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thanks a lot you guys! again wish me luck i'll be talking to her later on around 10ish when she gets off work. so i am going to do some much need practice on what to say... gotta stay focus... keep my simple and most of all stay cool!

well i gotta do what i gotta do then! all iam worried about is how to bring it up and just start from there...what a way to start a weekend.... well wish me luck! thank you guys esp. iceman and marijo for you guy's support 10hrs till the big showdown!

i really don't know what to do! i don't want to lose this girl! this issue isn't that big of a deal is it.....? coz as long as she stays loyal and doesn't betray my trust by cheating then it should be ok right? like i mean she only talks to them and it stops there. i think i can live with that.... btw one more thing i hate/dislike confrontation with women.. i feel so weak, feels like i can't defend myself. iam really sorry guys IAM really hopeless! i love her so much, she means the world to me and i don't want....to lose her...she all that i got! (sniff sniff)

Thx for all of you guy's input on this situation that I have. Rest assure that I will rectify this issue tonight with her after her work. I am getting tired of this especially on what happened last night. Long story. Let's just say she was talking to this guy again. And to answer the question you asked. My answer is no coz I know it's not right and proper. I don't even talk to my old friends that are girls anymore let alone a complete stranger. I just hate putting restrictions on her coz I think her ex gave her so much that she rebelled and finally got fed up so she split. Ohh yea another thing yes she's had a few relationship under her belt. But I just hope you are wrong about her taking advantage of my inexperience. I'll keep you guys posted on the out come this weekend. sorry to this i have but! i still don't know how to bring this up and i don't like upsetting. the least i want to do is push her back by pointing out his thing that could be a big deal to most and such a little thing to her... not even significant. so to be honest with you guys iam still 70/30 on talking to her about it. 70no and 30yes.... iam hopeless!!

Now I am really torn! I don't know what to do I don't want to make a really big deal out of this... or is this really a big deal. sure enough you have a great and valid point ice but fact of the matter is, she told me face to face before that they are just talking that's all. But once again I did see this particular guy flirting with my gf asking her to go out and kiss and stuffs like that on msn while they were chatting. However, my gf didn't mind the guy's comments and just let it go. So could be nothing? Now I really don't know what to do. The last thing I wanna do is give my gf restrictions on what to do and what not to do coz what I said before its human nature, I am pretty sure you guys can say the same. If something is forbidden then you are more likely to do it just coz you are not allowed to. Again I stand.. actually sitting down not knowing what to do. I love my baby so much!

Again thanks for the many advice. Point well taken from all. I guess from all of you guy's respond I can apply it to my situation but of course all cases are different in their own way with their own little twist and whats hidden behind the surface. So with all of the things brought up in this thread I can finally decipher on what to do. And here it is: -in respect to my gf, I will hold off till after this week coz of her school work and work..(my baby is pretty stressed) and this is the last thing she wants right now -I will just simply ask why she's doing such things and leave as that. (reason) I respect her and trust her. By her doing this doesn't really disrespects me but me putting this to fuel my jealousy. -compromise she can talk to guys as long as I know them no more "new" guys from the net. (foot down) This way both will be happy trust was never questioned and respect for one another is restored. most of all, I will stop feeling so weak and insecure, I have to be a man and just show how much I love her and how much she means to me, and that I am really committed into this relationship.

point well taken!! just out of curiosity... did you even give your ex a chance to explain her actions? or you just plain old just told her its over. thats pretty bad way of messing up an almost 2yr relationship (her not you).. sorry to hear that. can't blame you for doing what you did, eigther or she didn't do anything. thx again.......

not my advise but from my friends before, anyways 2 things. do you live in the same area? do you want to meet her eventually? what i know is that you oviously like her. i wonder if the feeling is mutual? here is the advise don't wait to long coz if you do, then you will end up to be just a "friend" thats it. so act quick yet carefully. good luck

should i at least confront her about this and re-state : "that you are now with me, iam your bf and why do you feel the need to speak and talk to guys that you don't know and just happen to just talk online... a single person does this no a girl involve in a serious relationship." but iam just worried that this would be about the trust thing again and that if i give her so much restrictions like this one then she will be more inclinded to do otherwise.. i think its just human nature to do what you are not suppose to do... also she will say that shes just talking with them and she said its not like shes going to meet them up or something. "just chatting" just wondering iceman you said you had many relationship.. how long was the longest and how long was the last one? not that iam questioning your motives just wondering.

thank you for all of you guy's reply and post. unfortunately, your advise came too late and i already did it out of plain old stupidity. luckily she just took it as it is and nothing bad happened. we just talked it out and it became a trust issue and we both said our relationship is based on trust and we should always talk if anything bothers us and that we can work things out all the time. and sure enough we worked things out after that. for all the pple that saw this post please check out my other post coz it relates to this one some how... but keep in mind that this post is resolved and a new one just came up. once again thanks a lot for helping this noob!

aren't you a little taking this over board now! leaving her is the last thing that i would wanna do. i love this girl!!!! but you do have a point about why she finds the need to talk to other guys if she has me and about her giving them her number! but she claims that its not a big deal, she said its not like she likes them and stuffs. she also added that they are just talking thats all. also the trust things is questioned here again and if i hassel her about it then that means to her that i don't trust her.....? honestly iam getting confussed here some ppl say this some ppl say that i just don't get it.

no they were not talking before. and of course i give her lots and lots of attention. btw, thanks for the posts!! but still i DON'T know what to do... is it a) just let if be and if anything should happen (good forbid) just pick up and leave. b) realize that this relationship or any other relationship is based on trust and that i should trust her and being jealouse would only do harm than good.

what should i do! well here is the low down. like i said before iam the jealouse type and that iam pretty insecure and lastly i have low selfesteem. i know its a pretty bad combo in a relationship built on trust but then again considering that this is my first and only relationship and iam already 24 and iam madly inlove with this girl, i just can't lose my baby!! anyways, about my situation - my gf likes to chat online whenever she goes online especially latenights coz thats when she can actually go online coz of work and school. with that in mind, she mostly chats with guys online, guys that she doesn't know and guys that just msg her. so my problem is this... most of these so called guys she said are just guys that she happens to chat with online. iam like "fine" so she talks to them right and me being the jealouse type and all watches (she lets me btw) but this one time lastnight i saw this one guy (she talks to him almost everynight online and sometimes they exchange txt msg on their phones) said something along the lines of "come watch a movie with me, how come you don't ask me to eat out and lastly give me a kiss first then i will tell you" and all times my gf just didn't respond to his msg and just kept talking about random stuffs. prolly because she knows iam there. so i told her "this guy likes you and is hitting on you" in my head what the hell his practically trying to smooth talk his way in. but i kept it cool didn't let it bother me in front of her at least coz me and my gf had this talk before about this things online are not a big deal! (well to her at least, coz i don't even talk to other girls at all besides co-workers) btw this guy is local so he can easily visit my gf at work or you know make an effort to see her. iam going crazy here! i haven't been getting enought sleep at night coz i wait for her to sleep and she can stay up till 4-5am and i wake up at 7ish to got to be at work by 830. anyways to keep a long story short, what do i do with this/these guys online that hit on my gf. btw i asked her if these guys know that she is with me and she said "yes" but i wonder why are these guys talking like that to her and asking her for a kisses and such? i don't get it! what should i do? i need help! a real noobie in the relationship thingie!! sorry for the long post! please help anyone?

A little background info. Been together now for 10-11months now but officially BF/GF for about less than half of that. We both love eachother, she left her ex for me. Question: "Should I bring this up with my GF tonight?" This is pretty much what I would start out with and follow it up with a series of questions to my GF. "Iam going out on a limb here! Please excuss me for what Iam about to say. -I have some concerns that I would like to talk to you about. I am doing this because I know that communication is very importand in any relationship. And of course most important, trust and with that I start. First, of all I would like to say that I am the jealous type, because of the ovious. I don't want to lose you to another and I have a very low selfesteem. Second, I often jump into conclusion about things. With that in mind...I would like to ask and clarify some things with you. -For a girl with a BF you sure do talk to a lot of guys.... I can take guy friends(guys that I know and her old guy friends excluding ex's) but guys that you just meet and talk to online bothers me. I wonder if these guys that you talk to know that you are taken and that you have a BF. -Are you looking around still thats why you are doing this. -Would you sleep around or have you already did? and if you are would you finally tell me. (I am scared because after all you did sleep with me while you were with your BF at that time, your ex now.) In short, I am feeling very insecure especially when you talk to guys online and you tell them where you are from and work. I fear that something might happen while I am not there. Ever since I found some "hairs" in the back seat of the car. I guess ultimatly what I am asking you is that are you going to cheat on me or did you already cheat on me?" This is what I am going to bring up and say when majority tells me to. A little help or advice from you guys would help.