She forgot Christmas?

[jmitch2180]

hey everyone. im new to this, i just joined tonight because i need some advice.

 

First, let me tell you a little about myself. I'm a 22 year old college student in CT and I play ice hockey for my school. I'm a pretty good looking guy (not to sound full of myself) and I've been dating my girlfriend for a year and a half. I love her a lot, she's been through a lot in her life, and I know she loves me.

 

That being said, her and I get along fairly well. We bicker sometimes and disagree on a good amount of things, but always love to cuddle up and go to sleep together. Sometimes she's hard to communicate with, though. She's very into money, and always has to have the best of the best. When she shops, she looks at the price tag before the actual product. I, on the other hand, am a guy of bargains. I look for the cheaper deals and settle for mediocre. I drive my 1998 Accord that I plan on running into the ground, and she drives a 2005 BMW 330i. I'm in my second relationship, and this is her first serious relationship. She's a year older than I am.

 

Today's Christmas. I put a lot of thought into her gift, and I ended up getting her a massage at a local spa, a North Face jacket, a nice ankle bracelet and some scratch-offs. We planned to exchange gifts today (she lives 25 mins away) but she text-messaged me last night to ask if we could do it a different day. Fine by me.

 

We didn't see each other today, which is unfortunate but again, fine. I called her around 1pm, she said she had to go because she was getting ready, and at 12midnight, I still haven't heard from her. Being Christmas, I feel kinda shafted.

 

Do I have a right to feel upset, or am I being a wimp? Is not talking to your sig. other on Christmas odd?

 

Please help me out here.

[annie24]

welcome to enotalone.

 

hm. is she ok? like, not in the hospital or something? when you finally hear from her, she'd better have a good explanation why she didn't contact you! i think it's pretty unacceptable to do that to a SO on christmas, she sounds rather flakey.

 

how is your relationship otherwise?

[jmitch2180]

welcome to enotalone.

 

hm. is she ok? like, not in the hospital or something? when you finally hear from her, she'd better have a good explanation why she didn't contact you! i think it's pretty unacceptable to do that to a SO on christmas, she sounds rather flakey.

 

how is your relationship otherwise?

 

The relationship is fine. I see her 4 times a week, I usually stay at her place. We have our disagreements, but what couple doesn't?

 

She's alright. I was chatting online with her roommate who spoke with her an hour ago and she was still home with family.

 

She just has a mind of her own, I guess.

[annie24]

um, so why did she blow you off? did you just ask her directly?

[jmitch2180]

um, so why did she blow you off? did you just ask her directly?

 

Just got a text that said "family just left, call me".

 

I guess she couldn't call me with her family around.....

 

sucks because both of my bothers spent all day with their girlfriends. I barely spoke with mine.

 

I hope I don't sound like a complaining fool.

[jmitch2180]

her explanation: "I was insanely busy all day with family. I drank tonight, too"

 

Good excuse? Yea? no?

[annie24]

erm.... no. If you two had plans to meet, I don't think it's ok to just blow them off. she could have called. she was insanely busy drinking. yeah, always a great excuse

[jmitch2180]

 

 

thanks for the adive, annie.

 

Hope you had a great holiday. I'm sure i'll be back...

[annie24]

well, let's see what other people think.......

 

I am sorry you are going through this. something to think about.... do you want to spend the rest of your life with a woman who buys stuff that costs $$$$$ and is always looking at the label? that's great if you are going into a career where you will be rich and travel in high society, but if you are an everyday guy, maybe that is not a lifestyle you would like or be able to afford...

[jmitch2180]

well, let's see what other people think.......

 

I am sorry you are going through this. something to think about.... do you want to spend the rest of your life with a woman who buys stuff that costs $$$$$ and is always looking at the label? that's great if you are going into a career where you will be rich and travel in high society, but if you are an everyday guy, maybe that is not a lifestyle you would like or be able to afford...

 

she comes from a very wealthy family (her father is a CEO) and money isn't an object. If I were to stay with her, I'd be all set.

 

Money isn't everything to me though. I look at people before their possessions.

[HellFrost666]

Drinking is no excuse. I don't even celebrate Christmas, but I think I would be mad if my girlfriend blew me off on any day and drinking was the excuse.

[MacGyverRI]

She's very into money, and always has to have the best of the best. When she shops, she looks at the price tag before the actual product. I, on the other hand, am a guy of bargains. I look for the cheaper deals and settle for mediocre. I drive my 1998 Accord that I plan on running into the ground, and she drives a 2005 BMW 330i. I'm in my second relationship, and this is her first serious relationship. She's a year older than I am.

 

I think her family wouldn't approve so that's why she has kept away. I also wouldn't get too attached unless you're planning on getting a very high paying job.

[Aurian]

I second that her family doesn't approve somehow. Otherwise, she could have snuck away for a bit and talked with you on Christmas, no? Seems a bit off that she didn't spend any time with you despite the plans.

 

Sounds like a talk is in order...

[No, useYOURname]

I have felt the awful shock and pain of the worst so I know what I'm about to say. Not that I think I am 100% correct, I'm just saying be prepared.

 

She is not as serious as you. She may have another guy she's seeing and if her parents even give a crap about her and her relationships, I bet they don't know or care to know much about you.

 

My ex was very wealthy. They didn't flash it around like hip-hop moguls, but they definitely had nice stuff and plenty of it. Plenty of it. Basically my ex's father made his millions by concentrating on business year after year and my ex grew up in an environment of feeling 2nd rate to her father, sister, etc. Your situation seems awfully familiar. Is your gf selfish? Does she pour on the affection sometimes and seem distant at the drop of a hat? Are there other instances in your relationship that just don't add up? Try asking her a definite easy to answer but serious question. If she answers with some off the wall nonsense then press her with another question. If the answers just get worse and worse and more outrageous then find a new girlfriend.

[pistolp]

I've been in that same situation with an Ex. I ended up becoming her convenient boyfriend. She wanted to be a single girl with a boyfriend. She liked having me around, but didn’t like the responsibilities of the relationship. She just didn’t want to grow up at the time.

 

I’d have a talk with her and keep your eyes open.

 

If you smell burning toast, most likely it is.

 

Later.