Why Is it all about Games?!?

[NyGentleman]

Ok so here is my dilemma...Went to a party in which i was invited by a girl that i recently got very close with over the past month and half...the back story we have been only friends for over 2 yrs...all of a sudden we both break up in our relationships and realize there is something there for the both of us feeling wise...Things have been very up and down....

 

So anyway went to the party things were ok, party was kinda lame...but we ended up getting intimate..very intimate...well this would be the second time if anyone is counting and well, just like the first, in the same environment it wasnt that great...this is something that ive never experienced before in my life and i dont understand why now, with a girl who i think is abosolutely beautiful...well we talked about it afterwards and realized maybe we are putting to much pressure on that...we later talked for sometime on the phone and everything was fine...

 

The next day, weirdness, no calls, no contact, and when we did finally talk, very little to say except im extremely tired...this coming from two people who could talk for hours about nothing...the only thing i know is that i think she may have run into the ex again somewhere she went but im not positive...this would be a cause of that weirdness, but with our little problem and that i feel as if i am losing the battle that was just about won....

 

Questions: How can the intimate part be happening, when everything else is so great....i didnt think much of it last night cause there was so much goin on, but today with the minor contact (by me calling only) is making me think something isnt right and i hope its not bc of that....its so hard to comprehend right now bc ive liked her for so long...and finally its in front of me....to some degree anyway...i just hope that our actions or lack of isnt leading her back to the ex...bc than even though we crossed over that friendship line, everything would be lost...

[Cenobyte]

How long has it been since she broke up with her ex? If it hasn't been that long, maybe she is feeling guilty for hooking up with you so soon after she split up with him. Maybe she is also feeling guilty because she was with you on the rebound, and she thinks that she doesn't want to hurt you by having a rebound relationship with you, which sometimes don't go so well.

[NyGentleman]

Its been a decent amount of time for the both of us in terms of breaking it off from the ex (about a month-month & half) ..Things have been great for awhile now for both of us but once in awhile like yesterday, things just get strange for no reason (well none that i know of)..since we've had an interesting time when we get intimate, that and she goes to a workout area where the ex is known to go doesnt make for a good combo...and i think that may be messing with her head...now i know i should be really thinking about all this and asking myself why am i even bothering, but i always wanted to see what it would be like to be with her and now that i am so close, i feel as if i am so far at the same time...i dont think we will ever be exclusively dating until she figures out what she wants in life in general for that is really holding her down from alot of things, as well as kick the ex or tell me the truth of the matter....

 

We've talked a million times about how good it could really be if we were to be together, but the one thing that should be amazing isnt that amazing and i think that as well is making her think twice about how she feels, but we both kinda agreed that if thats not good than that must be a serious sign that maybe we arent meant to be?

[Momene]

You owe it to each other to clarify where you stand. Life's too short for maybes and if/buts.