arguements

[nadineboyo]

I spoke with the ex this morning after 12 days of NC and he said he's kinda happy with the way things are, with us not talking and he was tired of all the arguments and nagging. but at the same time, he misses my company. I requested a meeting so we could clear the air and he said he is not available till next week. I think he's going out of town to see the girl he is talking to. He said that he feels that we are on different pages and its just a huge mess. I told him that i believe communication is the problem bcos all these problems did not start till about 8 weeks ago. we did not finfish the conversation cos i was at work and i told him to call me later. I dont know what to do. Do i go back to NC or is there still hope? How do i defend the arguments and suppossed nagging?

[Tj williams]

hey how are you doing? i hope better then me haha but anyways. im sure you want it to work and you want to continue to try but from what it looks like maybe doing nc is the best choice. you know the only way to heal a broken heart is to give it time. he said that he is kinda happy that you guys are doing this. thats a sign of just letting him go.

[Alezia]

That's the horrible part of these break-ups is you can only see one side of it, yours The mis-communication might have been a result of something larger.. ex: if he has developped feelings for this other girl you mention of, maybe he didn't feel like working on the relationship as much as he used to etc..

 

I would suggest continuing NC since he doesn't seem interested more than that in pursuing you, especially if someone else is in the picture(although I think you mention you aren't sure). If you stop talking for a while, the tension of the arguments will probably ease up and it will be easier to communicate... if you keep bringing back the same old subject over and over I think it's just going to cause you more frustration and it will seem like it's not going anywhere!

[nadineboyo]

should i still talk to him about it cos like i mentioned, we did not finfish the discussion and said we' ll also meet next week to talk about it. is there still a need for this.

[flower99]

That's the horrible part of these break-ups is you can only see one side of it, yours The mis-communication might have been a result of something larger.. ex: if he has developped feelings for this other girl you mention of, maybe he didn't feel like working on the relationship as much as he used to etc..

 

I would suggest continuing NC since he doesn't seem interested more than that in pursuing you, especially if someone else is in the picture(although I think you mention you aren't sure). If you stop talking for a while, the tension of the arguments will probably ease up and it will be easier to communicate... if you keep bringing back the same old subject over and over I think it's just going to cause you more frustration and it will seem like it's not going anywhere!

 

I agree with this.

and I don't think there is much point to finish the conversation....if it hasn't ended in the last 8 weeks, I'm not sure if it ever will...but one thing I'm sure of is if you do finish it, it won't be the kind of ending you are hoping for.

But to bring it back up again with him I believe he will see as nagging and argueing.

I agree with the others to go with NC.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

it sounds like you want to 'fix' the problems and continue the relationship, and he's made it clear he's happier not doing that... he's also blowing you off when you try to reschedule to continue the conversation, so i think he's moved on, and you should too... if you think it will help you get closure you could talk to him again, but it really sounds like he's not interested it that, so it might just prolong your pain.