Yvette84 Posted November 19, 2006 Share Posted November 19, 2006 Hello, well for those of you that didn't read my last post, I met this guy who is SOOOO sweet and great! the thing is I don't wanna get involved in another relationship right now. We do like each other though. he knows where I stand. So we hung out saturday and I wanna hang out with him again. When I left he said "I hope we can hang out again" but he's VERY shy! anyways, my question is should I call him and ask him to hang out tomorrow??? is it too soon??? too forward??? would it be giving him the wrong impression or moving too fast??? should I wait for him??? help! ](*,) Link to comment
annie24 Posted November 19, 2006 Share Posted November 19, 2006 what do you feel like doing? i mean, not getting into a relationship and calling him tonight to meet up tomorrow might be seen as giving a mixed message. I think figure out what you want, and go for it Link to comment
jilligirl Posted November 19, 2006 Share Posted November 19, 2006 Wait, when you said "he knows where I stand," do you mean that he knows you're not looking for a relationship? Or did you mean that he knows that you're into him? If it was the former, then I'd say don't call him because you'll be sending him mixed signals. If it's the latter, well, I don't know. It's good to show him that you're interested and all. I'd call him, but I'd try not to let it become one-sided where YOU are the one who's always doing the calling because he's too shy to call you. Link to comment
Yvette84 Posted November 20, 2006 Author Share Posted November 20, 2006 Wait, when you said "he knows where I stand," do you mean that he knows you're not looking for a relationship? Or did you mean that he knows that you're into him? If it was the former, then I'd say don't call him because you'll be sending him mixed signals. If it's the latter, well, I don't know. It's good to show him that you're interested and all. I'd call him, but I'd try not to let it become one-sided where YOU are the one who's always doing the calling because he's too shy to call you. well both. He knows i don't wanna get too involved right now. But he also knows I like him. Link to comment
atraceofblood Posted November 20, 2006 Share Posted November 20, 2006 I'd be flattered if a girl called even though I knew she didn't want a bf, but I still liked her! As long as he knows where you stand, it shouldn't matter. You gotta be friends too right? Life shouldn't be so hard like this! Link to comment
Batya33 Posted November 20, 2006 Share Posted November 20, 2006 Since you're not dating I don't see any harm in calling. I am not sure it makes sense that he is "too shy" to call you again as he seemed from your description to be outgoing while on the date with you, asking for a hug, and acting in a very flirtatious way with you - definitely not signs of a shy person, in my humble opinion. if he is not calling it may be because he is not in the same place as you - he has decided he wants to spend time with someone who is ready for a relationship and you have made it clear you are not. Be careful about sending him mixed messages or believing that he is not calling because he is "too shy." Link to comment
Yvette84 Posted November 20, 2006 Author Share Posted November 20, 2006 I know he likes me alot because of the way he was acting and he told me he really likes me but he didn't wanna "speak for me". meaning he knows I like him in some way but he's not sure how far I wanna take this. I think he wouldn't call because he's unsure of where I'm at and doesn't wanna pressure me or seem to clingy already, ya know, like over step my boundries? he may wanna take this at my timing.... it was just yesterday we spent time together. But he was the one bringing up wanting to spend time together again and really liking me and all that, but I mean....can't I call him up to hang out as a friend without sending mixed signals??? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted November 20, 2006 Share Posted November 20, 2006 Yes you can call him but to be totally fair to him you have to tell him that you only want to be platonic friends at this point and you hope he is comfortable with that. Then, while you are hanging out, you should try to avoid flirting and if he tries to pay for you, it's ok to accept if he insists but as long as he knows you do not consider this a "date." There is a part of this where you are playing with fire - you obviously like him more than in a friend way, he probably does too so there will be a real limit to how far this "friendship" can go before one of you wants to take it further. Link to comment
Yvette84 Posted November 20, 2006 Author Share Posted November 20, 2006 he just texted me "Hey beautiful, I miss you already"!!!!! ahhhh! what kind of friendship is this?? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted November 20, 2006 Share Posted November 20, 2006 Answer- it is not. It is your job to be very clear with him. Sounds like you are enjoying the flattery, flirting and attention - that is fine, just decide how much you care about his feelings v. the fun you are having. if the former, you will tell him he needs to back off other than platonic friendship because you are not "ready." From your posts, with all due respect, it sounds like you are ready - or at least you are behaving like you are ready and giving him some signs that you are, as well. Link to comment
whoops Posted November 20, 2006 Share Posted November 20, 2006 you are ready - dont hold back give it a go you are young what you got to loose you like him he likes you so why not Link to comment
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