yet another "does he like me" post :P

[randomgirl59]

hehe...this feels kinda weird, but I'd really appreciate any advice..

 

there's this guy in my class that I've liked for a long time. The first time I talked to him was in my first year where he worked, I ordered a drink and was short a dollar, so he payed it off, I offered to pay it back but he told me not to bother. Shortly after this I found out from a friend that he had a girlfriend back home. This obviously sucked for me.

 

Now we're in our second year and he's in my class, this was tough for me because I still like him. We have talked on many occasions and I've gotten a chance to get to know him. He's really friendly, and talked a lot. He's always been really nice to me, holding doors, lending me CD's..once he gave me a ride home. Another he sat beside me in class when he always sits with his friends. I also caught him looking at me in class..it was actual eye contact, he looked away as soon as I caught him.

 

Anyway, I had found out from a friend who knows I like him that he broke up with his girlfriend over our break. I've still been aprehensive because I know that this doesnt mean anything, plus he's probably still getting over the relationship. He's also never said anything to me, so I dont think he knows that I know. I dont even think I'm supposed to know!

 

Here's the problem though. It's always me who has to start the conversations. The most he'll say to me is a hi or a grin in the hallway or something. When we do talk for longer its nice, we usually talk about music since we both like some of the same bands. He always recommends me music. It's hard to talk to him cuz he's always with his friends. But I just found out that he was talking to 2 of my friends yesterday. Whenever I see him, he rarely talks to other girls. When I see him talking to other girls, I get nervous sometimes because these girls are more confident than i am..

 

I feel that if he was interested, he would start a conversation for once, not always me. Is it wrong of me to think this? I'm almost 100% sure that he knows how I feel...I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut about these things so a lot of my friends know. I dont want to over-analyze anything though.

 

I'm a very shy person when it comes to guys I like. I have no problem talking to guys I see as friends...maybe he thinks I'm not interested in him because I can talk to his friends without feeling shy, but when it comes to him, I clam up.

 

Anyways..any imput is helpful. My main issue with this is that I dont want to make a move until i'm sure that he likes me in more than just a friendly way. I've got 2 more years in this program, I dont want to make it akward.

 

thanks for your help!

[Jayar]

If he likes you, he'll initiate contact. Be careful who you talk to because believe me, if some of your friends like him, they'll make you sound bad in front of him when you are not around. Young girls are just like that quite often.

 

They wouldn't say "you know she really likes you but is shy..." it would be more like "she's stupid over you, you know that? Yeah, this one time she talked about how blue your EYES were, isn't that retarded?!"

 

Why? Because girls at a young age are often insecure, and the way insecure individuals build their own confidence at that age is by putting down and making fun of others. They aren't conscious of it.

 

So yeah, be nice to him, be around, be attractive, and if he wants you he'll come get you. And shut up about him to your friends! Maybe talk to one special best friend who you know you can trust.

[Boughs]

You see him anywhere else but class? like a party? parties are great because it shows you are free spirited if that is the kind of girl he wants. If you party, just go over to him even if he has friends and just talk with him and ask if you can tag along... he'll get the hint, and it'll be cool just be fun... just stay nearer him. Don't be concerned if its awkward... making a move can be hot. especially if you are cool with his friends... you have a bunch of girl friends that would meet his friends? maybe there could be intermingling (rare from my opinion)

[randomgirl59]

that's what I think too, that he'd initiate contact once in a while..the only time he intruded was when I was talking to another guy

 

thanks for your advice!

[randomgirl59]

You see him anywhere else but class? like a party? parties are great because it shows you are free spirited if that is the kind of girl he wants. If you party, just go over to him even if he has friends and just talk with him and ask if you can tag along... he'll get the hint, and it'll be cool just be fun... just stay nearer him. Don't be concerned if its awkward... making a move can be hot. especially if you are cool with his friends... you have a bunch of girl friends that would meet his friends? maybe there could be intermingling (rare from my opinion)

 

I never see him outside of school, he always takes off after class. The only time I saw him outside of school was at the mall with other friends, we talked then and thats how I managed to get a ride back with him...I dont think he's the partying type, but I'll keep an ear out..thanks for the advice

[ghost69]

he wants his cake and eat it too. he wants you to want him but doesn't want to be with you sounds like.

[Batya33]

Given your mutual interest in music any way of inviting him to a concert or to hear some music somewhere - in a casual way.

[randomgirl59]

ghost, this crossed my mind too, unfortunately

[scotty77]

The fact he never initiates a conversation despite the fact that you have initiated conversations isn't a very good sign in my opinion.Since you initiated a conversation with him it should be obvious to him that you might be interested .I wouldn't ask him out.Perhaps you should subtly not initiate as many conversations with him just to see if he might be the one to talk to you.I wouldn't just assume he is shy because I am very shy but if a woman were to initiate a conversation with me,if I was interested in her I know that I would be starting conversations with her.

[ghost69]

either that or he doesn't want everyone knowing he is attracted to you. like he is embarrassed or something.

[Altruist]

Classic signs of a shy guy in love. He probably likes you but gets nervous around you. That's why he can't initiate conversations with you. As someone already suggested, try inviting him to a music concert. That's the only way that you can at least know how he feels about you.

[ghost69]

i don't think this is shyness. if he liked you enough he wouldn't care who saw. she said he talks a lot and seems very interactive with others and his friends.

[randomgirl59]

Yesterday I just ignored him completely. He was being more of a class clown than usual..I'm pretty sure he was trying to get my attention. One of his friends sat beside me twice this week when he always sits with him. I dunno, he is really hard to read...on one hand, he's really open and funny, yet he mostly talks with guys...when he talks to me, and other girls, he's more reserved i think..

 

I think he's playing games..

[ghost69]

maybe he's just immature. let him approach you if for anything further.