So after 2-1/2 weeks of NC

[rockon83]

I had been thinking to purposely run into her...at first, so she would see me, and maybe remember things... I wouldn't say anything more than hi.... more recently, I've been thinking to run into her simply to see her, and see if I have any feelings left for her...

 

So after 2-1/2 weeks of strict NC, this morning she texted me. "i don't want to bother you, just hoping you had a good time in cleveland and that everything is ok with your mom." as i went to see fam in cleveland for thanksgiving, and my mom had surgery... both of these things which she had known about before the NC period...

 

I didn't reply... but it just makes me wonder.. I mean, I'm glad I'm on her mind I guess. She's been on mine nonstop... Is this any sort of a good sign at all?

 

I'm thinking I may end up runnning into her this weekend, as I'll be staying with a good friend of mine who lives near her. If I do, and she tries talking to me, I guess I just be polite and say I'm in a rush?

[heloladies21]

Don't read into the false hope, this is a very common thing for the dumper to do. It's usually to ease their guilt of dumping you, but one thing is certain, there is no reason to believe that it is a sign that she's considering getting back together with you.

 

As for the contact games, my advice is to skip em as they have been proven not to work. Even if you see temporary results, things always revert back to the previous state as the underlying issues have not been resolved. Best thing you could do if you see her/talk to her again is to skip the small talk, let your intentions be known, and if you two can't come to an agreement (ie. get back into a relationship again), then let her know you're not interested in keeping in touch as it will only hold you back from moving on and lead to your pain.

[jerk chicken]

I dont think this proves she still has feelings, she was prob just being polite. You shouldn't play games if u see her just be civil.

[mikeca]

I'd keep up NC a bit longer than 2 1/2 weeks. Re-evaluate yourself down the road and see where your at on 1 month...or longer and see if its worth it then.

[rockon83]

Well if I do run into her this weekend, how's this:

 

If and when you're ready for an exclusive relationship, let me know, I'd love to give us another try... Otherwise, as much as I'd like to, I can't remain in contact with you, as I still need to get over my feelings for you.

[heloladies21]

Better would be not to state it like an ultimatum. You want her to come back to you only if she wants to, not because of the fear of losing you. So do it like this, "I still have feelings for you and want to be in and work at a relationship with you. (feel free to add in any of the other emotions you feel for her at this point, get it all off your chest) then ask her "Do you want to give this another shot right now?" Then hear what she has to say, but if you get anything other than an outright yes, then it's a no and then you say "well i'm not interested in waiting around/being friends with you (it depends on exactly what she says), so I'd prefer if we stay out of touch."