First date went great, second date not so much...what to do?

So had a second date Saturday night, which I would say went only so, so. The thing is I'm torn since, I really liked the guy after the first date and perhaps built him up a bit too much in my head, so I was a bit disappointed with the second date. I do feel partially responsible for the date not going so well, as I had had a long and rough day and was not even in the mood to go on the date but didn't want to cancel last minute.

The guy drove over an hour to my city, which I really appreciated and thanked him more than once for. We went to dinner, which went ok, he's pretty talkative so we didn't really have any lulls in the conversation. I did notice that he tended to talk about himself a lot, which put me off a bit but wasn't a deal breaker since I figured he could just be nervous. After dinner he asked where I wanted to go next, and I told him there was a bar with a live band a couple of blocks down if he wanted to check it out, and he agreed very enthusiastically. When we got to the bar it was pretty loud and just not my crowd, but my date seemed to love it, so I was ok with staying. However at this point I was pretty tired, and it was kind of hard for me to act upbeat so I may have came across a bit y or uninterested. My date must've sensed that I was a bit off and was trying pretty hard to cheer me up, and he kept touching the small of my back or my shoulder and trying to make me laugh, and it helped a bit but I probably wasn't as engaged as I was on our first date. Finally we left after almost 2 hours and he drove me home. When he dropped me off he kissed me before I got out of car, and we ended up making out for about 15 minutes. After that I told him to get home safe and got out of the car.

The next morning not sure about how I felt about the date, and feeling partially guilty that I made him drive this far for not such a great date, I texted him saying that i hoped he got home ok last night. He texted back saying he got him at 3am (he dropped me off at 2am), and that he was wiped out, then asked me how my walk home was sarcastically (he dropped me off a couple of doors down from my building). I responded sarcastically that it was a long walk but i made it home in once peace, and asked him how his day was going, his response gave me the impression that he thinks we live too far apart: "glad you made it home safe and sound. I swear the ride home took forever...then I realized I needed gas " and then he went on to tell me about his day. I then responded saying "oh yea that can be a long ride (especially without gas lol), i feel your pain though lol. Enjoy your night." The reason I said I feel his pain is because he knows my commute to work is about an hour each way every morning. I should also say he works in the building next door from where I work, so our first date was in the same area after work. And for the second date he's the one who insisted on coming to me. At this point I'm not sure what to think, do I really care if I ever see him again? Im not sure, but I feel as though because our first date went so well, to maybe give it another chance and maybe get together after work again? Also at this point I'm not quite sure how he feels about me either, doubt he's as keen on me as he was after the first date too.

Did he already have an idea how far you lived before setting up the date?

If so, and if he insisted on coming to you, then that's not your fault. Esp. if he didn't plan to get gas before hand.

And just because a guy is sarcastic to a date, doesn't mean he doesn't like her. More likely, it's the opposite.

I can be quite sarcastic, but only do it to people I like and have a good rapport with. If I couldn't care less about someone, I wouldn't bother with sarcasm.

And considering you kissed and made out, I would think you were worth the trip.

I would stay in contact with him and offer to go to him on the next date.

Did he already have an idea how far you lived before setting up the date?

If so, and if he insisted on coming to you, then that's not your fault. Esp. if he didn't plan to get gas before hand.

 

And just because a guy is sarcastic to a date, doesn't mean he doesn't like her. More likely, it's the opposite.

I can be quite sarcastic, but only do it to people I like and have a good rapport with. If I couldn't care less about someone, I wouldn't bother with sarcasm.

 

And considering you kissed and made out, I would think you were worth the trip.

 

I would stay in contact with him and offer to go to him on the next date.

Yes he knew how far I lived.

I don’t mind the sarcasm, but we didn’t text much yesterday and we usually text all day long (within reason and with large gaps in response time) and I was the one who initiated by saying I hoped he got home ok. I haven’t heard from him today, just getting the vibe he may no longer be that interested.

At this time, I would filter out the distance/driving issue from the equation and focus on the actual date. 1st date was good, while the 2nd was not as good as the 1st date. The 3rd date could be the determining factor on whether to continue with this person.

Figure out what was the difference between the 2 dates. Items such as "him talking a lot about himself" should not be overlooked. lt would be a deal breaker for me if my date didn't make the effort to learn more about me. Also, simplify and choose a setting where the two of you and not the place/event, is the priority.

I don't see the huge problem. You are overanaylyzing a bit for just a second date. He isn't really showing any red flags, wait for the third date and see what happens.