Online dating Ice breaker tips needed

Hi I'm 25 never really had a girlfriend, been on few dates thats about it I tend to come accross really shy towards people.

I have been trying this online dating thing and not having much success in getting replys, Problem I have is sending Ice breakers for the first msg, I never really know on what sort of thing I'd should say in the first email, I find on alot of girls profiles they havn't written enough for me to ask them things about.

My emails have been very original like "Hi how are you, you look nice, I would like to get to know you, have you had a good weekend". sounds really lame!

Any Idea on how I can improve on sending opening emails to girls. I'm really stumped what to ask and how to ask.

I used to write

Hi, I found your profile intriguing. Please feel free to take a look at mine. I look forward to hearing from you.

sometimes I would add a few words about something in the profile that specifically caught my attention but only if it was really unique.

I did not like getting the canned "tease" or "icebreaker" if that's what you call it. I wasn't a huge fan of the first words mentioning my looks. I know, "men are visual" but it felt a little objectifying to have that be the very first part.

I would agree with Batya...When i was online and if guys emailed me a generic response that could be used on anyone i was pretty turned off...pick up something specific about the person, ideally 1 physical and 1 personality trait that you like about the person...

I would think you would have a bette chance of finding someone decent in the old way of dating than internet dating. Internet dating sites are full of chronic daters and women are more superficial than in life. Like man, women only look at the pictures to determine to give you a shot or not.

Make sure to read everything in their profile. Find out which of their interests or what part of their background is common to yours, or which strikes you as being unique.

What you write should indicate (a) that you've read their profile (b) you have an interest in something about them by asking them a question © you keep it short (a few lines), light, and positive and (d) you have a sense of humor. Do not talk a lot about yourself unless you are asked about it. And as much as possible, keep it personal. Refer to the person's name (or user name), details about them, etc. All of these things will encourage a person to respond to you.

I am a guy. It is harder for us to get responses from women, than women from men on most dating websites. You cannot simply send a one line generic e-mail and expect a response. We have to invest more time than that. It may seem unfair but that's the nature of things.

I had a lot of success by spending a lot of time reading profiles and choosing people that had the same type of education, background, and interests as me. In my e-mails to them I would ask about these topics. Always be asking questions. People like to talk about themselves. If they ask you questions back, that is the basis of conversation and usually and indication they are interested.

Most importantly, don't get hung up on one person. Contact as many people that interest you as you can. Be open to meeting new people of all types, not just finding your soulmate. This increases your chances. More than likely if you've been careful and thoughtful in your opening e-mail, without being too wordy or seeming obsessive, you will have the best chance of a response.

Good luck

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BTW, if a person does not give you enough information in their profile, I would skip them. These people probably either (a) aren't serious about online dating; (b) aren't very creative; or © expect that men will contact them no matter what is written.

I am 29 yrs old I never had a gf or a date yet. I thought online dating would be the solution for me, but it was not. It was a waste of time and money. Online dating is overrated, it is all about looks and appearance.

Hi I'm 25 never really had a girlfriend, been on few dates thats about it I tend to come accross really shy towards people.

 

I have been trying this online dating thing and not having much success in getting replys, Problem I have is sending Ice breakers for the first msg, I never really know on what sort of thing I'd should say in the first email, I find on alot of girls profiles they havn't written enough for me to ask them things about.

 

My emails have been very original like "Hi how are you, you look nice, I would like to get to know you, have you had a good weekend". sounds really lame!

 

Any Idea on how I can improve on sending opening emails to girls. I'm really stumped what to ask and how to ask.

I personally like simple starter emails - that is hi, how are you then a few questions that refer to things on my profile. As with the girls above, it must be original and specific to me, not some generic response sent to all 10 girls you found attractive.

I wouldn't like someone to be too flirty or say things like "you look beautiful / nice" I find that kinda superficial.. but that's just me!

To be honest the profile is the most important thing, have a good online profile, and the person will respond to the email. I've started off with some rather boring emails / msn chats with someone who had a good profile, and eventually we started to connect... email / msging is difficult, because not everyone likes doing it all that much.

Ammy

Out of my 10 friends who met their spouses on line, one of the couples met where neither of them had a picture posted. They got married 1.5 years later (both are attractive), and that was almost 6 years ago.

I met about 100 men in person through on line dating and would not meet men who seemed overly focused on my looks. I also would not meet men whose pictures repulsed me either because of their features or the type of picture they posted (rejections based just on looks were rare). Of course looks mattered but no more than in any other type of meeting or social situation.

I recently started online seeking thing, I didn't have success for awhile and just recently I did and it started out by just saying great things about them, get them talking about them and everything else will fall into place from there.

Iam 21 almost 22 and also have never dated or had a g/f but iam getting very close.

Whatever you are putting to start the conversation is good enough. You have to modify your profile and picture to get better results, and target women who have just joined the dating sites since your last visit as the full brunt of your online campaign, and put your profile in such a way (if it's alphabetical) that it's on the top of any search list.

I agree with what people say that women are just too superficial on these online dating sites and unless you are very attractive, or have some really unique and interesting profile, they will just look at your profile before replying and then decide whether to reply or not no matter what you write.

The problem also is that unless the woman starts the conversation with you, then you are always having a lower value than she does and are bunched up with the many guys that are also sending emails to her and giving her an ego-trip, thus it's better if you can have a great picture and profile and have them write to you first, otherwise, just write any message you want.

Every opener by every guy has already been tried if she's getting 50 emails a day -- whatever you can possibly think of, probably a hundred guys have already done the same while her account was open.

I was shy too and tried online dating, but most of the time I seem to have a very negative experience using online dating that I'd prefer to meet people offline, in Christian circles, now instead, and this is certainly incentive for me to work on my shyness.

One thing (I didn't read the OP's comments) but remain focused on getting "A" date not one with the girl you've fixated on and keep refreshing her page to read more about. Girls get a million replies whereas a guy might get 3... Just keep at it and stay unique. I've been with my 'internet' gf for almost 5 months now and she has said several times the only reason that she read my message over the 20 others she got the 1st day she had her profile online was because I was unique. One thing you've got to realize is that if they don't reply, it's not 'your' loss it's theirs... It sounds cliche, but it's very true!