Depressed..

[Jon_K]

Well, been a long time "Reader" first time poster.

 

I've been using computers all my life as an escape from the real world. It's to the point where its all I do. I quit school because of it, I don't ever even go out anymore. I'm a hermit.

 

I want to get out into the world again and make use of my life... GED's will be available soon and I'll get one of those.... what should I do meanwhile to help face the world head on with my depression?

 

I take anti depressants, but.... I used the computer to further get away frm depression... now I want to get out of my severe addiction to the computer... what would you guys suggest?

 

I'm 18, living at home with parents.

 

Thanks!

[blonde]

Hi Jon,

I think it will be very hard to get your way out of that on your own and I really think you should ask someone for help. If you are taking meds I guess you do counselling already, if not, start it now. Or you could call the local youth help hotline which should be in the yellow pages.

For a start, you could also look for an activity, maybe at a sports center or a painting group or whatever where you go to on a regular basis at least one hour a week.

Hope that helped a little.

b.

[Turboz]

Hi

 

I've suffered from some of the symptoms you described. If you wanna PM me sometime then go for it.

 

Likewise if you wanna email me: email removed

[BazookaMike]

Hey I'm 21 and I can totally relate. As cliché as this sounds, you are not alone. I also dropped out of college at 18. Are you just skipping high school or did you rather falling out of college? I'm glad you are reaching for help. I know this isn't an easy thing to do, and everyone has to find their own way. The only thing to do is get out there. Seriously it is the only way. I know that isn't easy but you've got to do it. Now is always the best time to start anything.

 

I had always been so shy growing up. I felt like I was always on the receiving end. I grew up in a strict church and we didn't participate in popular holidays didn't go out on couldn't go out on Friday nights etc. It really had a negative effect on me. Instead of learning to confront people I would instead try to avoid situations altogether I didn't want to talk about it. It got real hard because eventually everyone knew I was different. Plus I had red hair so I'd always get derogatory comments from people for example; Red, carrot-top, big red. They knew me simply by these titles, not known for who I was. I would distance myself a school as a survival instinct and that even continued on to high school and after the first semester of college I dropped out. This is my first semester in two years that I'm taking more then one class at a time. Anyway this isn't the point I'm trying to get at...

 

I'm going to admit something, up until almost a year now I would be so afraid to talk to people. It wasn't that I didn't want to it was because I didn't have anything to say because I was always playing video games in my spare time, it was my escape. I'd put so many hours on my games it was embarrassing to try and talk to people, especially girls because I had no life the games sucked it all up. I'd work part-time and go home and play games that was my life. It was holding me back socially just like the church did when I was young.

 

The thing that woke me up from from all of this was previous gf. She called me out of the blue almost a year ago come this September. We had met summer 2000 at my summer job right out of HS. She had a simple crush on me for some reason, nothing special she'd crush on about anything. When I talked with her I didn't feel so different anymore. She even asked me out, but her dad didn't approve and she had to take it back she felt bad about it. She was a seventh day Adventist, similar to what my church before the change. She had to leave and finish her last year of HS. She just kind of left me in the cold, I thought she was gone for good. I kept doubting the fact that she might have really liked me. She was really cute, I'm not going to go into details but she had some personal battles the had yet to fight herself.

 

Anyway I was got do infatuated with her after she left, I'd think about her all the time. I even called her a few times at the dorm, trying to figure out if she still liked me. We never hooked-up until last September and we only lasted 4 months, but it was a total learning experience for me. I was a late bloomer similar to you. As you can imagine I got so attached to her, I never totally got over her in the first place. She just didn't understand how I would want her so bad, she got scared. Personally think she was only lonely and looking an easy bf. The relationship wasn't real involved physically, I set some boundries out of respect for her. I was still shy in public and never really took her out. I don't regret anything I was still learning after all, but I don't think she realized how innocent I really was. unfortunately I was so dependent on her I just couldn't give her space and a salvageable relationship simply collapsed, these months after our break-up have been the hardest time of my life. I've had to learn to let go. Just like I learned to share myself with her. But even now she's gone its like I'm finally alive, I'm not hiding my emotions from people anymore and I'm not afraid of what they think of me. I strike up conversations with girls at school. My part time job is at a retail outlet, and I just naturally strike up conversations with people It surprises even myself.

 

Whoa, I've said too much. I don't think you should try to get a gf to learn all of this, mine was just a lucky-break that worked in my favor. These are the important things to know they are what helped me. But you are in control and its your turn.

 

Get comfortable with yourself, buy some nice clothes they make a big difference. Try asking the girls on the board advice if you need help with brands/styles. If you are comfortable with yourself, guys will respect you and ladies will like you. When you talk to people look them in the eyes, don't look at the ground.

 

Don't be afraid to write things off, if you hit a bump along the way, learn from it and keep going towards your goal. Set your attention only on things that deserve or require it. It not let it be and move elsewhere. If you pour your energy into things that don't appreciated it you will become drained. So know when to let it go. This transition won't happen overnight, but its shouldn't take a long time only lots of effort. Good luck I hope all of this made sense and that it is relative to your personal situation.

 

-bazook

[Jon_K]

Yeah.. I dropped out of high school due to my addiction, and I plan on getting a general education and going on to college, but i want to take care of these problems before i do this

[Jon_K]

Yeah... any more suggestions? I think I'm going to start going to bowling alleys and such... see if I can't socialize some... god this is going to be hired.... well I dug my ditch... time to climb out... any other suggestions anyone?

[Gunther]

you can get a girl friend they'll get you out of the house LoL okay I'm just teazin', but yes, I know all about depression, depression is hard to deal with but only in the most sever cases is it nessasary to take anti-depressant. what I would suggest is that you do a few things this is the list -> 1. get exersize, it is proven that this will increase the hormones that you may well need to be able to feel better about yourself and your life. 2. if your not on a normal schedual then you must take steps to do so. 3. you must eat regular foods, I dont mean a diet by the way, I mean eat hamburger {not the kind on a bun} steaks, ham, vegtables, fruit, ect. it is easier to maintain a diet of a steak a potato and some beans than it is to have a salad and grape juice for every mean LoL. 4.you must meet with people your own age OUTSIDE THE INTERNET!, and finally 5.Have fun, if you have something imparticular you like to do for cryin' out loud do it! hmm... actualy a girl friend might not be a bad idea LoL

[thehaunted123]

I also use the computer a lot and my social life isnt too big.

 

Disconnect your computer, I mean every wire from the back of your tower. Go downtown and look for a part time job, youll get to know people, and earn some money.