back full NC. Definitely put yourself first and concentrate on what seems to work best for you . You seem to be using a level headed approach as long as you keep your self first a this point . NC or even LC ,doesn't work for everyone, and you certainly will have to take the course that feels best for you .

The tears are acceptable and normal. I think in some way the tears allow us to rid ourselves of some of the emotion.

I can understand your sadness. We all grieve, heal and move on at different levels when we part with people in our lives. I truly understand the missing what you feel was your best friend in addition to her being your girlfriend.

It is good that you both realized that your relationship was not healthy and that for the sake of you both that you needed to move on.

Are you going to continue talking to her, or do you plan to go back to no contact? What do you feel is best on the contact, so that you can continue to heal and move on ?

The healing process is a difficult thing. We have ups and downs where we feel as though we are on a roller coaster of emotions.

But then, there is the promise of a new life, with new memories and new laughter apart from the pain I am leaving...***sigh***

That line above from your other post is great advice from within yourself. You have the right idea. Keep moving on. You have great promise for a better future and life to come.

I think you should go ahead and help the mom return the books. Then I would NOT visit her in jail. Best I can tell she got herself into this situation.

If I were you I would continue to keep NC and move on with your life. If she has to serve several months in jail ,then so be it. Maybe this will be an eye opener for her and a way for her to finally get her act together.

Don't look at is as she is sitting there rotting. If she spend time there in jail then it is because she needs to be there to serve her time for her unpaid fines and is of her own doing.

Let her family take care of what needs she may have while in jail. Keep your life moving in a positive direction for your own sake and well being.

Sounds as though you are moving on quite well and dealing with the parting ways with this girl. No doubt there will be mixed emotions or unclear feelings during the healing process.

Sure seems you are on the right track. Keep moving forward. You are right ,sometimes it is just a day by day or minute by minute thing with learning to accept, deal with and move forward little by litttle. Good luck.

Definitely leave this guy alone. He is married with a wife and kids . He is obviously just looking for a good time and a roll in the sack. Have you stopped to think about how many other females he might having a hot time with besides you ? I seriously doubt this is a first time or one time thing with him.

Do NOT try to be " just friends" with this guy. This is a situation where you need to move on and forget this man and let it be. You do not need to be involved with a married man , or anyone that is a cheater.

You should be with someone that you can have a real relationship with and not with someone that isn't available to you. Move on , you are playing with a serious situation if you continue to see him.

Good for you for going ahead and filing your statement with the police. Just be careful and aware of your surroundings and be prepared with that pepper spray.