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  1. #1
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    How Do I know if im an alcoholic

    My wife is convinced I am an alcholic. I do open a bottle of wine most nights. She might have a glass but I have the rest. I love coming in after work and having a few glasses of wine. It just relaxes me. I do admit I have to finish the bottle. But I always feel ok in the morning and It doesnt seem to affect my performance at work. I would find it really hard to stop but I can stop for short periods. I could never give it up forever though which is what she wants. Am I an alcoholic? WHen do you know?
    Kieran

  2. #2
    Member aNnAeLiZaBeTh's Avatar
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    everyone describes alchoholism differently. personally, i believe that an alcoholic is one that allows alcohol to interfere with their life: friends, work, health, and most importantly, family. if alcohol is causing problems between you and your wife, then yes, alcoholism may be a problem in your life. do alcoholics run in your family?? it is very often genetic.

    while i do not think that it is fair for her to ask you to give it up forever, i think you should cut back to 1-2 glasses a night. if you can't cut back to that amount, then you should start going to AA meetings (or get professional help) and cut yourself off completely from the source of the problem: alcohol. if you can't keep your consumption controlled, you must give it up alltogether. hope i helped!! xoxo
    ~...Let me get to the point.
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  3. #3
    JadedStar's Avatar
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    You sound like a functioning alcholic. Functioning alcoholics normally do not check "yes" to the classic alcholic signals such as drinking causing family conflict, keeping you from going into work, personality changes, black outs, etc but if you are drinking a bottle of wine a day, you are an alcoholic. Since it is not changing your personality or effecting your work and such this problem is more going to cause you health problems more than anything else. This is hard on the liver, i am sure you know, to down a bottle of wine every evening.

    Does your family life suffer in anyway from this? Does it alter your personality a great deal? your sexual performance?

    Even if you answer no to those questions you have more than likely developed a serious alcohol dependency.

  4. #4
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    If you cant stop drinking... then you are addicted to it. Period. I dont care if you think its not affecting your life or not, trust me it is.

    At the very least its slowly turning your liver into swiss cheese. Nevermind any side affects on your actual current day life ie work, family, friends etc.

  5. #5
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    Hi Kieran,

    While this subject can often be very controversial and most people have their own opinion about it, many psychologists agree that alcohol consumption becomes abusive/addictive when it is used for medicinal purposes. Therefore, in order to answer your question you need to think about WHY you drink alcohol. If you are drinking it in order to feel better...such as you have a bad, stressful day at work so you come home and have a bottle of wine on more days than not...then I would be concerned. I would also be concerned if your drinking is affecting other areas of your life and causing problems for you.

    What concerns me about your post is that you said "it relaxes me"...which sounds like you are using it for at least some medicinal purposes, and obviously it upsets your wife. My opinion here is that you are not an alcoholic, but that you could be on the road to becoming one.

    I think that you should try to cut down on the bottle of wine a little, and find other ways to relax yourself. I am not at all saying that you shouldn't have a drink after work, because that is fine in moderation. However, you said that you do it most nights and drink most of the bottle. You could take a bath, watch television with your wife, read a book, or do other things to relax.

  6. #6
    Platinum Member hosswhispra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by How did I get here View Post
    My wife is convinced I am an alcholic. I do open a bottle of wine most nights. She might have a glass but I have the rest. I love coming in after work and having a few glasses of wine. It just relaxes me. I do admit I have to finish the bottle. But I always feel ok in the morning and It doesnt seem to affect my performance at work. I would find it really hard to stop but I can stop for short periods. I could never give it up forever though which is what she wants. Am I an alcoholic? WHen do you know?
    Kieran
    One of the wisest men I know--Wyatt Webb (psychotherapist who uses horses to show people their strengths/weaknesses and a recovering alcoholic) once said- "You know you have a problem with alcohol when alcohol starts giving you problems". It's such a simple statement but it's the truth.You're an alcoholic if alcohol gets you into trouble. In other words, does it make you behave differently (e.g. nasty, mean, abrasive, violent)? Does it affect your performance in any aspect of your life? When you start drinking do you have trouble stopping? Do you black out?

  7. #7
    Super Moderator annie24's Avatar
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    There is the "CAGE" test:

    Do you Crave alcohol?
    Do you feel Angry when people ask you about your drinking?
    Do you feel Guilty after you drink?
    Do you need an Eyeopener in the mornings?

    Saying yes to 2 or more of these if you are a man is a sign you may be an alcoholic. (it is only 1 if you are a woman.)

    http://www.aa-uk.org.uk/publications/areyou.htm

    take this test also and see what your score is.

    i hope everything is ok!
    There's no place like 127.0.0.1.



  8. #8
    Super Moderator annie24's Avatar
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    http://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=186272
    I read your previous thread about your wife, no wonder you drink. Yikes. She sounds like a very controlling, domineering woman. Just because she says you are an alcoholic doesn't make you one.
    There's no place like 127.0.0.1.



  9. #9
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    How Do I know if Im an alcoholic

    Well I wanted to hear your responses before I gave you the full detial. Yes it has been negatively affecting my family life. It causes arguments and I do often black out on the sofa after drinking my bottle of wine. Im in an unhapy marriage with a very controlling and wife who verbally and emotionally abuses me. I have been drinking to ease the pain and I do like it as well!! It is a problem but I really dont want to give it up because I like it so much. THere is alcoholism in my family. My Dad drank a lot and my sister was an alcoholic before she died. Now I know that if you are advising me on the basis of my earlier posting that I have a problem, then now youll say I definitely have a problem. How do I give it up if I really dont want to? ANd if I try do I just go cold turkey? The other thing is I hate having to explain to people who know I drink socially that Im not drinking anymore. You always seem to have to explain to people. Please advise me friends.
    Kieran

  10. #10
    JadedStar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hosswhispra View Post
    One of the wisest men I know--Wyatt Webb (psychotherapist who uses horses to show people their strengths/weaknesses and a recovering alcoholic) once said- "You know you have a problem with alcohol when alcohol starts giving you problems". It's such a simple statement but it's the truth.You're an alcoholic if alcohol gets you into trouble. In other words, does it make you behave differently (e.g. nasty, mean, abrasive, violent)? Does it affect your performance in any aspect of your life? When you start drinking do you have trouble stopping? Do you black out?
    There are some people tho who have no issues from the alcohol other than heavy consumption. This is still a problem as it will kill your liver. Chronic alcoholism. I would say a bottle of wine a day is chronic even if he cannot check yes to any of the classic questions.

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