Renniks

tried functioning today, think i might have nearly killed myself an my mum, kept thinking about it ( i was driving). i regularly tell her how much she means to me, an she does the same, she is my first my last my everything my all, i dont really know how to pay her more attention physically, i wasnt to start with but dint think it would be appreciated, now i do now shes asked, but it doesnt seem to be enough apparently, im new to this so unsure what else to do, but thought i was doing it right, so to speak. im now starting to doubt everything i thought was true

i dont know if i can believe what she says either now or trst her, cos she said she still wants to spend the rest of hjer life with me, but i dont know if i can believe her, i want to, but i doubt really badly now, if she felt that way, why would she even tralk to him, let alone think of being a sex buddy an asking me for reasons not to, unless shes doing this to make me take action so to speak, but if thats what she wanted, why the hell didnt she say so, i think i might just be making excuses for her now.

i dont know if i can talk to her, im supposed to be going away with her an some other people this weekend, dunno if i can now, im just so scared of losing her, im drinking so that i cant think or feel anything, so that i dont think of her. im worrieed im gonna do summit daft to myself, cos i just want to control thtis pain an fear, cos ive done that before for a diferent reason tho.

the married bloke is my friend, theyre the same person, sorry, iom bad at explaining at the mo, drinking too much, not eating, smoking too much, dont want to sleep cos my dreams are of me without her, or her saying goodbye. she says she doesnt think she does enough for me, but she does mroe than enough, an that i dont pay her enough attention physically, to show her shes physically what i want, so to speak. she asked me to give her a reason why she shouldnt be sex buddies with my mate, i tried, dsont know if i succeeded tho.

been together about 6 weeks, i know more about her than i know my friends ive known for years. an its my married friend that tried to kiss her an that shes talking to

i live in a different town to my girlfriend so eve sntching time to see each other, but still see each other quite regularly. now two days ago i asked to come my town for the night an invited her out to a friends party with my mates, i wil admit so i could show her off, cos i think shes so good looking an fantastic. she got on really well with one of my mates, an i got really jealous, an didnt pay her enough attention to start off with, i was drunk at the time, but sobered up a bit an started paying her attention properly. but i would go to the loo (weak bladder after a while when ive been drinking) an come back an find her dancing very closely with him, but they split up when they saw me, now shes told me he tried to kiss her bt she pushed him away, this i believed when she told me, but not sure now. cos shes been talking to him on messenger when she got back to her town, an apparently he says he wants to be a sex buddy with her, hes ben married a year now, had his anniversary recently, she said, tell me why i shouldnt take him up on it. now i admit im not as sexually adventurous as she is, cos im still bloody nervous cos she was teh second time id had sex, now im getting better, the sex she says is very good, an i believe her unless she a good actor, but im not dominant enough, im not shy about my body or my manhood cos she says im well off, so to speak, but i still aint got the nerves to be as dominant as she wants, also dont think ive got enough experience for her, she has a lot more than me, but im learning new things quick. now my friend i thought i could trust, but if i seem him anytime soon im liable to confront him an probably hit him, cos i thought i coud trust him, oh well, but my problem is i really dont want her to go with someone else while shes with me, cos she say she wants to be with me, but this leaves me major doubts, an its now making em think can i trust her, cos before i trusted her implicitly. just any advice would be good, please help. i apologise if none of that made sense. Renniks

im sorry this is lae, and it may not be of much use to you, i do some work with disabeld people, im 19, its mainly children i get to meet, most of them have CP, theyre all great, clever and nice kids, theyre easy to get along with. all in all i dont have any problems with it, my girlfriend has CP, i think hes the most beautiful person in the worls, (shes also cleverer and better looking than me, though dont tell her i said that ) minaly i have found people with CP are cheeerful people, just, like the rest of us, trying to get on with life.

i like to consider myself as a nice guy, i agree with wisdom gained, all you have to do is wait, i had sort of told myself that i was going ot go through life being lonely and miserable, but, fate has proved me wrong (again), i am going out with one of the most beautiful women, in my view that is, i have ever known, she is beautiful on the outside, and beautiful on the inside, remember looks arent always skin deep, they sometimes reach the heart too, just give it time, and be confident, its what i lacked, but its what i have now due to my g/f, time and patience is all it takes. Good luck mate.

thanks for the advice, what i need really is advice on how to cope with the fact that i probably wont be able to see her for a year, its really starting to rip me apart, the problem is, ive speny quite a few years building up walls and defences in my mind to the fact that im single and the fact that i may stay single, ive grown used to it, and now my world has been turned upside down, in a good way, but i dont understand whats going on really, i know that may sound stupid, i think im just afraid of whats going on, and being unsure as to how to handle it, as this is a totally new situation to me. One of my friends said that when they have problems they just blank them out, they also said that as im a mechanic i know how to fix things, so i should be able to work out how to fix this, the problem is, i dont though. I just get the feeling that running and hiding would be the best answer, even though i know it isnt.

erm.... where to begin..... im 18 yr's old, when i first told someone i really liked them they laughed in my face, i decided that i didn't want to be stung twice so i kept my feelings to myself from then on, till this summer.... i met a girl on a two week volunteer work camp, i got on really well with her, and my feelings kept on growing for her, it was nearly the end of the second week when i told her i liked her, she said she liked me too, after the work camp we stayed in the same town (diferent houses) for a week, we spent quite a lot of time together, talking, mucking about, showing her around town, etc, i got to know her a bit more, unfortunately i had ro go back to work. The girl i liked was staying in the country for a little while, and it took me a little while for me to work up the nerve to tell her how much i liked her, she responded by saying she also liked me alot as well, the problem is, that im not sure what to do, think or say, she is going back to her country, and i hope to keep in touch with her, one fo the main problems is that im already missing her quite badly, she says she will come back to the work camp next year, and i hope she will, but i need advice on what to do, please help, im not very good with these kinds of people skills.