Girlfriend is pregnant--I'm miserable and feeling stuck, help!

So, I posted here a while back looking for help concerning this same relationship that I'm still in. It was broken then, and it's even more broken now.

Some background--been dating this girl 3 1/2 years now. I was infatuated with her looks and the fact she was coming out of a bad marriage--we are both 29 years old as of now. I felt like I could help her, that she was a diamond in the rough. I chased and chased, and eventually won her. The prize for succeeding was nothing like I envisioned it. I quickly realized that she has some serious affection issues and a depression problem. She as of now is STILL married to this other guy. I've begged her, threatened to leave her, and told her how I feel about that--she FINALLY filed for divorce when we found out she was pregnant. Up until then, she enjoyed using his military benefits to deal with her medical/thyroid issues. Now the state of Georgia isn't willing to grant the divorce with an unborn baby involved.

So here we are. She's 8 months pregnant, and I'm basically her roomate. She never touches me, never kisses me, never does anything but exude negativity. Her affection issues have been a BIG problem for us, so much so that it became a make or break issue before she was ever pregnant. The ONLY time I've ever truly seen this girl happy; finally glimpsed the diamond I thought she was was when she was on anti-depressants. She was a different person. To this day she refuses to admit she is depressed nor that she NEEDS this medication. It was the only time she ever kissed me with her mouth open....

As of now she is basically impossible to live with. Nothing I do is enough, she says she wants space and then complains she feels alone. I've invested all I can to prepare our house for the baby, I've never complained once about the lack of affection, I've done all I can to just suck it up, give her leave because shes pregnant, and nothing works. I'm still the bad guy.

If there was no child involved, I'd be gone. My biggest fear is losing my daughter. Here in Georgia, unmarried Men have little to no rights at all when it comes to their children. In fact, I met with a lawyer just to see what my rights were and it was quite the wake up call--he told me to do all I could to work it out just to protect what little rights I did have to see my baby. ALL of her family is in Minnesota. I know that if we broke up, her family would all but send a private jet to shuttle her--and my daughter--2000 miles away from me. I would have to move there, file for some sort of custody in that state, and hope to see her once in a while.

That though petrifies me. I couldn't be more excited to be a dad, and more excited to teach my child. I'm 110% committed to her, and I always will be.

Stuck is the best word I can come up with. It seems that no matter what happens, I'm the bad guy. If we break up, off shes goes, and before you know it I'm going to be struggling to even be a relevant part of my daughters life.

I'm scared, I'm miserable, I'm lonely. Any perspective/thoughts/advice would be more than welcome.

You are in a very difficult situation. While I am suspecting in hindsight you may be wondering if you made the right choice to stay involved with her, that is now water under the bridge and reality is here- she is pregnant and still married to another guy.

Are you going to be able to get your name on the birth certificate? Since she was married while she got pregnant, how are they going to determine child support?

If she gets divorced, do you want to marry her? Or continue being with her in a relationship? Does she want to be with you? Marry you?

If you two both want to be together, then I would suggest couples counseling.

If you aren't going to be together, then I would work with an attorney to nail down your rights with regard to your child.

Get a DNA test on the baby thru legal channels. If the baby carries your gene, you can probably do something to get her from her mother who is depressed & is still technically married to this other guy.

You are in a very difficult situation. While I am suspecting in hindsight you may be wondering if you made the right choice to stay involved with her, that is now water under the bridge and reality is here- she is pregnant and still married to another guy.

 

Are you going to be able to get your name on the birth certificate? Since she was married while she got pregnant, how are they going to determine child support?

 

If she gets divorced, do you want to marry her? Or continue being with her in a relationship? Does she want to be with you? Marry you?

If you two both want to be together, then I would suggest couples counseling.

 

If you aren't going to be together, then I would work with an attorney to nail down your rights with regard to your child.

I love the girl, for whatever reason. I have no interest in marriage right now, but MAYBE down the road if she ever treats her depression and works at giving more to the relationship.

She hasn't seen her ex in a very long time. They used the marriage so that A. he could get a stipend from the military and B. So she got free insurance. That's why they drug their heels after breaking up to get the divorce. He is scrambling to get the divorce done now that she is pregnant, but I doubt it goes through before my daughter is here.

I will sign the BC, it won't be contested. He won't try to claim the child or anything. I honestly hope all of this gets him in trouble with the government and the military. It's ridiculous.

As for a lawyer, I've already nailed down my rights--I HAVE NONE. The laws are pathetically biased, subjective, and unfair for guys like me who want to be in their childs life. Makes me want to scream