B.G.

Deb that is great but what about GUYS who are in the same pain. Actually I think my pain is as great if not worse than yours or other women in your boat. How about a book Men who love to much?

Ok so it has been five days of no contact. I have lost 13 lbs, cannot eat and went on a date saturday and it was terrible all I was thinking about was my Ex. This is taking over my life and it is something I cannot cope with any longer. I will not contact her because I know she will not say what I want to hear and I will feel worse or I can say at this point if she was happy and doing OK without me it would break me more. I know it has been only five days but I have talked to friends, family, pretty much anyone who will listen. But everyone seems to think it is not a big deal. "It takes time, you will get over it." or "It wasn't working anyway- she deserves what she gets or you will find someone better" etc. etc. etc. It is not really helping. If I hear a song I think of her, same thing with a tv show or movie just about anything. I want to know if anyone has tried counseling and if it helps? Or what kind of counselor? At this point I don't think meeting other girls will help. All I do is constantly check my email and cell phone- did she call? NO of course not but I hope I can get over this. I am running out of options- did anyone ever hear of the book Lifted Hearts- I see some people have read it and it helped? Can a book really help someone getting through this type of pain and emptiness? I don't know. Knowing there are people here going thru this and being a part of this site does help a little. Thanks for reading.

Yes, until recently I thought I was the only one who hurt this bad. I mean in a matter of one month, I was laid off from my job, my father was diagnosed with cancer and my mother is also sick AND my GF of almost three years left me for someone else. I feel like I have been shot in the stomach. It seems like the whole world is crashing down on me. I had no energy, did not want to eat or do anything at all except lay in bed and mope. All I could think about is her with this new guy and the smile on her face and it made me sick and want to vomit. We were together for two years and broke up this previous october and a few weeks later is was awful. THis is when she met this jerk she is with now. Like a complete moron, I kissed her *beep* and sent flowers and called, emailed and begged and begged. Keep in mind this girl never respected me, was a manipulator and took me for granted and constantly insulted me. I didn't see it but everyone around me did. Why do you take this from her, why do you let her walk all over you. I was blind. So I finally got her back in January and was the perfect gentlemen and I guess I tried to buy and bribe her for her love. IT DID NOT MATTER. She was still thinking about this new guy (who is 35 has a kid and a drug problem) and told me she didn't love him and she thought it was a fling. She lied to me and was secretly talking to him and was very distant and treated me worse than ever. So two days ago I got the phone call (keep in mind losing the job and my parents) she was not supportive at all and always wanted to talk about her. She says its over I don't feel it the spark. I love you and you are a great guy and you deserve to be treated like a king and I cannot do it for you. I felt immediately what is wrong with me. I am good looking and treated her like a queen and only wanted her love. She did not give me her heart and I guess she got back with me out of sympathy. You cannot force someone to love you or be with you. If they are unsure and do not want it to happen 100% it is NOT WORTH IT. Trust me I lived. I have to start all over again. I am still very depressed, I pray all day and think about her constantly. I want to call her and tell her I miss her and see how she is doing, etc. BUT I will not do that I am following the NO CONTACT RULE. It is the only way. When she realizes what she threw away and understands how selfish and stupid she really is she will get hers. I do not wish bad on her but I am jealous that I am so miserable and emplty inside while she immediatlely in the arms of another. However, this may be the best gift she has given me. I do not have to deal with a girl that when we go out is the drunkest on in the bar or a girl constantly insulting me putting me down or making me feel not important. I am important and I deserve to get back the love I give. Trust me it hurts so bad but all I can do is pray that each day it will get better and I will meet a girl that can give me what I deserve. Anyway I am an attorney and got a new job today and my father's cancer may not be as serious as we originally thought. So I hope this can help me slowly move on and get my head off of her. It is so painful and something I would probably not even wish on my worst enemy. However, I hope and pray it will make me a stronger person in the end. It sucks that I had to love someone who did not appreciate me anymore and did not treat me good at all and I accepted it because I wanted to be with her so badly. God willing I will get through this and meet someone new and end this horrible chapter in my life. I just hope as each day passes it gets easier because right now it seems to get worse albeit it has only been a couple days. But like an idiot i still look at my cell phone to see if she called and check my email- I guess it has still not sunken in yet and even if she did call it would upset me especially if she is happy and even if she is not I know I cannot ever get back with her after all she has put me through and again she will walk all over me again. She does not deserve me but I wish is didn't hurt like this. Each day passes ever so slowly and I cannot wait for it to end because I know I will be one day closer to healing. I don't know what to do except pray and know it is for the best and try and move on with my life. If anyone wants to chat feel free to post or Private Message me. God Bless You All

Yes, until recently I thought I was the only one who hurt this bad. I mean in a matter of one month, I was laid off from my job, my father was diagnosed with cancer and my mother is also sick AND my GF of almost three years left me for someone else. I feel like I have been shot in the stomach. It seems like the whole world is crashing down on me. I had no energy, did not want to eat or do anything at all except lay in bed and mope. All I could think about is her with this new guy and the smile on her face and it made me sick and want to vomit. We were together for two years and broke up this previous october and a few weeks later is was awful. THis is when she met this jerk she is with now. Like a complete moron, I kissed her ass and sent flowers and called, emailed and begged and begged. Keep in mind this girl never respected me, was a manipulator and took me for granted and constantly insulted me. I didn't see it but everyone around me did. Why do you take this from her, why do you let her walk all over you. I was blind. So I finally got her back in January and was the perfect gentlemen and I guess I tried to buy and bribe her for her love. IT DID NOT MATTER. She was still thinking about this new guy (who is 35 has a kid and a drug problem) and told me she didn't love him and she thought it was a fling. She lied to me and was secretly talking to him and was very distant and treated me worse than ever. So two days ago I got the phone call (keep in mind losing the job and my parents) she was not supportive at all and always wanted to talk about her. She says its over I don't feel it the spark. I love you and you are a great guy and you deserve to be treated like a king and I cannot do it for you. I felt immediately what is wrong with me. I am good looking and treated her like a queen and only wanted her love. She did not give me her heart and I guess she got back with me out of sympathy. You cannot force someone to love you or be with you. If they are unsure and do not want it to happen 100% it is NOT WORTH IT. Trust me I lived. I have to start all over again. I am still very depressed, I pray all day and think about her constantly. I want to call her and tell her I miss her and see how she is doing, etc. BUT I will not do that I am following the NO CONTACT RULE. It is the only way. When she realizes what she threw away and understands how selfish and stupid she really is she will get hers. I do not wish bad on her but I am jealous that I am so miserable and emplty inside while she immediatlely in the arms of another. However, this may be the best gift she has given me. I do not have to deal with a girl that when we go out is the drunkest on in the bar or a girl constantly insulting me putting me down or making me feel not important. I am important and I deserve to get back the love I give. Trust me it hurts so bad but all I can do is pray that each day it will get better and I will meet a girl that can give me what I deserve. Anyway I am an attorney and got a new job today and my father's cancer may not be as serious as we originally thought. So I hope this can help me slowly move on and get my head off of her. It is so painful and something I would probably not even wish on my worst enemy. However, I hope and pray it will make me a stronger person in the end. It sucks that I had to love someone who did not appreciate me anymore and did not treat me good at all and I accepted it because I wanted to be with her so badly. God willing I will get through this and meet someone new and end this horrible chapter in my life. If anyone wants to chat feel free to post or Private Message me. God Bless You All