Just needed to vent... clear my head.

I love my boyfriend very much and I do not want to break up.

We've been together for around 11 months, so that initial excitement (honeymoon phase) has ended... for him at least.

In person, it is still VERY much alive. But I hardly see him. The only way for us to contact eachother is through calling and texting. He has no internet where he is, so we can't skype like we used to.

What I am finding is that I am tIhe one saying sweet things, etc. I know he works 12 hours a day or more, EVERYDAY, so he is often exhausted by the end of the day and our phone conversation is dull and lifeless. Somedays, he will say something sweet and might randomly phone me if he is not too busy at work..

I don't even know where I am going with this. I just feel so disconnected and I want him to be excited to speak to me. But how can I blame him? We both do the same things every day, so it gets old. I would be up for some more naughty phone conversations, if you know what I mean, but he isn't really like that. So even keeping the romance alive is not happening...

I think I'm going to back off a bit. I never thought I'd have to worry about him missing me when we're long distance, I just thought it was a given.

I miss him all the time and I love being vocal about it but that's not his style. It seems when I back off and let him initiate the call or text, he is more responsive.

And believe me when I say, telling him is not going to work. I jokingly mention that I wish he would do more sweet things or when he does, I really praise him... but calling him up and initiating a serious conversation will only push him away more. I know him. And I tend to overanalyze everything and that really annoys him so he will think that is what I am doing. I think I have lost my right to any real problems with him (sad to say) because of how I have behaved in the past.

I guess now all I can do is hope that we will see eachother soon.

Just venting, I guess.

Don't be too hard on him. The man has got to be exhausted working 12 hour days. My hubby also works 12 hour days, and it wears the man out. He doesn't want to do anything but veg out and watch tv after work, and I don't expect anything else. It's hard at times, but he is a different man on his days off.

Put yourself in his shoes and you may see why he is a bit distant during your evening phone calls. It's not you.

Don't be too hard on him. The man has got to be exhausted working 12 hour days. My hubby also works 12 hour days, and it wears the man out. He doesn't want to do anything but veg out and watch tv after work, and I don't expect anything else. It's hard at times, but he is a different man on his days off.

 

Put yourself in his shoes and you may see why he is a bit distant during your evening phone calls. It's not you.

I agree, it is hard on him. But it was the same way when he wasn't working because he was unhappy about it. So either way, it is like this.

I will do that though. I can imagine how hard it would be to work that much. He probably just wants space to himself. Aw, now I just sound terrible complaining while he is doing all that work.. I would be exhausted too.

Lol, don't beat yourself up. My hubby has been doing this for a year and it's still hard to get used to on some days. When I finally realized it wasn't anything to do with me though, it was a weight lifted off my shoulders. It just takes a bit of adjustment.

Lol, don't beat yourself up. My hubby has been doing this for a year and it's still hard to get used to on some days. When I finally realized it wasn't anything to do with me though, it was a weight lifted off my shoulders. It just takes a bit of adjustment.

You did make me feel better by saying that. I always assume it's me and I don't know why... I will give him more credit for the effort he makes.

I think that boys are just like that... I can kind of identiry

I've always been a bad communicator and i'm finding it really hard to keep this working/interesting.....

A normal conversation with me and my love (who i will see in 6 weeks) is starting to get a bit mundane. At least he always says "i love you" when we hang up.

Anyone have any ideas/thoughts/observations...

I seriously need help with opening up, we've only known eachother since July and spent 4 wonderful months together... but from past experiences it takes me years to start to open up... and i know he's expecting me to be more open about my feelings but i'm crap at it!??!!

Aww hon, it can be frustrating when we deal with things different. Just as everyone else says it is def NOT you. He loves you. Remember that