Smile4me

I would have to agree with Miss Cannuck and hold off asking him till you have more of an idea of what is going on. If you ask now he will just tell you its a work colleague etc and make you out to be in the wrong for not trusting him. There is no harm in bringing up the subject if intimacy as this has become an issue in your relationship separate from the issue if the new woman calling him. Look at his actions they speak louder than words. Has he got a new hobby? Is he working late more often? Are you spending less time together giving him a chance to be able to have n affair? what actions are you going to take to try to find out what is going on with him?

DONOT and i repeat DONOT try to make this now into a drug rape because you are not getting anywhere with your drunk rape accusations. This could end up costing a man his life (if not jail, many men who are accused of something like this end up committing suicide because they cannot deal with the accusation). You are merely using these excuses to justify your cheating!!! Firstly you actually wanted to be single so you could sleep with this man (by your own admission in previous posts). Secondly you were so keen to admit your feelings to him knowing full well he felt the same so what did you expect to happen following this? Thirdly he did not physically pour the drink down your neck and you willingly went there and got drunk knowing what would happen. Fourthly you repeatedly kept going back and drinking with him knowing that you would end up sleeping together. If you really felt remorse you would have avoided that situation again at all costs. Finally now you know that the grass isnt greener you want to be able to provide your bf with an excuse for your immoral behaviour and therefore you are trying to remove the blame from yourself by saying it was rape. No court in this land will ever believe you were raped when you kept going back and repeating the situation. It is now common that girls who cry rape can be trialled and sent to prison. Any woman in the land who has been rape suffer such horrific trauma that they would never repeat those actions again. You are making an absolute mockery and belittling the actions and trauma that women who have truly been raped suffer. This boy needs to know the truth about the girl he was dating if only to highlight the massive bullet he dodged when choosing to leave. This affair will come out in the end it always does. But be fair to everyone involved and own up to your mistakes and treat it as the affair that it was, not all of this made up excuses to shift the blame from yourself because at the end of the day you are only making yourself look a hell of a lot worse.

All credit to you for approaching this forum and the issue as a couple. I think this kind of relationship would only work if you had both lost your sex drive. It would be very difficult for a partner who has a high sex drive to give it up forever. I have to agree with others that if you truly want to stay together i think you need to explore the reasons behind your partners lack of sex drive and other issues you may have within your relationship. The other posters have given some excellent advise and avenues to explore for why this is happening and i don't think i could add any further advice on that. What i would like to say is that as a single female dabbling in dating apps i come across many men who are looking for casual hookups because they are not getting any at home (i will never sleep with a married man) thought i would add that before people jump to conclusions. i will never be a marriage wrecker. But whether you take that as an inclination that you are not alone in this situation or the fact that many couples find it impossible to commit to a sexless relationship when one person still wants sex (im just highlighting a bit of reality). I also have many men approach me for sex stating that their wives know they are looking for hookups because their wife is not able to give them what they want. (I also dont agree to them either). im just after a normal single guy to date a normal single girl believe it or not. (the dating world is harsh they days haha). But my point being that rarely does it work and both partners are happy. Its a massive ask to expect someone to go without the love and intimacy that sex brings to a relationship not to mention the pleasure. Have you a plan on how you are going to show your partner love and desire? Also have you a plan on how your partner is going to be able to fulfil his sexual needs?

This is not about you or your intentions, this is his jealously and control coming out. If you got rid of the albums it would be something new next week. I would keep the albums and get rid of the partner.

Your GF is using you to try and make the other girl jealous. Drop her now and stop being a pawn in her game. There is no other logical reason for why this girl would want to be alone camping with her unless she had an ulterior motive.

Oh no anon I really feel for you. It is super hard starting a new nursing career especially so soon after a break up. You are struggling more than likely because of the high stress of the role and when your you come home you are finding it difficult to switch off from the job as you no longer have anyone to talk your worries through with. Even if a partner has no idea what your job entails a listening and sympathetic ear is what you need to be able to wind down after a busy stressful day. But you are not yet ready for a new relationship so maybe you have a supportive friend or one of your old class buddies to talk the day through with. Both of you could each hash out your work days. please don’t be too harsh on yourself this is a very stressful time for you. Don’t make unrealistic plans as they may be overwhelming and remember to be kind to yourself, pamper yourself. If you feel like you are tired and need a lazy day do just that and you will find your feet once again.

It sounds as though your mum is very unhappy an is missing something in her life. Often people drink to block out their emotions and then it casually becomes the norm. Like they are unable to be themselves without a drink, they can’t have fun without a drink and they even reward themselves by having a drink. Unless she wants to help herself there is very little you can do to help her. She needs to understand the reasons for why she is drinking to be able to deal with it. Alcohol is the most addictive but readily available substances that a person can abuse. When you think about it no-one ever asks a person why they are drinking but everyone seems to ask a person who is drinking soft drinks why they are not drinking. It’s become a social norm so it’s very hard to quit.

You have not cursed their relationship, they have done that to themselves. They will never have trust in their relationship because they both know what either of them are capable of. I have a few friends who have gotten together with their partners through the act of cheating and I watch as their relationship falls apart or continues to be toxic due to how they got together on the first place. Count yourself lucky you never ended up married with kids

Tbf I thought this was a joke I post. you chose to date her and probably fell for her looks whilst wearing these clothes, you can’t expect her to change now you have her. She is not your possession in which you can tell her how to act, dress or think now that she is in a relationship with you. She is her own person an should remain so doing what she wants to do and living how she sees fit. I think if you did give her your little speech it is more likely to highlight a bunch of red flags in her that may well Make her dump you faster than diahorrea if she has an sense. also by ending it with the fact you know she will be your wife because you love her so much sounds creepy, manipulative and ver possessive. I suggest that you look upon yourself and your own insecurities as to why you would need to tell your partner how to dress especially when she has never cheated before. If you can’t trust your partner you should not be with her. It’s not only detrimental For your own mental Health but hers as well.