Not sure what to do (work colleague)

Hi,

I can’t stop thinking about this girl from work. First off, she’s 19, I’m 25, I’ve never heard her mention a boyfriend either. I’m very shy in nature (always have been), and have never had a girlfriend! The girl is also fairly shy, and fairly quiet. She’s worked in the shop i work for about 6 months now, at first we really only said hello and smiled at each other. More recently however I’ve been working alongside her more and we’ve started chatting more about various things and we also have a laugh about some of the more interesting customers that come in! I tend to be the one that goes over to work with her, I guess I just want to spend more time with her, but then she will sometimes come over and help aswell when I am working on something else.

It must be pretty obvious to her that I like her, however I don’t know whether she is just being polite by talking to me or whether she also likes me.

I don’t know whether I should ask her out, and if so, how should I go about it!

It’s also worth mentioning that we’ve both been looking for new jobs in different areas. I mentioned to her last week about an interview I would be having and she asked me the following week how this went (one of the few things she’s actually asked me, I tend to be the one that asks her stuff!). However recently she mentioned to me that she was having an interview for a job, but said I was the only one that she’d told as didn’t want to seem stupid if she didn’t get it. I made sure to say good luck to her beforehand and asked her how it went when I next saw her (I don't have her number either), hopefully this was the right move and showed her I think about her. Anyway, she ended up getting the job and will be leaving in a week or so.

I know if I didn’t ask her out I’d probably keep wondering what if, we both seem very alike so got a good feeling it would work but really want to be able to tell if she’s interested or maybe if the age difference would be an issue?

I really didn’t want things to get awkward if I do ask her out and she doesn’t feel the same way, as we’d still have to work together (she is going to keep doing a couple of shifts in the evening but at the moment I don't work the same ones)!

So basically, how can I tell if she is into me, and whether or not I should ask her out and the best way to go about this? P.S. the thought of dinner on a first date scares me! I'd much prefer the cinema/bowling or something along those lines if that would be appropriate!

All advice is appreciated

Work relationships are usually a bad idea because if it fails it's very uncomfortable.

But if you still want to proceed, simply ask her out for drinks after work or coffee.

Here's the situation: You have 2 options with three possible outcomes.

1.) Ask her out - this will result in either a "yes" (hurrah) or a "no" (you will feel dumb and crappy for a few days, but also you will feel a victory because you faced the fear)

2.) Don't ask her out and wonder for the rest of your life what would have happened and also kick yourself occasionally

So, in summery, of the three options, two will make you feel sort of bad (but you'll get over it) and one will make you feel great.

When you look back on your life, a year from now, 10 years from now - how do you want to remember how you handled this.

And remember: Fortune favours the brave.

ps: Just ask her out for a latte or something, you don't need to go all "date" on the girl -that's tons of pressure for a shy guy. If she says yes to coffee and it goes well, then take the next step. She will probably give you some hints, notice them and pick up on them.