WHY THE HELL DOES IT HURT SO MUCH?

[Finzsoftie]

Can anybody please please please inform me of this!

I started to go out with my partner 2 and a half years ago. We had the wildest time together. I even rejected my family over him in a way that my parents did not want us to be together. We moved to a different city after I had an abortion and by that stage my parents already semi approved. I loved the guy, and he promised me the entire world.

After our move he started to cheat on me and physically abuse me, I thought that this is normal after all he was not from around this country. I thought it was the culture, and i locked myself. After he hit me and my parents saw one day when i cam back hom they decided not to let me go back. However, after a month i returned to where we lived, got back to my job, and got back together with my ex.

This just got worse and worse and worse, by the end of the year i was starving myself and he was cheating and never wanted to see me.

Every time he felt that i was slipping away, he'd come crawling back on his knees. But his rudeness and abuse never seemed to stop.

Why is it like this? This is not fair at all.

I left him earlier on in the year, after i had a miscarriage.

I loved him but understood that nothing could happen between us. I left the city, and didnt speak to him for a few months. Recently he saw me. He chased me down the motorway, and for a month or so, he tried to prove to me that he wanted to make it work and that he had changed.

But this time I didnt believe him. I knew it wouldnt have worked. But what i dont understand is when i was nice to him when he came back, we even got back together and he was nice, yet i kept my distance. But why is it that everytime that I get more attached to him, he pushes me away?

Doesnt he understand that he will regret it later?

Or is that too much? Every time he finds someone he does this?

Why is my pure love for him take to this?

Why is he like this?

WHen am I going to get on with it? And what can I do to stop everything, and why does it still hurt?

Any suggestions?[/b]

[tobigahart]

Hey there! You have to understand that this problem has absolutely nothing at all to do with you! This guy (however much you love him) is a very insecure and unhappy person. He has some major problems in life and is using you to hide them behind.

 

He might love you and care about you alot but before he expects to have a meaningful relationship with anyone he is going to have to look after himself. There is no excuse ever for cheating or abusing and no person should ever have to tolerate this.

 

definitely leave this guy behind. And yes it will hurt, but he is not ready for a relationship with you or with anyone else... You deserve someone who cares about you alot more than this guy did and someone who will look after you and make your needs and happiness a priority.

 

I hope you can understand what I am trying to say and I hope you can do what's best for you and leave this guy behind. He has his own problems which he needs to sort out by himself.

[Finzsoftie]

But the thing is that I was not an angel either in this relationship.

Its like when he is nice, I am mean as I cant forgive him for all he has done, when I am nice, he is rude and mean and he cant forgive me for the way i treated him previously.

 

A few nights ago, he asked me, where did we go wrong. My answer stood well maybe it's just the people that we are. But as for seriously I have no idea.

 

I dont know, i just want him, when Im with him Im miserable, when im without him im miserable also!

 

Why say something that you will regret later?

THE STUPID FOOL!