Saying the truth or brushing me off??? Ladies advice please

[mrees0077]

Hi!!!

 

Well some of you may not my situation and some of you may (previous posts)... but to be honest the advice i need her is totally new and has slightly moved on from the situation i was in... so any advice would be good, especially from women!!!

 

Anyway... so i sent a card to my girlfriend last week to say how much i miss her and how sorry i was for hurting her emotionally... She is on holiday this week (off to Dublin with a female mate for 3 days) so yesterday (i had a day off) i rang her at 9:30am (yes i know what your thinking... you should leave her to contact me) and we talked till 12:30pm... 3 HOURS ON THE PHONE!!!

 

To start off with she didn't want to get back and we did shout at each other... she said she would meet up to hand back my things but that's it... she had said that she was going to go to Dublin and meet guys and have fun with them.. and put the phone down on me!!! I then rang her back 2 minutes later (this is all in that 3 hour period) and she was a bit more calm down. She said sorry and that she didn't mean what she said about going with other guys because we only had finished 2 weeks ago and she didn't want to get involved with anyone, especially as she is not that type of girl (that i do believe)...

 

Anyway, after that we started to talk about other stuff and we were joking on the phone with each other and laughting together... in the end of the 3 hours i said to her if she could please consider about us getting back together... she said she didn't promise me that we will be while she was away in Dublin she will think about it and that she will call me on Saturday to talk when she gets back... I did ask if she wanted to meet up aswell but she said no... all she wanted was to talk on the phone.

 

Later on during the day (yesterday) i rang her up to see if she would like me to pick her and her friend (female) from the airport when they got back on Friday... she said it was no longer my responsibility... i asked her where she was and she said she was in a shop very close to where i was, so i asked her if she would like to meet up and she said yes. We met up and to sart off with she would back off everytime i tried to touch her... but then we started walking side-by-side and i grabbed her hand... she didn't seem to mind. We sat down and i carried on holding her hand... we spoke about us and to start off with she was saying there was no us but then (just before she went to catch the bus) i asked her to look in my eyes and asked if she really was going to consider about us getting back or was she just saying it to brush me off... she said she WILL consider it but didn't promise that we will... I asked her for a kiss but she said no, so i kissed her on her cheek and said that i will love her forever... she said she would call me on Saturday and got on the bus.

 

 

So what do you think? Is she saying the truth or is she stringing me along?... i mean if it wasn't for that initial point of contact that i made on the phone, i wouldn't have seen her (she accepted to see me) and she wouldn't be calling me on Saturday and considering our future together!

 

What do you think?

[buffalosoldier]

i hate to say this,but she is stringing you along.

 

you've pulled out all the stops for this girl,making the moves for everything,the kiss,the holding hands,the getting back together,everything that i have read.its been GIVE,GIVE,GIVE from you and TAKE,TAKE,TAKE from her. and i think you should stop it before she really makes a fool out of you and hurts you more.

 

to be honest,shes probably enjoying the attention without having to do anything for it.-and you shouldnt give her the satisfaction.you have asked her back,bombarded her with affection and love,now i think you should leave it at that,you need to preserve some of your dignity. i hope this doesnt sound too harsh by the way,sorry if it does but i thought you would prefer some honest replys.

 

i also think that if you give her some space,she will be far more likely to accept,because she wont know for certain that you are at her every beck and call.by smothering her,you are preventing her from thinking for herself and having the chance to make a clear and consise decision,which in the long run is what you really want aswell isnt it? i doubt very much that you want to be chasing after this girl for the rest of your days not knowing whether she really wants you or not.

 

you've had your go at winning her back,now let her decide for herself,let her do some chasing if that is the case,she'll respect you a lot more for giving her space to breathe.if its meant to be you have nothing to worry about.

 

wish you luck!!! xxx

[sabena]

I think she is stringing you along, but not intentionally. She is probably so overwhelmed by you smoothering her and contacting and maybe even desperation that she is a little scared to say no outright and feels a little guilty to.

 

But then I may be wrong...you need to give her time and space and I know for a fact that you aren't doing that. You need to know that what you are doing could push her away instead of bringing her close.

 

Take care and good luck

[reneesmummy]

whatever the next move may be do not be the one making it.just leave things as they stand,if you speak to her on sat go from there but if she dont phone dont respond to it. btw I agree with the replies you have received.

[persephonesleeps]

wow...slow down!

she said she would call you on Saturday, give her the chance to do so.

You are acting like you don't trust her...and I'm sure she can sense that.

 

Be patient, distract yourself, post on here, talk with friends, sleep, do whatever it takes to lay off for a bit.

 

If I were her, I'd be running scared! You are pushing too much...I know you don't mean to, but seriously, she might be worried you are going to get obsessive or something!

 

Try to relax...trust that everthing will be as it should be.

You cannot force a relationship...it has to have room to breathe and grow and develop naturally.

 

If she doesn't call on Saturday, wait at least 3 more days to give her the chance to call. If you still haven't heard from her, then I say go ahead and call her.

 

Don't pressure her or harass her about why she didn't call...don't even bring it up. Just be cool and casual and calm! If she is ready to talk, she will talk...if she tries to get off the phone right away, you might want to give up for awhile.

[thaj]

Im sorry to say this, but I dont think she wants to get back together with you. I think shes agreeing to consider it and talking for hours to make you feel a bit better. You are doing all the calling, and bringing up the subject of getting back together. I think shes just trying to soften the blow. Try not to call her, spend some time with friends and family, and you will slowly get over her.