12 Days post break-up, 10 days NC. My will is starting to crumble.

Hi All, This is my first post, but I've been an avid reader for about 16 months, and found this community an amazing source of strength and inspiration during this time.

As the title states, I've been broken up from my ex-girlfriend for 12 days, been NC for 10 of those days. We'd been together 7 months, talked about living together in the future, loved spending time together, our sex life was amazing, she really was my lover and best friend. She's been stressed out due to being extremely busy in work, but said the times we spent together was when she felt at her calmest and happiest. She then text me to say she's not in the right frame of mind for a relationship, it was too much pressure and ended things. This was 12 days ago. We last spoke on the phone 10 days ago. Her last words to me were "I love you",mine were 'goodbye' It's been strict NC since those words, and they haunt me. She still has pictures of us kissing, and cuddling on her facebook wall nearly two weeks after finishing things, I really don't know what that means, probably doesn't matter

I'm really struggling at the moment to keep going with the NC, I know I shouldn't expect answers from her, but I'd give anything to hear her voice. The pain is like nothing I've ever experienced.

The photos mean nothing. Don't crumble --- the first month is the hardest.

She knows how to get a hold of you if she wants to try again.

You're not kidding mhowe. I really struggle to understand how someone can talk about living together a couple of weeks beforehand, and then do a total flip fllop, and I guess that's the hardest thing to swallow. All those future plans together, snuffed out. You can probably tell, I'm having a bad day! lol

Stay strong. Don't contact her for any reason and if she reaches out, be very careful about how or if you respond.

Sounds like she started to get cold feet and needs to process everything. Could be over for good, you just have to accept that. Nothing you can say or do is going to change her mind. If she misses you enough, she'll come back. If not, well, you only had 7 months...

If she does come back around and you are in a healthy frame of mind, it will be important to really figure out what went wrong and how to behave differently. Again, only if she comes back and you want to start fresh.

If she felt pressure, maybe you were spending too much time together? Maybe she has a history of this? Anyway, not important now, just focus on yourself.

Thanks for the input pfbsurf. She very much set the pace of the relationship, I was the cautious one. She was just starting to win me over, and I was starting to feel confident about where we were headed when she blew. We used to spend about three nights together a week and every other weekend together.

She did throw out some interesting red flags, and I kid you not, she used to get upset if I didn't put kisses at the end of my text messages, if we argued and I went home she would accuse me of abandoning her, and that it seriously affected her ability to trust me. She was real good at cranking up the pressure, and before you ask, we're in our thirties not high school.

She wasn't ready for a real relationship....you will find a better match.

I'm struggling with my own break up and I'm in no position to help you, but please know that there are other people that are at this time, feeling how you feel. Me being one of them. I know its only for a while, but the loss is forever. The part that gets me is when I think of our plans for our future. So I know where you are coming from. This site has helped and I plan to continue to come here when I need to get a bit of venting out or when I feel the urge to contact.