skate Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 I said to myself if we ever got back together i would come back and write to everyone...so it's been months since I last wrote and was miserably depressed w/o my ex (now bf again). I wanted to do this to basically give what i have learned, but maybe i should start w/ how it happened (in case ppl are wondering). Long story short, I was at the point that i was going to finally let go and get rid of every reminder I had of him, meaning getting rid of stuff and returning things. But he wasn't ready to let me go! Well things happen and it's like those stresses you get in the early stages of dating wondering what's going on, some good things happen, some BAD. But now, through all the things we went through together I feel that some of major things that occurred in the last while were meant to happen and have possibly brought us closer together. Hard to believe that it does happen. I kept trying to convince myself that it was all supposed to make me a better person or that there was some lesson to learn. Now just the other day he told me that he loves me more than he ever has before! I want to let some people know that there is hope to get back w/ your ex...i know i was desperately searching these forums for a story like this. But you have to really be honest w/ yourself and see how your relationship and love was before. In my heart I knew he really loved me and cared for me and thankfully he was never dishonest thru our breakup. It's so hard not to read into what they say or do, but compare it to how it was when you were together. I learned to understand that everyone expresses their love differently and it is not comparable and there is no right and wrong. I learned to be honest and try to control my feelings by waiting a day or at least writing it out. And it DOES push them away when you are constantly sad, there can never be any constructive talking and nothing is ever fun. I realized that what i thought was lack of effort or compassion was not that at all, but i was stuck in how i felt things SHOULD be setting myself up for disappointment. I don't know if what i've said makes sense or is helpful, but I just want to be able to give something back to people. I consider myself very lucky to be one of the few to reunite w/ their ex's and remain w/ them. It's been about 4 months or so and he surprised me the other day by deciding to take me out for our (orginal) anniversary, one that we've never ever celebrate b/c we've never thought it was a big deal. It was such a nice surprise and i see how much he is trying to make it work this time. I think there are a lot of breakups where there is still a lot of love but maybe something is strong enough to hold them back...I guess we just have to be understanding that they are hurting and trying too. They are also doing what they feel is best for them and you. Take care everyone! Link to comment
robowarrior Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Im happy for you that things landed on their feet again. Hopefully you two will have a long term invested love into eachother. Link to comment
skyjuice Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Hi Great to hear that. Hope that both of you work things through and understand what went wrong, and solve them together. Link to comment
mikeca Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 I wish you the best in 07' and on! Link to comment
dontknowwhattodo Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 it DOES push them away when you are constantly sad, there can never be any constructive talking and nothing is ever fun. It is very true!! Link to comment
LLammas Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Your story gives me hope. Good luck to you both. Link to comment
harmonious Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 I am so happy for you! And so proud of you for what you have been through. I'm in week 2 of my breakup right now, and I'm realizing I need to be able to move past the hurt and sadness if I want to remain friends with my ex (which I do, very much, as we were best friends before we dated). I wish we could get back together one day, although I have to admit to myself it may never happen. But stories like yours are still incredibly inspirational. Thank you, and I wish your so much happiness in your resumed relationship! Link to comment
wishiknew Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Glad to see there are still happy endings out there. All the best to you Link to comment
skate Posted January 16, 2007 Author Share Posted January 16, 2007 wow, thanks for all the support guys! I just want to be there to help and give some hope to ppl (not false hope). I truly believe that i learned a lot about relationships during that time. i spent a lot of time w/ my friends and learning about other relationships, breakups.. i actually have some great advice ...hehe...i'm just not so good at taking it...it's always harder when you are going thru it, i know. Please feel free to talk to me if you need! Link to comment
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