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i think the reason why i cut is because for all my life i have either been bullied, abused or unable to speak my own mind. Some time ago i started having viscious anger outbursts when something really stupid happens, because i bottle everything up and have no1 to talk to about my problems. So i find when i cut myself it feels i get a temporary numness than a boiling feeling inside my stomach of anger and sadness also it feels a way of releasing it temporary otherwise i keep getting viscous. i guess thats the reason why i do cut. i suppose it would help if i could speak to someone but there is no1 personal to talk to.

how ya gonna do it? i need some pointers

would you able to name these "people" that love me?

whoa 2 inches, thats like half as thick as my wrist.

hi people i know i aint posted on here in a long time, but i was amazed at the amount of people that have actually veiwed this topic, OVER 1000! probably make it a sticky on adbvice on suiscide since there is so much helpful comments here lol. well, i know all you people have been trying to help. but im still going to do it. i feel more empty than when i first set up this topic and i dont think words or advice will really help. there is one thing in my life though, one thing that i feal is mine which is my job, as i feel i can help people and im constinatly surronded by people and feal secure. but since im only training this will be gone soon as my training ends on july 27th but there is a job vacany coming up so wish me luck, i didnt get the last one coz of my age and experiencve sooooooo, dont know what else to say, not much in my life to talk about. ah, i do have a question though someone mentioned dont cut wrists (although i do this anyway and i thoguht it wouldnt hurt much) so any other options? dont wonna jump coz i dont want to make it to public that i killed myself, erm....any ideas? (+ guns are illegal in UK and itll be ahrd to smuggle in a 12 guage shoty) cant say when i can post back, im making a website. itll be launched soon. Ill be going through the prosess of buying the domain, itll be link removed and itll be launched on 29th july on my last day if you want to have a look. the internet is my life so why not post my life on the net? anyway best be going cya laterz and best wishes in your life p.s dont cock your life up like i did thanks for all your help. Toggle

hi again, people on here suggest things about religion? well i dont have a religion, or a faith, but i do believe in fate. so isnt it fate that i feel these ways and that i want to end my life? also, u wanted to know y i want to end my life now, at 16, and on my 17th birthday? well, the reason is, is that at my age of 17 i am going to have a lot of things expected of me, aswell with the problems i have now, and these things i dont think i can go through alone. And i was born on that day, so why not die on it?

i know tyhnx for the advise, but y wont no1 gimmie the answers i want? ARGGH goddamit

hello guys, im back sorry i aint been replying in a long time, ive had more thigns on my mind, i dindt get the job, because i am to "young" and not much "experience" "sigh" there aint much hope left in my life, i think im gonna go soon, i want to thank you all for all your help, its weird that words cannot descirbe a persons feelings, and words can not make a remedy. all i want in life, is someone close, that i can tlak to, spend time with and have fun. why does someone get everythign, and anotyher person in life has nothing? well bye everyone, id say i got about 2 weeks left. well bye, dont know if ill reply again, but b4 i go i got something to pass onto you guys. Bye

i think he is dead.......

hi again for the past 2 or 3 days i have got really down again, the slightest thing makes me feel how crap my life is. i dont think i can go on much longer, i dont think i can even make it to my 17th. sorry guys the end is near with love toggle

thanks abcd, is ok if i pm if i want to talk to someone anytime? i got my interview on the thursday next week and ill give u enws on the friday or summit on how it went

thank you abcd i listen to music while i walk and some of the songs i can feel as though i can relate to them, or that may sound really weird but i got good news, I GOT AN INTERVIEW!! its in the same place im working at the moment. i guess what dont help with my "depression" as people say i got in here is the fact i work with hundreds of children like this everyday as i work in social services, what do u think?

There is not really much i can do. I feel as though i have been separated for so long from ppl i have lost all my charisma and life. im not a kind of person that enjoys going to a nightclub every friday night, getting drunk ect. i prefer to stay in, but unfortunately the worlds society has terrible judgments about ppl like me. to be honest, i dont get life. I used to "think" that i was a kind of good looking guy, with a nice personality who shows huge amounts of affection and love, in my life i wanted to get into a stable relationship and get married, kids house ect. but all the ppl around me are different, they laugh at me when i mention soething like "i want a relationship with commitment". maybe someone out there can answer me this: why do all the females are attractied to males who steal/take drugs/about 10 years older than them/evil to everyone aorund them/and usualy treat the girls like a piece of *beep*. this is my view of relationships at my age and i am very confused i know when im older things will change, but im never going to meet anyone, im to alone to go out and meet ppl and seriously am i going to find the women of my dreams in a library????? im an outcast everwhere i go and i make a effort to involve but i just get regicted.

thankyou nenez somehow you have made my life a little clearer already. for once, in a long time, i smiled while reading your article. the problem is is the fact i want to have friends but i cant go up to complete stranger and ask to be my friend, and i dont want to go to any clubs. i cant seem to fins anyone in this world that suits me, that needs someone like me though

its just that i dotn seem to have anything left to live for. ill try right down why i want to die but its harder writing it down than it is thinking about it. well, i have no friends, im 16 and alone, and because of that i dont have a g/f and i keep getting pressuried by my family i have to go out more ect to get friends and a g/f. the more i stay in, the more i become mroe shy and scared of the outside world. In july (around 2 days b4 my b day) im getting de-placed from my job. I sit and cry of a night, and sometimes during the day, anywhere i can hide away, my family does not know about this and for the past 4 months they think i have not been talking to them. I dont understand why, ppl like me who enjoy staying in rather than going out get picked on, all my life i have been called ugly, sad, loner ect ect. ive never had a g/f and my dream is one day i may have a family, but i dont feel as that will be coming true. I live a life of a lie, i blame ppl aorund me for the smallest mistakes, i cant uphold a conversatuion with anyone, and i get really frustrated when ppl try to cheer me up or keep talking to me, i just feel like punching them. life cunfuses me and im scared of the future and what it will bring i dont understand why someone has everything while someone else has nothing. I have no believes so when i die i wont go to heaven or hell, im not scared of dieing. I have no hobbies in life or dont go out to any clubs, i feel scared and paranoid why ppl looking at me i mainly sit in my room on my PC or listen to my music. im pretty sad and lonly, no life . Ive started recently cutting my wrists as i feel this helps me release the pain. well hopefully on my 17th birthday my woes will be gone, i am not leaving anyone behind, who would care? maybe my mum N dad and pl say its selfish if i kill myself and upset my family, arnt they being selfish for not letting me rest in peace? i find very little things funny now as all i got on my mind is death im scared to tell anyone about this for several reasons, for a start they wouldnt beleave me anyway, if they did and i did get help it wouldnt help my social life. my life sux and im scared. Im scared of what will (not) happen in the future and im pressurized to do anything. Im clumsy and forgetful and have no joy. i know ur gonna say stuff like "get out" "make some friends" "go talk to someone" ect but the answer to all of the questions are above or the fact is im Scared and ive been through life alone, and im scared i will always stay alive alone also i dont have no confidence left to do anything.... well thats all i can think of at the moment, and sorry its a little patchy as im writing of the top of me head.

hi ppl i was really posting to say im gonna well, commit suicide on my 17th birthday. it was going to be my 18th as i was going to give life a chance, but nothing has happened in the past year and a lot of things are going to happen around my birthday that i dont think i am strong enough to go through it alone. also what i was asking, whats the painless way to go? im thinking of taking an aspiring to thin the blood, slice both veins on my wrists and then pass out of lack of blood, then die in my uncounsciousnes. will this work?

HI, thnx for the advice. even thoguh it isnt what i asked

hi i have recently (past week) started to cut myself for my own personal reasons. and since i dont have much knowledge about it i got 2 questions. 1) where abouts on your wrist are you meant to cut yourself? i am cutting just above the wrist where the main vein is (im saving that for when i kill myself) ya, as i was saying, im cutting a little along the wrist so the vein cant be seen, is that right? 2) this one i need URGENT answer to, do you have any good excuses for getting the cuts on ur arms, no1 knows i do it and have these feelings and if my parents found out i couldnt bear what would happen. so...any good excuses? Thank YOU!