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Research supports the importance of eNA and similar social support


IAmFCA

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This place (and forums like it) have helped me grow so much...my real life friend group is awesome, but limited (nor do I always feel comfortable sharing with them what I do on here).

 

I've found so many people here on similar journeys, and is been so helpful bouncing ideas off people, gaining different perspective...learning alternate ways to handle different situations...so valuable.

 

Like the article suggests though, "finding the right coach" is a big part of things...I tend to look for people who I want to emulate, and their advice is weighted heavier...if that makes sense. I guess it's like...you have to find your tribe...find people that feel authentic to you and are on similar trajectories (and that path leads to where you WANT to go). Although I do much value the friendships and advice of people that are on different paths, their advice isn't always relevant to where I'm going.

 

I only wish I could have you guys with me to go to the gym with and cook with...imagine the power in that.

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ENA has been an essential tool for my growth by expanding my understanding of others and of myself; giving me a safe place to use my voice however it comes out; and providing me advice that I can't get elsewhere. My friends don't offer the variety of experiences as represented here. Often, they also don't offer the same clarity of standards with regards to emotional health. After all, it is easy to say YOLO and take what comes.

 

-----

 

 

Wrote that a few hours ago. As I wrote it, a solution to a social situation took shape, I implemented, and it paid off better than expected.

 

I may start a work thread that forces me to devote my dating energy into my work, so that I grow through that lens as I have through my relationship lens.

 

A powerful tool, this forum and its community.

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/

 

If we involve others in our efforts to adopt/enhance these habits, we will change in ways both comfortable and dramatic.

 

Its why I joined a gym, use eNA, follow thought leaders on twitter and try to be one for others in my work life. All of that creates a social component that holds me accountable. I don't like being managed --- this is a more subtle way at the same thing.

 

The social component delivers.

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2 things have helped me a lot: ENA and professional therapy. I do agree that a social component is important. It's validating and it adds some level of accountability. It's also harder to slip into bad habits (physical, or thought patterns) when you have people on you.

 

My life can be pretty isolated in a social sense. I do see people often (for playing games, etc) and I deal with a lot of people at work but deep down, I am pretty isolated because I don't really have many deep connections with people and it's not like I feel comfortable confiding in my family with my personal struggles and obstacles. I really don't know what I'd do without ENA. Who would I go to? I don't have an answer.

 

As an aside, this is why I think it is important to view internet access as a utility, not a luxury. I feel pretty strongly about this. No one needs super duper high speed internet but even just 1-2 Mbps connection is adequate to access the abundant resources on here. This is not the 1980s and earlier, when you could just go to your local library and other places and ask around and learn how to do things.

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2 things have helped me a lot: ENA and professional therapy. I do agree that a social component is important. It's validating and it adds some level of accountability. It's also harder to slip into bad habits (physical, or thought patterns) when you have people on you.

 

My life can be pretty isolated in a social sense. I do see people often (for playing games, etc) and I deal with a lot of people at work but deep down, I am pretty isolated because I don't really have many deep connections with people and it's not like I feel comfortable confiding in my family with my personal struggles and obstacles. I really don't know what I'd do without ENA. Who would I go to? I don't have an answer.

 

As an aside, this is why I think it is important to view internet access as a utility, not a luxury. I feel pretty strongly about this. No one needs super duper high speed internet but even just 1-2 Mbps connection is adequate to access the abundant resources on here. This is not the 1980s and earlier, when you could just go to your local library and other places and ask around and learn how to do things.

 

You make a great point about internet access as a utility. I hadn't thought of that in this context. Where I live our public libraries all have computers for public access. I don't know how useful they are for accessing sites like this one - whether it is even possible.

 

Without eNA? My horizons would be only as far as I can see. ENA has made me see so much more than that, well beyond myself.

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You make a great point about internet access as a utility. I hadn't thought of that in this context. Where I live our public libraries all have computers for public access. I don't know how useful they are for accessing sites like this one - whether it is even possible.

 

Without eNA? My horizons would be only as far as I can see. ENA has made me see so much more than that, well beyond myself.

 

When I lived at home, I would frequently go to the local library (either I biked or used my mom's car) to read, relax, write, hang out, etc. I had an old laptop and there was free wi-fi there but it was slow. Those who didn't have computers were stuck using the library's computers, which had a waiting list and you were limited to 15-20 min I think.

 

I think basic internet access is so important these days. Even if you just use a mobile device. People with internet have such an advantage over those who don't. Again, not talking high speeds, I mean just 1-2 Mbps or so to look at most sites without issue. You can access information on ANYTHING. You can ask Google questions. You can conduct your own research about recipes, food ingredients, medical procedures, labor laws, car purchases, house upkeep, child milestones, medications - ANYTHING. Yes, I know that not everything on the internet is true and one must be careful but there is so much good, reputable information on there, both from other users and official sources, such as government websites.

 

I am not one to tout a lot of government programs and such but I definitely believe that internet is a necessity these days, not a luxury, and we need to make sure that people have access, whether it be over cable broadband or mobile access. We need to consider it a utility and treat it as such.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Oprah Winfrey, remembering her friendship with Maya Angelou:

 

The most important thing she said to me was "You are enough."

 

Breathe, people. Breathe.

 

Valerie Simpson of Dr. Angelou's ability to heal: "'Cuz you think you're grown. But you're not. You're just not."

 

 

We are here because Dr. Angelou isn't here for us to talk to, so we talk to each other.

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I've used eFNA a couple of times - including right now - when I've been in real deep s**t. Without it I simply don't know what I would have done, as my social network tends to be small and I guess I also think those people in my social network would not be comfortable with me disclosing how I feel about things.

 

People on this forum by default DO have time to hear you, and that's what's comforting. You know that if everyone else in your life has not been able to help, someone on here will try.

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